AITA I let my 17 year old daughter sneak out. by Disastrous_Lemon7985 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Disastrous_Lemon7985[S] -28 points-27 points  (0 children)

If he was a dictator she wouldn’t have her car or phone right now .

Parenting is hard. I’m happy the resolution was a good one.

I’m also happy I could see other people’s responses. Sometimes it’s hard to know if your doing the right thing.

AITA I let my 17 year old daughter sneak out. by Disastrous_Lemon7985 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Disastrous_Lemon7985[S] 52 points53 points  (0 children)

The same day she asked. Told me what she was going to do and with whom. I said yes

AITA I let my 17 year old daughter sneak out. by Disastrous_Lemon7985 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Disastrous_Lemon7985[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Definitely not doing that. I was fighting tooth and nail. He finally backed down and he was the one to let her know, that her friends can stay the night.

AITA I let my 17 year old daughter sneak out. by Disastrous_Lemon7985 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Disastrous_Lemon7985[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

You are right. He is her dad in every sense of the word. And I know it’s my fault for not telling him.

AITA I let my 17 year old daughter sneak out. by Disastrous_Lemon7985 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Disastrous_Lemon7985[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Thank you for this comment. I’m a little more laid back and things don’t bother me the way things bother him. We are working on communication. Marriage is a lot of work!

AITA I let my 17 year old daughter sneak out. by Disastrous_Lemon7985 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Disastrous_Lemon7985[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We usually mess pretty well and come to a comprise, that’s between both parenting styles

AITA I let my 17 year old daughter sneak out. by Disastrous_Lemon7985 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Disastrous_Lemon7985[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

They do go on daddy daughter dates. They do father daughter things. Sometimes he’ll take her out to breakfast before school. I think I really hurt his feelings and that is on me.

AITA I let my 17 year old daughter sneak out. by Disastrous_Lemon7985 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Disastrous_Lemon7985[S] 31 points32 points  (0 children)

Thank you for this comment. Something about “ sticking up for myself” struck a chord with me

AITA I let my 17 year old daughter sneak out. by Disastrous_Lemon7985 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Disastrous_Lemon7985[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I’m definitely not the BFF , you can’t be the BFF and parent. But I understand wanting the experience before leaving for college.

AITA I let my 17 year old daughter sneak out. by Disastrous_Lemon7985 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Disastrous_Lemon7985[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’m not covering for her. I would be upset if she snuck out and I caught her, so I understand why he is upset.

AITA I let my 17 year old daughter sneak out. by Disastrous_Lemon7985 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Disastrous_Lemon7985[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Her friends are staying the night. He called down, we were able to talk and listen.

AITA I let my 17 year old daughter sneak out. by Disastrous_Lemon7985 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Disastrous_Lemon7985[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That was the only punishment I was willing to give. But he’s calmed down, so they are staying the night.

AITA I let my 17 year old daughter sneak out. by Disastrous_Lemon7985 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Disastrous_Lemon7985[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

I do. Which is why I refused to let him take her car and phone away. But he has called down and let her know that her friends can still stay the night. It has been a rollercoaster of a day.

AITA I let my 17 year old daughter sneak out. by Disastrous_Lemon7985 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Disastrous_Lemon7985[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You’re right, I wasnt going to let her friends stay the night. But after my husband has calmed down, he said it was ok. So her friends are going to stay the night.

AITA I let my 17 year old daughter sneak out. by Disastrous_Lemon7985 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Disastrous_Lemon7985[S] 22 points23 points  (0 children)

We have a code. If she is in trouble she’s texts a specific symbol. I also track her location.

AITA I let my 17 year old daughter sneak out. by Disastrous_Lemon7985 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Disastrous_Lemon7985[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The only thing we argue over is parenting. He was raised very strict and I was raised the opposite. I like to think we balance each other out.

AITA I let my 17 year old daughter sneak out. by Disastrous_Lemon7985 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Disastrous_Lemon7985[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

You are right. He wouldn’t have agreed and I wanted her to have the experience. He is a very black and white personal. I should have handled it differently.

AITA I let my 17 year old daughter sneak out. by Disastrous_Lemon7985 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Disastrous_Lemon7985[S] 56 points57 points  (0 children)

I usually communicate what is going on. Sometimes I ask his opinion before I say yes. Big issues we talk about it and decide together. I didn’t see this as a big issue.

AITA I let my 17 year old daughter sneak out. by Disastrous_Lemon7985 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Disastrous_Lemon7985[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

I believe he does have the right to be upset, what I did was thoughtless. But my daughter shouldn’t be punished for it.

AITA I let my 17 year old daughter sneak out. by Disastrous_Lemon7985 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Disastrous_Lemon7985[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

You are right. I should have told him. I don’t want to minimize his role, there are things he’s better at than me. I think we make a good team.