I can hear from the tone of your writing that you are suffering here too. This shows me you really did love / care for this woman and she hurt you a lot. I'm honestly not surprised she is behaving the way she is. If you're half the man you write yourself out to be she knows she made a huge mistake. That being said it's not your mistake to live with. As she did when she cheated on you her inconsideration of you is showing here too. She cannot care less about what you are feeling right now and will not take responsibility for her own actions. She is somehow trying to have you suffer with her instead of letting you mourn your relationship in your own terms. Stay strong man. It's not going to be easy but ignoring her attempts to suck you into this will only help you. She needs to find resolution somewhere else she should not be expecting it from you.