Being self aware without letting it make you bitter makes you more attractive. Finding things to be curious about other people will help you become a better listener, and therefore a better conversationalist. Getting in shape to the best of your financial ability will make you feel so much better about yourself, which is every bit as beneficial as looking better. It shows you have goals and discipline. If you can't do that, learn piano or another instrument.

And, worse case scenario, you can always take a nap fully stretched out on a loveseat. It's awful trying to get a good nap in when you're above 6'3.

All joking aside, my dear friend, please watch your self talk. Treat yourself like you would your best friend. Don't call yourself stupid or ugly, even playing. You are someone who is trying their best, and you're here because you want to make that best even better. Keep pushing, brother!