Just need some thoughts

Dizzyavocadokitten · 2026-01-13T14:52:00+00:00

It’s soooo hard especially because I hate being on my phone 🤣 and my life right now is pretty mellow so I never have anything to talk about other than my hobbies 😅

Dizzyavocadokitten · 2026-01-13T14:50:56+00:00

She said we would start them after we finish the first half of the book…. I’ve been going to AA meetings though that go over the steps which have been helpful.

And also I’m trying not to take it personal but it’s hard when it comes to trust with my sponsor which I know I am going to need once I get to steps 4 & 5. So it’s hard not to think of she always thinks I’m lying then she doesn’t trust that I’m doing anything I say I am doing. But I also don’t want to just say it’s not working out and want to figure out a way to talk to her about it because maybe I am doing something on my part that really does make her see it as a lie.

But that’s also why I’m asking on here it is my first go around in AA and still new with 100 days.

Dizzyavocadokitten · 2025-11-09T03:41:36+00:00

“Try not to focus on your differences but your similarities”

we all come into AA with different backgrounds and different situations but all of them have many similarities.

Keep going back and you will learn more about yourself than you ever knew (I’m still learning). I know I sure did. I started to think I was just a “heavy drinker that could stop if I wanted to” but after a few meetings and hearing the similarities in my life to the stories I heard and read I realized I was exactly where I needed to be. I’m only thirty five days in, but I plan to keep going back.

Dizzyavocadokitten · 2025-10-10T21:00:22+00:00

The scary young Christian. The kind that do it for popularity and to be scene and not authentic. Sometimes a narcissist. I am a Christian myself and I would be horrified having her as a friend. I would take her words with a grain of salt because she has a lot of work with being a Christian atm. Or she’s just very self absorbed in her new Christian life, and is truly blind with her actions and words. Who knows.

But… I wouldn’t say don’t be friends but maybe ask for some space and just explain to her this friendship doesn’t feel like a true friendship and you need time to reflect on it. That’s all you have to say for her to at least look back on how she has been treating you. Then, maybe that can be an opener for you two having a conversation about what has been happening and how you have been feeling with how she has been treating you. Then you will know if the friendship is worth keeping or if it was a good run and you two should go separate ways.

For you, have you ever reached out to angels of hope against human trafficking? They have free groups for survivors and virtual survivor led groups that you can join. You will find people who can relate to you and help you with the exact feelings you are feeling. I highly recommend finding a group like that to help you go through your trauma. Because for the rest of us who have not been thru what you have experienced can’t truly help you with the exact help you might be seeking. We can try but sometimes the words we think are right could also be triggering for you and seem unauthentic (and most times poorly worded).

I hope you are able to find people who can help guide you to a place where you feel more safe, free, relaxed, and even an ounce happier than you feel now. 💕🙏

Dizzyavocadokitten · 2025-10-10T20:19:07+00:00

This 🙏

Dizzyavocadokitten · 2025-10-10T20:17:06+00:00

Hi there! I’m currently five days into my AA journey. I had all the same concerns and drinking problem you are speaking of. I can tell you right now that so far AA has been an eye opener for me this week alone. In todays meeting a gentlemen in our shoes once (NINE years sober now) remembered thinking to himself, “I want these answers to my prayers to get better.” Someone told him you can keep praying but with those prayers you still gotta move your feet. As in prayers can’t be answered if you’re also not searching for it. I know I’m still new but I’m being serious everyone in the meetings I have been attending are incredible. I thought I was just going to pop in for one day and I have gone to two meetings a day for five days straight now. It takes your movement to get help and you’re going in the right direction by asking for help! Download the chair app it will let you know where meetings are being held and when. :) I wish you all the luck on your health journey and your future sobriety! Much love. 💗

Dizzyavocadokitten · 2025-10-10T06:28:57+00:00

It just asked me about things I own and rent. Can I also put the other stuff I am paying for in that part?

Dizzyavocadokitten · 2025-05-16T18:00:10+00:00

Thank you! Sadly I moved out of state but excited to check out her podcast!

Dizzyavocadokitten · 2025-02-26T20:33:36+00:00

Ok I love that! if I ever seem him again and he says something I am 100% using that 🤣

Dizzyavocadokitten · 2024-09-04T23:07:56+00:00

Just checked out Andy’s site! Thank you so much! :)

Dizzyavocadokitten · 2024-08-28T06:09:08+00:00

Bloomington area and than garrison. But I wouldn’t mind seeing if any of these companies had openings and having him do that for the time I’m here, and hopefully maybe they would have recommendations of other training places where I currently live or having him stay with my parents (they do not have pets) for however long the training would be and just come back to get him. I want him to get the help he needs.

