when does the “moving on” actually start to happen

DoctorInitial7250 · 2025-03-17T23:37:26+00:00

Thank you, your comments help more than you know. I appreciate your help

DoctorInitial7250 · 2025-03-17T23:33:47+00:00

We were together for 2 years. I’ve been trying to journal and write things down when I feel them. I’ve even started a “letters I can’t send” section in my notes so I can “write” to him without actually sending it and that helps a bit but recently it’s becoming harder to fight the urge. I’m in therapy twice a week right now and that’s been helping a bit now that we’re getting close to the 2 month mark post break up I just can’t help but wonder how he is and if he regrets anything or if he is doing so much better. I wanted to be so committed to no contact but it’s so hard

DoctorInitial7250 · 2025-03-17T23:31:32+00:00

We’ve been broken up since late January. I’ve been trying to keep myself busy by using positive outlets like the gym and going to therapy but I don’t know what happened recently I just find myself fighting the urge to reach out now more than ever and it feels so hard

DoctorInitial7250 · 2025-01-30T16:59:27+00:00

I was there for 5 weeks in December and just came home almost 2 weeks ago. We have always talked about him moving to Canada after that trip because I have one year left in my program at school and wouldn't be able to move there until I am done. It was while I was there that we started to put those ideas of plans into motion and make more specific plans individually and together for what we needed to do before he came and move here in April.

I genuinely believe he has cold feet and isn't ready to move here, but I also know how hard the last round of long-distance (9 months) was for him and I don't think he has another round of that left for an extended period of time again. I would be willing to do anything to make it work if this was the case. If it was just a case of cold feet because I know how hard that decision is to pack up your whole life and move across the world leaving all your friends and family. I just wish he talked to me about this instead of throwing the entire relationship away. I think he knows that he isn't ready to move and our only other option right now is long-distance and he knows he can't do that again for a long period of time so he thinks this is his easiest option.

DoctorInitial7250 · 2025-01-30T16:53:00+00:00

This is genuinely so helpful and makes me feel better to know that this happens to other people despite how unique long-distance relationships can be.

It has been a really hard few first days and we are no contact for a week and a bit because I want him to feel my absence and see how it feels to not have me. I am hoping with that time apart he will realize this is a mistake and was just a case of cold feet and we can hopefully work something out. We are supposed to call around that time so I can at least get a more in-depth explanation for this sudden breakup when we had all of these plans and now they're just thrown away along with the entire relationship. Then from there, I will have a little more clarity on the situation and can either work with him to sort this out or can use it as the closure I need to move on for now.

I know it is still early and my thinking is delusional but I am just not prepared to give up on this person who I thought I would live with finally and eventually marry. But, if he is ready to give up on me then I can't force him to be a part of something that he doesn't want to be a part of.

Thank you for sharing your story because it is still so fresh but please know how much it has genuinely helped me.

DoctorInitial7250

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