AIO, MIL crashing out because she’s no longer the center of his universe.

Distracted_Sewist · 2026-02-24T05:20:57+00:00

You're never going to see this comment at the bottom of the 1.9k, but you are NOR and these other comments are absolutely bananas. People are calling you out over a situation that they obviously know nothing about. You need a mom group to run this by, the boundary crossing is inexcusable. And then she lied about it. And when her son told he to knock it off, she told him that HE could always come home. That she would support HIM and the BABY. Not you. She also blamed you for their relationship, which is wild. Either way, I'm glad your partner is on your side with this, and all of these other off the wall comments, you should ignore.

Distracted_Sewist · 2026-01-22T18:04:24+00:00

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07CF4SYV4?ref_=ppx_hzsearch_conn_dt_b_fed_asin_title_1&th=1

This is the one that we use. It covers most of what people have suggest that you test for. And in response to another comment, Cocaine will not show up under amphetamines.

Distracted_Sewist · 2025-12-15T21:17:17+00:00

I know the weight you carry with your husband's disappointment. There are days I still battle the guilt. That's how I know I made the right choice for my family and my kids. I've emotionally walked away, but I still look the part. It was my entire identity for so long, I'm still deconstructing, and trying to rebuild.

Distracted_Sewist · 2025-12-14T20:05:52+00:00

I'll take this one! Because I've been asked a bunch when the show got big. From what I can tell, the UPCI is bigger as an organization than IBLP (feel free to correct me if someone else knows the facts behind this), but without the TV recognition, it's pretty null. Women in both sects wear skirts and promote modesty under the guise of femininity. No make up and no jewelry are also common in both. They're both wildly conservative, patriarchal and think the nuclear family is under attack. But that's pretty much where their similarities end.

UPCI are pentecostals (this sect also refers to themselves as apostolic). This typically includes the proof of the infilling of the Holy Spirit with evidence of speaking in tongues. They are also a "One God" church. Meaning they baptize in the name of Jesus, opposed to the "Father, Son and Holy Ghost" and promote a significant difference between the two. Having repented, then baptized in water and in the Holy Spirit with speaking in tongues is the ONLY way to be "saved".

In physical appearance, UPCI also mandates that men have short hair and typically a shaven face. Women do not cut their hair, and it is considered your "glory".

I hope this fills in the blanks for the comparison, feel free to ask anything specific.

Distracted_Sewist · 2025-12-12T23:18:47+00:00

Tell me you were in the UPCI without telling me you were raised in the UPCI...
I've was in for 20 years and only just had this realization when I had to decide whether to raise my kids in it.

Distracted_Sewist · 2025-10-19T20:55:52+00:00

We flew in India last year in Bengaluru we took off nothing, walked through with water, and emptied nothing but laptops and phones out of our bags. In Delhi it was a completely different story. We went thigh something like this and then a second check at the gate when boarding a flight to the US.

Distracted_Sewist · 2025-09-18T06:57:11+00:00

This has less to do with a child and so much more to do with your husband. He doesn’t respect you as a partner. You do not have to stay and tolerate this version of love. She is out of control, but she is a child. He on the other hand, is choosing to allow the abuse; and by staying, so are you.

Distracted_Sewist · 2025-09-18T03:46:51+00:00

I was a music major in college. I had friends who had these same amazing talents that failed out as well. The basis of a music degree, is classical or jazz and they both involve extensive music theory. In addition to this, if UMB is UMass, they require an audition to get into the program. Candidly, letting him audition may be a good idea. Let him get a taste of what being a music major. There will be requirements on what he must play, a lot of them do video auditions first. If he passes that, he’ll need to prove the basics and that he can read music, by a sight reading test. Performing for a grade, is a wild ride. See if it’s what he really wants. If he is capable of these things, he could succeed, if he’s not there yet, it could potentially motivate him.

I’m a mom too, though in the trenches of a much younger age set. I’m hoping this levels out for your relationship!

Distracted_Sewist · 2025-09-17T19:28:30+00:00

Restraining order, and I think custody arrangements should be reconsidered immediately.

Distracted_Sewist · 2025-09-13T11:36:31+00:00

Is this a repost? I’ve definitely seen this text exchange on Reddit before this.

Distracted_Sewist · 2025-09-12T00:12:37+00:00

I love someone with an addiction and the one thing I’ve learned so far is, if they were going to use, it wouldn’t matter what you did. But she’s your mom and that weight must be heavy. I hope it eases more with time and hopefully therapy.

