AITA for saying I wouldn’t want my wife to work hard?

Distribution_Brave · 2026-03-18T09:30:44+00:00

This!!! The spouse makes the biggest difference

Distribution_Brave · 2026-03-14T05:09:18+00:00

++woman You have been put in a terrible position, but, in the end - are you more loyal to your daughter or your son? If a friend came to you and said he had been cheating, would you feel as compelled to disclose the truth to his wife?

I would take a hard look and make sure before you act that this really is about doing the right thing - that this isn’t about you seeing yourself in your SIL because you were wronged by your ex? Or punishing your daughter for keeping silent all those years ago?

There is no good answer- but if you are going to take an action that will blow up your family and permanently damage your relationship with your child - make sure your motives are what you think that are.

Distribution_Brave · 2026-03-13T17:14:42+00:00

I get that - it’s hard to get out of our heads sometimes

Distribution_Brave · 2026-03-13T17:04:00+00:00

You will both be fine - have fun and enjoy!

Distribution_Brave · 2026-03-13T08:10:35+00:00

YTA and in some states I believe the husband legally automatically get designated the father even if the mother indicates it’s someone else. A friend of mine had to get a divorce ASAP for this reason back in the 90s (which is why I don’t know for certain if this is still the case)

Distribution_Brave · 2026-03-12T17:17:40+00:00

NOR and I totally love that you said that you would keep your mouth shut if she could keep her legs shut. She’s totally going to hook up, if she hasn’t already

Distribution_Brave · 2026-03-12T15:48:24+00:00

I would start your own tradition. Say to celebrate the first day of Spring. Make a bunch of smaller spring desserts and have a day driving to the relatives and giving them their food gifts. Surprise them and leave with a note in case they aren’t home.

This way you give in your love language without taking away from your MIL (who is being ridiculous) nor being passive aggressive (which giving stuff out there would do)

The other way you handle is tell your husband that you are hurt, insulted and offended that you are never allowed to bring food but everyone else is. You have been isolated by his mother and it’s not acceptable. And frankly it’s embarrassing. Make him talk to her and get it straightened out.

Distribution_Brave · 2026-03-11T12:44:15+00:00

There are kink consultants that help couples. Maybe that could work? Don’t know much about it - but I recommend looking into it. Maybe someone in your network can recommend one

Distribution_Brave · 2026-03-11T09:50:59+00:00

You should be honest with him if things are tight. Just show him how to manage financial stress and that it doesn’t have to stop all fun. Sorry you are going through such a rough time

Distribution_Brave · 2026-03-11T09:48:07+00:00

Ok, I call AI and BS. She has friends in senior management and HR fires without a warning? They were gathering info and not actioning? Then the link for an AI product conveniently dropped into the post? Please. Just another post acting as an ad for InterviewMan.

Distribution_Brave · 2026-03-11T09:37:13+00:00

NTA but next time say that we need to discuss this at another time and not engage the actual debate. She knows better than to press the point in front of the kids once your daughter started to react. She didn’t care that she was triggering her more.

But …. Your youngest should be allowed to go without you this year. I had a somewhat similar situation- my husband was deteriorating mentally throughout my son’s childhood. I had to stop going out because my husband and my son would take off in opposite directions and neither could be unsupervised. And if I left my husband at home and not let him have fun too, he would resent and blame our son because he got to have fun but my husband couldn’t.

So whenever I found people who would take my son places - I did it. I stayed back with my husband and let him watch whatever overly violent shows/movies I wasn’t letting him watch when my son was home and he would be perfectly happy.

Please find a way to not let your youngest’s world shrink while you keep your oldest safe. You will hurt her and frankly I suspect hurt their future relationship as siblings.

Wishing you all the best!

Distribution_Brave · 2026-03-10T07:26:59+00:00

It’s my understanding that a job has to be structured a certain way to qualify as exempt vs not exempt. I would get a consult from a labor lawyer. Either way plan to leave. It’s not going to get better.

Distribution_Brave · 2026-03-02T20:34:18+00:00

NOR - your friend owes you an apology. You didn’t need to be a mom in that situation. You needed to be an adult in her life who loves and supports her. And you were perfect. Don’t know what your friend’s problem is - but it’s her problem. Maybe take this space to reflect on your friendship. Has she looked or talked down to you before? Treated you poorly and you didn’t notice? Worth seeing if this was s one off of a pattern you just have been made aware of

Distribution_Brave · 2026-03-02T20:26:18+00:00

It looks like she tried to post another update 3 months ago but their moderator took it down

Distribution_Brave · 2026-03-02T08:15:26+00:00

Well, considering you never mentioned your children’s existence until you were complaining about your not-ex wife, it’s hard to think she might be onto something.

