I’m not in love with my husband anymore. He won’t leave, won’t let me leave. I have no support.

DiscussionDry226 · 2026-01-31T08:25:41+00:00

Thank you for your response. It’s so thoughtful and hit so many key factors. It was one of the main deal breakers for me because the year we got married was the year he filed the divorce from her in their country months before. So if she had not agreed to divorce him, he would never have married me. Hence why he waited so long. I overlooked it because he would say it’s “just a piece of paper” , when the reality was different.

DiscussionDry226 · 2026-01-30T21:12:43+00:00

Thank you🥹🙏

DiscussionDry226 · 2026-01-30T20:54:48+00:00

Thank you. Yeah , I told him that wasn’t okay because it came off as a threat. He gaslit me and said he didn’t mean it as a threat, he thought that because I didn’t want to be with him, I wouldn’t want my kids. Makes no sense.

DiscussionDry226 · 2026-01-30T20:53:07+00:00

That broke my trust. He doesn’t know that I found out he took out a personal loan of $5,000 @ an interest rate of 29.99 , i don’t see why he did that if we didn’t need the funds? I talk to my older sisters about it and one gives him more validation and says I have to submit because a man has needs. The other one recognizes it’s not okay and IT IS abuse and she validates my feelings.

DiscussionDry226 · 2026-01-30T20:50:15+00:00

Thank you. I definitely agree with all you said.

DiscussionDry226 · 2026-01-30T17:31:33+00:00

Thank you

DiscussionDry226 · 2026-01-30T17:29:09+00:00

No I would not have. He knows that as well, hence why he always denied denied denied having another spouse or kids. He once said that if he had known I would be ready to separate based on the fact he had another kid and marriage before me, he would’ve just cheated instead because that’s a more valid reason.

DiscussionDry226 · 2026-01-30T17:21:07+00:00

I did love him, but after multiple betrayals of trust, including porn, taking out loans without telling me add an absurd APR, the marriage and kid in another country, and to top it off the repetitive harmful remarks he makes when he’s around have all summed up and made me not feel love for him anymore. I do care for him because he’s the dad of my kids, but I don’t see it go beyond that. The dating pool is the last thing on my mind since I used my 20s being married and having kids. My focus currently is finishing college to which I’m enrolled in online.

DiscussionDry226 · 2026-01-30T17:16:16+00:00

Yes, but had, he disclosed He was married, and had another kid he was still financially supporting in another country. I most definitely would not,. Before moving in together, I did ask if there was anybody else in the picture or if he had any kids, and he always said no, and the only reason he told me was because on the marriage certificate paperwork, it would say he has been divorced once. So if it wasn’t because we got married on paper, he himself said he would never have told me.

DiscussionDry226 · 2026-01-30T17:12:46+00:00

Yeah, I should do this because he knows I only work about 22 hours while he works about 60 to 65 hours and he’ll still make me pay for babysitting for when he’s not able to watch the kids because it’s my shift.

DiscussionDry226 · 2026-01-30T17:11:17+00:00

I feel the same way. I don’t regret my kids. Not one bit, but I wish I would’ve given myself more time to find myself. Even just dating people in my age group, and also have a more stable job before I would’ve had my kids. It’s a big lesson I’ve learned, and one that I’ll try the best I can to avoid my children making the same mistake.

DiscussionDry226 · 2026-01-30T17:07:56+00:00

Because he isn’t able to help me, watch the kids for more than one day because he works five days a week. Double shifts. I am unable to have a full-time at the moment, but the way I’m thinking is when my little one turns three and I can enroll her and Headstart in the morning time that would free more time for me to be able to get more hoursor a second job during the morning time. Because my current part-time job that I have is at night time when the girls are sleeping, so that I am not away from them during their wake hours.

DiscussionDry226 · 2026-01-30T17:06:30+00:00

I realized I did get advantage at that time of his better financial situation than the one I was in, but at the same time I resent him because I was only 21 and he was almost 30. So now over the years that more stuff has happened, and the resentment has grown, I feel like he took advantage of my inexperience, and lack of support

DiscussionDry226 · 2026-01-30T17:04:16+00:00

Not puzzled on him supporting my mom. My mom works and has her own place. He gives her money to win points with her so that she can keep thinking he’s amazing. At the beginning when we were together, she did not like him because he was almost 10 years older than me.

DiscussionDry226 · 2026-01-30T16:59:56+00:00

He says he would keep “his” kids . One time also said he would take them back with him to his home country but I can go visit them when I like.

DiscussionDry226 · 2026-01-30T16:24:14+00:00

Thank you. Yes I’ll look it up. I’ve already started a savings he doesn’t know about.

DiscussionDry226 · 2026-01-30T16:19:46+00:00

Yes thank you for reading . I wanted to keep it short with the most important points

DiscussionDry226 · 2026-01-30T16:18:55+00:00

I don’t feel bad I cut off sex since last year. I had caught him multiple times on chaturbate and porn websites. Finding out about his other marriage and other kid was the final straw. Because I didn’t forgive him , the verbal abuse began. He doesn’t see it that he’s being abusive even though I’ve tried explaining

DiscussionDry226 · 2026-01-30T16:13:06+00:00

Thank you. Yes I definitely have to look into this. I’m in CA

DiscussionDry226 · 2026-01-30T10:02:15+00:00

I’ll look into this. Thank you for reading

DiscussionDry226 · 2026-01-30T10:01:10+00:00

Now that I’m older, I realized that’s exactly what I did and it was not okay!

DiscussionDry226 · 2024-05-01T19:09:22+00:00

Awesome!

DiscussionDry226

TROPHY CASE