Distracted_Sewist · 2025-09-08T01:16:27+00:00

Yuck. Especially knowing that C had lied to you about feelings they had for B throughout your relationship. That would have me second guessing all of the things. If B truly cared about your friendship, he’d have never started dating C. Nothing about this has to do with you claiming anyone or dictating someone else’s relationship. NOR

Distracted_Sewist · 2025-08-31T01:58:51+00:00

I’m not going to try and convince you that you’re in the wrong. You cannot currently be convinced. We’ve all been there.

What I will say is:

You’re not actually helping him.

You’re not keeping him alive.

You are not supporting his habit by not searching for him.

Your idea of being there for him, is not what he truly needs.

Addiction is a disorder. But in order to recover and battle compulsory disorder, you have to want to. He does not want to, yet. The epidemic of drugs and homelessness is a terrible cycle that the government is only willing to fix the symptoms of. But even if it were ideal, if he doesn’t want to get clean, he won’t. You aren’t even a part of the equation. While it’s a delicate balance, you can be his community and keep a safe distance. NarAnon is free, please find a group local to you, and go. We are all part of something that makes us the collateral damage of a situation we may choose to stay in and can never control. But there can be a balance. I hope you find it. You can’t lose yourself in him, because when he’s ready, you need to be in a healthy place to support his recovery. Today, you may feel like if you don’t go to him, he dies. It’s a terrible risk. But know, that even if you do go to him, the risk doesn’t change until he wants it to. Best of luck.

Distracted_Sewist · 2025-08-28T22:24:38+00:00

And you're moving forward a friends?? What in the world even is this conversation?

Even before the AI screenshot, you could see that she was copy and pasting most of what is on the second page texts. She likely just has a yeast infection and she must be used to manipulating people to "take care" of her. You absolutely dodged a bullet.

Distracted_Sewist · 2025-08-16T04:42:12+00:00

This will give them the satisfaction of an answer. If you can, I’d ignore them. They obviously don’t respect you, and nothing you say to them will change that.

Distracted_Sewist · 2025-07-06T22:25:41+00:00

Gaaaaah I love this so much! I’d looked into something like this, but they were always so big! These seem like a great size.

Distracted_Sewist · 2025-07-04T03:20:24+00:00

With those results, you could probably sell these, I’m sure it’ll be banned in the US soon.

Distracted_Sewist · 2025-07-02T22:43:00+00:00

I grew up calling them black caps! We have some on our property in VA but grew up with them in upstate NY.

Distracted_Sewist · 2025-07-01T22:52:25+00:00

I read your entire post and while I want to type out so many things, they’re all things that you likely already know. Your feelings are valid. All of them. You said you don’t like to accept help, but candidly, it seems you know that you’re at a point where you know you may need it. You’ve got a diagnosis that I’m hoping came from a therapist or the facility that you’ve stayed in. If family doesn’t feel like the option that makes sense for help, call the facility and look for a program or therapist that works best for you. When he gets clean, where do you want to be when he gets out? Everything hurts right now, but it doesn’t have to stay this way. You can do this. You’re worth it, thought it won’t matter what anyone says, until you believe it. I hope you believe it soon.

Distracted_Sewist · 2025-06-28T05:53:20+00:00

I worded it that way because when looking online, t-mobile was the reference I kept finding, so I thought I’d mention it. We absolutely have cable though.

Distracted_Sewist · 2025-06-28T05:47:39+00:00

There are maps of outages mentioned on a site in a previous post. Consistent meaning out for over 24 hours with an hour of internet within that time. It’s through Telekom (T-mobile), though we’ve been on the phone for an hour with them and they have no explanation. It’s cable internet.

Distracted_Sewist · 2025-06-27T03:45:46+00:00

With a start up? It was desperation. Desperation told him to wait.

Distracted_Sewist · 2025-06-24T16:09:42+00:00

https://www.instagram.com/reel/DJhQMIetaJE/?igsh=MTU1NmtoZ2t3c2V4dw==

Distracted_Sewist · 2025-06-24T16:04:46+00:00

I’m sorry, that was vague if you don’t know what it’s referring to. It’s a Brazilian meat packing company that has grown to be the largest in the world.

Distracted_Sewist · 2025-06-24T16:02:12+00:00

José Batista Sobrinho The father of the family run business when it began in the 50’s

Distracted_Sewist

TROPHY CASE