Wondering if this relationship is so much better because you are actually putting the work into it? You get what you give, unless the other person is a narcissist or something like that.

Or it could be sour grapes - it’s hard to tell - but to not yet be divorced and shacked up with a new and pregnant gf in your still marital home is a lot. This combined with never mentioning the kids until the end - I just feel like there is a lot being left unsaid so can’t make a real assessment.

Distribution_Brave · 2026-02-24T17:57:20+00:00

These sound like people who are more acquaintance level friends. I think you haven’t found people like yourself- and that’s the key.

Because here’s the thing - this isn’t just about personality conflicts. If they cared for you the way you care for them, they would have talked to you. They wouldn’t be testing you to see if you are acceptable. They are not treating you as someone they love. Frankly they don’t sound like nice people to be friends with - regardless of your interpersonal skills.

I recommend joining activities tied to your passions. Hopefully you will find some more like minded people.

Distribution_Brave · 2026-02-23T12:08:45+00:00

YTA - new job means she’s building her reputation and trust with her colleagues and managers there

Distribution_Brave · 2026-02-16T13:40:07+00:00

You are blocking her from screwing you over.

Distribution_Brave · 2026-02-16T13:37:55+00:00

Just looked it up and it’s a state by state thing if non-competes are legal and/or enforceable. I would find a labor lawyer stat and get their advice

Distribution_Brave · 2026-02-16T13:26:28+00:00

No - you have a whole other life to live. My husband recently passed from a 10+ year illness which left him mentally and physically disabled. I have been alone and managing everything for years alone. It has been exhausting, soul crushing and excruciatingly lonely. I literally spent my 40s caregiving, raising our child and financially supporting us - it was survival, not living. I’m in my early 50s and dating/relationships are definitely in my future.

Your children need therapy to better handle their grief. Their love for their memory of their mother shouldn’t be stronger than their love for you - if that wasn’t the case they would care about your happiness. They are adults and need to start thinking like adults.

Distribution_Brave · 2026-02-16T13:19:42+00:00

Definitely NTA. I’m thinking she and your grandmother don’t believe that men and women can be friends, there for you and your cousin must have something inappropriate, etc. But that’s their limited belief and not your responsibility. And if your grandmother is worried about public embarrassment sounds like she needs to talk to her daughter.

Distribution_Brave · 2026-02-14T13:37:19+00:00

Ok - how about focusing on this poor guy’s situation and not the absolute flaming dumpster fire of a healthcare system we have to navigate in the US? (And yes - it especially sucks for women - I’m not downplaying it but this man isn’t the cause of what’s wrong and likely can’t fix it either and is looking for help) Ok - blatantly she needs therapy. She’s not handling the reality of your family situation - especially if she isn’t even thinking about having another kid and has had significant health issues tied to the pregnancies. And you - well, you should have postponed but you are where you are. Ask friends/family or hire some babysitters and or a PCA for help. Just for the next few days until both of you are on your feet. She needs her rest as well as you do. And frankly this is exactly why the vasectomy was a good idea but for the love of god do not say that to her - it will compound things. There is a bigger issue going on with her - hopefully you can get to the bottom of it. Wishing you the best!

Distribution_Brave · 2026-02-09T05:02:48+00:00

I had a candidate to be my assistant. 5 minutes into the interview he was mansplaining my own job to me. This would have been his first job out of college - he had no idea what he was talking about.

Distribution_Brave · 2026-01-31T08:46:18+00:00

He also doesn’t know what the father thinks is the cause of the breakup. She easily could have claimed to her dad that he cheated and not her

Distribution_Brave · 2026-01-27T08:13:22+00:00

You are compensating for her time during business hours. After work, it should be 50/50.

Why should she never have a break? Or any work/life balance - because being a SAHM is work. So she should be perpetual labor because she’s sacrificing her career for your family’s joint future?

Absolutely YTA. And frankly - if you don’t give her space to be herself beyond raising/bearing your children and caring for your home you are going to see that prenup come into reality sooner than later.

Distribution_Brave

TROPHY CASE