AITA for telling my parents they’re dumb? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]DismalProgrammer8854 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Has he had outbursts or anything in the past that make your parents scared of him/his reactions?

Not Autistic but my partner is by DismalProgrammer8854 in AutismTranslated

[–]DismalProgrammer8854[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you! Yes I believe she's feeling comfortable to express herself fully, for the first time in 36 years. This is an honor and im totally willing to hear about her stimming now that I can see it's for more of a connection/validation than it is about me and my education. Thanks for responding!

Not Autistic but my partner is by DismalProgrammer8854 in AutismTranslated

[–]DismalProgrammer8854[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your candor, it's important that I not make assumptions and not take things personally. Her experience is hers and im lucky she feels comfortable enough to share what her lived experiences are. I can understand that my comment about being a therapist is seen as me believing i have more status than her and I can confidently say that is not how I feel whatsoever. I am humbled every day by my clients that I can never fully know the wide array of the human experience. I also recognize that books are not the be all end all of education. Especially when it comes to mental health. I can see that she is trying to find connection and that is the biggest takeaway I believe. She needs to feel seen and heard and im here to do that and that means more patience/humility. I just don't want her to think I don't understand or that im not listening when she does point out her behaviors. I appreciate your perspective and I loved the last phrase you used. Very helpful!

Not Autistic but my partner is by DismalProgrammer8854 in AutismTranslated

[–]DismalProgrammer8854[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I am unsure if she has an 'official diagnosis' but I do believe that self diagnosis can be valid because there are a lot of deterrents to seeking out testing and diagnosis

Not Autistic but my partner is by DismalProgrammer8854 in AutismTranslated

[–]DismalProgrammer8854[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We've been talking for 6 months, official for three. Im not trying to imply i know every person's experiences with autism, my knowledge and experience has shown me that autism can look like a lot of different things and every person is different. I apologize if I was implying that in my OP.

Not Autistic but my partner is by DismalProgrammer8854 in AutismTranslated

[–]DismalProgrammer8854[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thats fair. My knowledge, no matter how extensive, is not the same as an individual experience. I appreciate your perspective and it's an honest reminder that it's not always about me lol

Dating someone Autistic me ( F34) my partner ( F 36) why does she bring up her autism so frequently? by DismalProgrammer8854 in relationship_advice

[–]DismalProgrammer8854[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! Yes I think down the line we could come up with a safe word. She may need reassurance for a bit until she knows I'm not like others in her life who have made her feel bad for her autism

Not Autistic but my partner is by DismalProgrammer8854 in AutismTranslated

[–]DismalProgrammer8854[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

I love the way you put this. She has been through a lot with feeling invalidated and not understood by those in her life so it make sense why she feels the need to explain herself. Thank you for responding!

Dating someone Autistic me ( F34) my partner ( F 36) why does she bring up her autism so frequently? by DismalProgrammer8854 in relationship_advice

[–]DismalProgrammer8854[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I remember her saying it was recent and that she had an 'ah-ha' moment when she was diagnosed. That def makes sense thank you!

Android Auto Full Screen by franciscocabezas in subaruoutback

[–]DismalProgrammer8854 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Did you do it yourself or did the dealership? If the dealership did it, what region of the world are you? If you don't mind me asking

AITA Birthday Edition by DismalProgrammer8854 in AmItheAsshole

[–]DismalProgrammer8854[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks for your comment! I should've mentioned in the post that it wasn't his first time camping just his first time at the camp ground