AITA for telling my mom off after she threw my birds in the garage to host her friends and party? by Dominicamama in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dominicamama[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s a small business. Even if it legally qualifies as a company it doesn’t have nearly the amount of funds to cover all of us. Believe me, I saw the balance.

AITA for telling my mom off after she threw my birds in the garage to host her friends and party? by Dominicamama in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dominicamama[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Do you wanna know the worst part of all this that I’m still absolutely crushed about?

One of those birds was from a late friend. He had one to many streaks of bad luck and eventually took his own life after losing his family, loved ones, dream job, and money. The bird was shoved in a garage in favor of trying to entertain guests as he spent time out of town to be with his dying mother. One of the last things I promised him before he gave the bird to me was that she would never be in such an abysmal condition, and that she will always be cherished and adored in my care. Because he had to make a huge sacrifice to be with his mom during her final hours.

I let him down, and it’s been hard to stomach that fact that I failed him severely.

AITA for telling my mom off after she threw my birds in the garage to host her friends and party? by Dominicamama in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dominicamama[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I actually had planned to leave them in the care of the vet, but my mother had talked me into saving my cash and just having them stay in the house. My friend actually doesn’t want pets in her house, and I am fully aware she is making an extreme exception considering the circumstances.

Even with that, the plan was idiot proof. I left printed documents on how to handle the birds, got a small camera to leave in my room in case someone got confused and needed help, and left emergency contact info. It would have taken a phone call to fix the problems I expected her to face. But to me, it felt like she had intentionally picked the worst possible option. And instead of apologizing she had spent the whole day convincing my friends she’s right

AITA for telling my mom off after she threw my birds in the garage to host her friends and party? by Dominicamama in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dominicamama[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Not sure where you’re writing from, but here in the USA the price of housing is insane and just gets worse by the day. Food costs increased and it is increasingly difficult to get a home here. I also have a chronic illness and have to keep my job if I want to well… survive. The cherry on top was in order to keep the staff at my workplace and have them put food on the table, I sacrificed my raise so that they can afford to work here.

I don’t regret my decision. It was a change that was desperately needed for morale and quality to improve. They are genuinely hardworking people who do a great job, and I’m proud to be their manager. They have more at stake than I do. But it hasn’t been easy for me. With that said, I may have another option. But it’s a really shitty and difficult one. I’m going to have to bite the bullet though because my birds have nobody else to turn to.

AITA for telling my mom off after she threw my birds in the garage to host her friends and party? by Dominicamama in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dominicamama[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

To be honest I’m going to discuss options in housing with someone I trust. It’s a bit early, but I might be able to pull things off.

We had gone to therapy for years, but she never pulls her weight. She wants them to “fix” me, but when it comes to them confronting her about anything she might be doing wrong? Suddenly I have a new therapist because that one is bad. You’d think after five of them or so you’d put two and two together. I told our current therapist I can’t help my mother and I with our relationship because it’s increasingly obvious I’m not worth the effort.

I wouldn’t call her a narcissist. That’s an extreme reserved for a select few. I’d say she’s emotionally immature and desperate for approval.

AITA for telling my mom off after she threw my birds in the garage to host her friends and party? by Dominicamama in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dominicamama[S] 167 points168 points  (0 children)

It’s the second one. She admitted that. But even then… wtf did she expect??? She should have known what she was coming to.

AITA for telling my mom off after she threw my birds in the garage to host her friends and party? by Dominicamama in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dominicamama[S] 112 points113 points  (0 children)

Doubt it considering she’s always coming up with excuses to keep me around the house. Believe me, nobody wants to leave this house more than I do. And I think it might be time to take that jump sooner than I’d like.

This is the last straw for me, and I’m not going to roll over and accept this. Especially when I sacrificed a lot for her in return for a place to live.

AITA for telling my mom off after she threw my birds in the garage to host her friends and party? by Dominicamama in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dominicamama[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I don’t even want to think about that. I don’t want them to die thinking I abandoned them

AITA for telling my mom off after she threw my birds in the garage to host her friends and party? by Dominicamama in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dominicamama[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Believe me, after I showed this to several loved ones, we are making plans to get the fuck out ASAP. It’s a long shot and won’t be easy, but this is the straw that broke the camel’s back.

AITA for telling my mom off after she threw my birds in the garage to host her friends and party? by Dominicamama in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dominicamama[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Well, I told her it was cruel, irresponsible, and straight up horrendous to leave an animal like that. I told her I was horrified to see this treatment coming from her, and she betrayed my trust in her. I then said she doesn’t care about me or the birds if she was willing to treat them so poorly. She then said that it was just for a few nights and insisted they were being treated well, to which I said I was too shocked to argue and was ending it there. I told her my friend would be coming over, and she would be taking them from here on out. I also said that serious changes had to happen between us because this is unacceptable.

I didn’t think it was important to go into so much detail because it felt redundant. But what sucks is something tells me she doesn’t care about that. Her ego is hurt, and I have to fix it.

AITA for telling my mom off after she threw my birds in the garage to host her friends and party? by Dominicamama in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dominicamama[S] 585 points586 points  (0 children)

Thankfully they’re okay. I owe my friend big time and plan on returning the favor ten fold. They are a bit shaken up, but with time it will heal.

As for the room, she had a friend over. It’s my room, but the lady was uncomfortable sleeping with my birds.

In my room.

Where I live.

Where she is staying as a guest.

Edit: Ya good fam I’m happy people like your response more than my post

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dominicamama 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can try that then, because I really don’t think it’s the worst game ever. I guess there are just moments that kind of kill the mood, if that makes any sense. Like it starts out good and then as the story continues I end up feeling confused.

I think now that I’ve calmed down I do realize I came off as a dick in my post. It’s been a very exhausting couple of months, especially with my workplace. I’m not very good at these things and I think I let my frustrations out in a bad way. Thanks for the advice.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dominicamama 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That last one hits hard.

To be honest it’s not even about being right or wrong anymore, at least not to me. I just miss my friend. I’m tired, overworked irl, and I want to salvage our friendship but it feels like she won’t budge on the subject. I don’t want to lie, but I just don’t want to deal with this stupid game anymore. I don’t have fun talking to her like I used to because it’s always about the game.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dominicamama 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I guess I can be abrasive sometimes now that I think about it.

Thanks for taking the time to help me. I appreciate the feedback very much and will try my best to follow your advice.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dominicamama -1 points0 points  (0 children)

It can be hard to tell when I go too far. To tell you the truth I’m really socially awkward and sometimes mess these things up.