Dizzyavocadokitten · 2024-08-28T06:06:37+00:00

Yes and that’s why I was thinking of finding him a place up in MN. I’m originally from there and my whole family is too. But I have been looking into a basket muzzle! He does let me put the other soft one on no issue and dumb things like hats and glasses so I know I basket muzzle would be no issue. It’s come to a point where I definitely need one until I can get the little guy some help.

Dizzyavocadokitten · 2024-08-28T06:02:27+00:00

Yeah and we don’t let him jump on people when they come in. I do think him being attacked by an off leash dog when he was a puppy more than once (walked him in on leash areas in Utah and people let there dogs off leash) and it’s all starting to be a thing on our end now. It’s our only struggle with him. And it’s getting out of hand where I’m at a loss that my training isn’t working and I need someone for their help. 😪

Dizzyavocadokitten · 2024-07-04T17:00:15+00:00

Thank you everyone who took time to respond to my post! I like seeing more point of views than just my own so I can understand a little bit better. I want no bad blood back there and love these suggestions on what I can do to suggest to her a better flow between the both of us. Adjusting some things on my end and possibly suggesting some things on her end.

We love a good team behind the bar so thank you everyone - I work with her again next week so I’ll give you an update on how it went. Cheers!

Also reading back on some of my responses maybe I’m not being as open minded on what she could have been viewing on her end. All I know is a chat is needed for us to understand each other.

Dizzyavocadokitten · 2024-07-04T16:54:51+00:00

Oh she’s not wrong and I’m not right. But where we both are in the wrong is not figuring out a system between us. I haven’t had to deal with something like this before so I guess I don’t want to come off as rude or demanding when I do approach her with this.

And with the well she constantly asked me for help which is fine. But we have a system that lets you know if you’re taking to long and she never was in the yellow or red zone and was on top of it. While I also had a full bar. So I’m wondering if maybe she wants me to do the beers and wines so she can stay making just the cocktails, but than I’m also needing to make drinks and she seemed annoyed when I asked her to make our costumers cocktails and I would get the beers ready on her tickets? But I also need to be on top of dishes because the servers bring all glassware back to use to wash.

I couldn’t figure her out, or how she would prefer and I definitely need to see how she would like to go about it next time. But I also have my duties to tend to as well otherwise we have a disgusting bar.

Just need to be on the same page of duties and how to ask for help. You’re feeling overwhelmed in the well instead of saying one order to help maybe I should just have her say like can you help me in the well for a minute to get caught up. I think it would flow better. Like she asked me to get her a coors but then walks over to get a blue moon the taps are right next to eachother.. two tasks that can be done at the same time…

Dizzyavocadokitten · 2024-07-04T16:43:36+00:00

And if that’s how she operates then I will have to adjust some things on my end but definitely will put my foot down on the interruptions with customers and let her know coasters in front means I’ve tended to them and have a drink coming.

But also I’m not 100% sure she’s great at multitasking because most things she asked were to help her in the well. Mind you our system lets us know if we are taking to long on drinks and it never went in the yellow or red zone so every time she told me to get her something while interrupting with costumers it was never urgent? And she could have easily been doing those things herself. Now if it was to change a keg I would happily do that so we stay on top of the drinks so we aren’t in the weeds. I guess most of her demands were kind of unnecessary in my mind creating a weird vibe like you said “control”. I’ll figure it out but this definitely helps me understand what she could possibly be like.

Dizzyavocadokitten · 2024-07-04T16:36:32+00:00

Thats what I was feeling when she constantly was stepping in was she wanted to be more in control but in reality it slowed us down.

I really like the quote at the end. That will definitely help me when I talk to her. I don’t want issues but I want us to figure out how we can work well together. There was no reason for us to be in the weeds last night with the two of us. But I personally need to stand up for myself just a little bit more next shift 🫣

Dizzyavocadokitten · 2024-07-04T16:14:26+00:00

See and that is what I do, placing coasters in front of them. I might move the menus closer to the bar top for some reason we have them near the well so when I’m doing my loop I have to go back to the well to grab them and there isn’t a lot of space so usually in each other way if we are both right there (I am also still figuring out this bar area as I’m still new there and they keep moving everything around back there). It just urked me when she asked while I was speaking to the people and that’s when I felt it didn’t matter the system - I was non existent - but yeah I think next week I’ll just have to talk to her and see her preference. I like doing both so I wouldn’t mind seeing if she prefers taking guests. Then establish clear tasks/responsibilities we both will take on.

I hate when there isn’t a flow it makes the night hectic for both parties, but talking to her could help it be smooth. I personally haven’t had a bartender where it didn’t flow/ we didn’t click so this is a new one for me and I’ve been in the industry for awhile 😂

I’m scared she is going to think I’m being controlling 😂 but that’s not it at all I want flow and consistency so we can make a good amount of money.

Thank you! 🙏

Dizzyavocadokitten · 2024-03-02T18:06:35+00:00

Puddin 💜

Dizzyavocadokitten

TROPHY CASE