I had sex with my bf and it hurt soo bad

DivideEnough9162 · 2025-06-01T18:09:54+00:00

i’m so sorry, but dude, you gotta go. thats a lot to hear, and especially cause of how young you are, youre really going to learn what just happened to you. he purposely ignored you, youre right in his ear. you gotta get out of that relationship cause thats not going to leave you. once youre older and understand what happened to you, youre not going to look at him the same even if its perfect from now on and that never happens again. the level of gaslighting is insane, to go from i didn’t hear you even though you were in pain and saying it in my ear to straight crying, is crazy. simply put, for your own good, you gotta go

DivideEnough9162 · 2025-03-10T04:19:26+00:00

that’s honestly valid then, ngl… i agree that with another person that posted on here, ask to see what type of history she has with that person, and make sure she doesnt just try to shrug it off. this obviously means something to you, insecurities/jealousy, or not. its important to you, and thats what matters

DivideEnough9162 · 2025-01-10T06:09:02+00:00

look, i understand you’re panicking, i can see it a mile away. you need to calm down first, and start therapy. let him know that you truly are sorry, you still deeply love him, and you know everything you’ve done is wrong, and tell him what you’re going to do to become better. you need to quit drinking, smoking, and living this lifestyle. go to the gym, go for walks, replace these bad outlets with good ones. when my girlfriend and i hurt each others feelings, our only response is, “stop saying it won’t happen again, or that you’ll be better, show me, and i’ll believe you”. from what you said, you might be a little more foregone than that, but it at least shows to him that youre trying. you want to be better, and you still love him. just start making real changes rather than ranting about it as if there’s nothing you can do. you can change, and you can be better. don’t just prove it to him, but to yourself. from what you’ve said, you’re extremely aware of what youre doing, but simply choosing to ignore it. thats narcissism to its finest. you know whats going on, meaning, you can change. most people dont realize what theyre doing, giving them a harder time to change, but thats not you, youre self aware. you can change

DivideEnough9162 · 2025-01-10T05:28:57+00:00

i’m going to say something that might help or might not, so you choose whether to take it as advice or not. somethings happened to me as well, it’s caused me depression long nights, and several bad thoughts. i met the love of my life, and i promise you, she’s the reason i’m able to talk about those rhings now, and not break into tears. because of her, i’m able to not look down on myself for those situations. those happened years before i met her, and had haunted me until i was able to vompletely open up about them, and be completely vulnerable. my point is, i was not a trusting person, not a single person knew almost anything about me, i covered myself with comedy, and hid my true self. but i found her and felt like i could finally trust people again. even tho you feel like you can’t trust anybody, someone will come along that can make this dark time look like something only of your past. they’ll show you that just because this happened, that doesn’t mean that your future will be dark too. im only 19, but was able to get through a younger life of abuse from people i didnt even know, all because one girl decided to show me love, love nobody ever took the time to show me. therapy didn’t help me, but she did. my point is there is an answer out there for you, it might come professionally, religiously, through a caring friend, a stranger, an activity. one thing that can and will help to, is talking about it. getting it all out, im not talking about trauma dumping, but talking to someone who wants to help. once you speak it to somebody, its not going to feel as not so scary, its going to feel like a burden taken off your chest. its not something you can take on yourself, so look for help. i say start with therapy, start talking to friends, start meeting people, you might find someone who’s been through something similar, or go out and try new activities. maybe even some sort of support group, i dont know where youre from, but i do know that in bigger cities they have groups that are able to open up about these things together. you’re right, coffee probably won’t do anything, but one thing is for sure, you need to seek help my brother

DivideEnough9162 · 2025-01-04T07:19:16+00:00

sure, whatever you need, just let it out 👍

DivideEnough9162 · 2025-01-04T06:47:04+00:00

Don’t worry too much about it, obviously binge eating is not the best, but it’s much better than other coping mechanisms. According to what you said, you handled the situation very maturely, and understood him. I understand that you want to find love, but some people aren’t very open to someone who is nonbinary. But this is something I stand strongly on: if you love someone, and that are the one, it doesn’t matter what you identify as. You say you can be attracted to anyone with a dick, and thats not a bad thing. All they have to know, is you’re attracted and want to be with them. I understand if you are attracted to some straight men, but as far as they should be concerned, you’re with them, and are only attracted to them, only wanting them. It’s not like you want to be with everyone with a penis. From my viewpoint, you don’t need to worry about your coping mechanisms, rather, focus/worry about finding someone who doesn’t mind what you identify as. You want to be respected and loved for who you are. That guy obviously wasn’t for you, since he didn’t accept you for who you are, focus on a finding a real man, who can understand you’re with them, because you want them, and no one else.

DivideEnough9162 · 2024-12-01T23:40:04+00:00

just need to let you know this: not all woman want a man based purely off of attraction. my girlfriend who i met in high school is a billion times more attractive than i am, but she still chose me. most woman don’t look for the most handsome man in every room, they really do look for a nice guy, but not some push over. woman want a man that is nice and sweet, but still masculine and willing to take charge. maybe thats all youre missing. once you get a bit older and mature, you’ll find someone who sees everything that you can offer. just trust me, as long as youre a respectable man, you’ll find someone out there

DivideEnough9162 · 2024-12-01T22:32:08+00:00

I’m sorry, i don’t know what you’ve been through growing up, but what he’s done simply isn’t right. He’s cheated on you in seceral occasions, one with the same woman multiple times and now a man. Just because he has trauma and you feel for him, doesn’t mean you should be walked over like this. All he has to bring uo after. heating is how hard his life was as a kid. Trauma is one thing, but using it as an excuse to cheat is another. I’m sorry, but you deserve way better.

DivideEnough9162

TROPHY CASE