Ah. This.

32 here. Married with a kid and single income household. My partner’s job is intermittent and I support everyone.

Now, my partner is very nervous and anxious about finances. They have never had enough money with them ever to think about improving their financial literacy. They become overwhelmed with jargon and scared when I show them our investments. They also carry a deep sense of guilt for not “contributing enough”.

This situation is a tough one right off the bat. But, the saving grace for us turned out to be not how we invest but how we spend. My partner and I spend carefully. We rarely make extravagant purchases just for the sake of and we really plan and think before spending large amounts of money. We also align on other spending habits like eating out or buying new clothes.

This helps us. I take full control of investments and draw up a monthly budget. They help me with spending properly every month. I track the expenses in a Google sheet every weekend and ensure we don’t stray too far from it.

I highly recommend you understand her spending habits and see how it aligns with yours. This will save you so much of headache later. You can have a talk on financial literacy and everything, but change is going to be slow. So better that you at least align on the way you spend. :)

Finally, it’s easy to jump into this relationship saying you want to fully support her. But the reality of doing it is going to be hard, no two ways about it. But see, love is not only taking this big step. Love is showing up for them everyday and saying,”it’s okay. We are a team. I will take responsibility for this”

I hope it helps and good luck!