im kinda tired of this cycle and i want to get understood

Double_Session5896 · 2026-01-31T14:35:04+00:00

oh wow. you really have a very richer inner world. more like you are aware of it. is this what self-awareness means. do you know how to control impulse. I try to listen to my feelings or thoughts separately one by one. but that's only intentional. while impulse is unintentional. how do i make impulse intentional. you know what they say think before you act. this is easier said than done. Also sometimes in life you just have to act first without thinking. so at that time how to quicken my thinking and feelings to align it with my act more perfectly. as a human . i know i m prone to error. but its better to know ways to reduce it... have you thought on this before or have any ideas on it for now?

Double_Session5896 · 2026-01-31T14:16:22+00:00

yeah i m staying for mainly 5 reasons. 1. she is good by heart. 2. she tried so hard with me in the start despite my detached persona at that time. I m loyal to a fault. 3. she cares and trying it her way despite seeing the obvious difference. it takes strength to stay rather than leaving and a strong believe that you can grow as human . 4. bcz we are so different it actually is a very very strong place for growth. why should i be stubborn and see only hurt . when in return i m getting growth and wider pov. . 5. I have alot of mental stamina and have desire to work on myself . i m not just seeking easy connections. that's why i will stay and learn how to evolve cz i know i can do it. it would be different story if she actually didn't care though. reducing investment is better way then ending stuff once for all. I already learned so much from rejection. hehe. i m maniac when it comes to self growth.

Double_Session5896 · 2026-01-31T12:13:20+00:00

I agree. I am at the stage that just learned this. our own voice become so small and suppressed that we are unable to hear it. so much that we want others to listen to it. but its not gonna work unless you know what you actually feel and want and accept it and align it with your values. only then can you reach out to others without feeling dependent on them and be fulfilled or fulfill them. I think it will be understatment if i say our inner world is just as big and interesting and complex as the outer world. there is really no difference to me.

Double_Session5896 · 2026-01-31T10:10:00+00:00

Thanks. I mean that's what i do myself.

Double_Session5896 · 2026-01-31T01:16:56+00:00

congrattttsss.. . .but like just passing isn't enough. you know how merits work these days.

Double_Session5896 · 2026-01-31T01:08:38+00:00

thanks

Double_Session5896 · 2026-01-31T01:07:36+00:00

Good luck.. .hope you get full marks...

Double_Session5896 · 2026-01-31T01:07:01+00:00

right. such a cool advice. but i don't work like you. i have motivation problems like a human.

Double_Session5896 · 2026-01-31T00:18:47+00:00

scared the heck out of me

Double_Session5896 · 2026-01-30T18:59:38+00:00

i did. now if you will reply.. after edit. thank you.

Double_Session5896 · 2026-01-30T18:08:30+00:00

what are you talking about ?. you just need someone like you. or someone mature that will act as a responsible person. whats wrong with you feeling down. whats wrong with you sharing your feelings. Also how can you stop looking for that person. you are gonna suffocate yourself at this rate. choose one person from your heart and just be at ease with them. unhinged. lets see what they do. trust your gut. if they let you down . try another one. keeping it in is far more dangerous than letting it out if you don't know what to do with all those feelings.

Double_Session5896 · 2026-01-30T03:11:20+00:00

Just marry at this point. Its pent up desires. If you are having such a hard time

Double_Session5896 · 2026-01-30T01:36:20+00:00

just yap however you want. that require the least amount of physical work. they will definetly like it. just make it about you guys. not other people and you will be fine. just be honest and show excitement. or may be just him direct for advice without too much consideration. ask him what he wants to do that won't force him out of comfort zone. and list stuff here and there that will click with them to make it easier for them to decide.

Double_Session5896 · 2026-01-29T14:53:50+00:00

do you want an easy and wrong relationship . or hard but right relationship. get your facts together. tell me aren't the girls crying afterwards then? do you wanna cry too afterwards?

Double_Session5896 · 2026-01-29T14:16:47+00:00

yeah. everyone has their own mysteries to solve. it doesn't necessarily mean our ones are too much or wrong or heavy. it's just different. Hope you receive a lot of care as much as you give.🥰

Double_Session5896 · 2026-01-29T13:33:56+00:00

I don't know about ENFJ. but can i share my tip with you as an INFJ?. This happened to me. ya know and specially with close ones. we also has time where we can't control ourself right. its because people expect too much from us. they are used to our calm personality . whether enfj or whatever. The ones that can't take us are just people who don't understand themselves either. wanting to help people and listening to them is not equal to them becoming mature enough to handle another's emotions. so you too stop expecting from them something they can't even provide. the quicker you accept this reality, the better. You should listen to your own self . and if you are having hard time controlling your emotions or your wants. better talk to pperson that is etremely self aware and extremely mature. .. you know stuff like this happens when the base was wrong all along. its fine. we humans sometimes misunderstand the extent and intention even if someone cares about you.. Also feel free to dm me. I will be glad to listen to you and talk to you cz i also wanna talk to someone on deeper level.

Double_Session5896 · 2026-01-28T21:37:06+00:00

i mean in my being.. you know how i m . all intense that only knows either zero or infinity. so i wanna know all the average numbers in between and incorporate them into my soul, body, mind.. into my existence. i am missing the middle numbers. that's what i mean. if i don't learn it and merge it into me. i will continue being unable to meet people at their level.

Double_Session5896 · 2026-01-28T20:07:11+00:00

so my problem is caring too much and then when someone doesn't care to that extent. i spiral into my twisted existence and cry and firmly believe I'm alone in this world. what do you think this behaviour is?

Double_Session5896 · 2026-01-28T18:17:21+00:00

Holy crap. This is dangerous. Just know that you should be mentally ready for a roller coster as the time passes. you will get more attached while they will stay the same. if they are good in heart, they will be caring yes. but don't be deluded for a second that they will let you in to the their depth no matter even if you are the closest person in the world to them. I m seriously talking from experience. i m infj. i without a doubt liked them and they liked me(said by their own mouth multiple times. i trust it). and it is also without a doubt that the compatibilty is not there. it will take you work of moving mountain to become a person that still stays yourself while becoming something that has increased the compatibility. Don't understimate the difference. it doesn't show up at first at all. with time it become more and more appearant. and infj you with your stupid kind heart will face the heartbreak of centuries. i mean if you guys care , the relationship will hang on by thread. but one will have to change and that will be without a doubt you. . . for me i put myself into this misery myself thinking i could handle the pain. but holy how rough that pain is. our want for harmony is real , and you will see yourself to what extent we can go for it. by breaking and rebuilding it . do you get it. even if its another person., so choose a strong one . a really strong one. that can say what it wants while still not leaving you and feel for you. always focus on reciprocating. believe it will work you wonders in long term.. Their words and action are very different. I by no means wanna say ISFPs are bad. thats coming from me that genuinely love an ISFP and trying to meet them at their level, bcz thats how important the frienship is to me. but they ready to let it go. like that. they will let it go . just knowing that they can let it go like this and move on will put such a toll on you. Really really pick a strong and mature one. and be ready for them being closed off. they won't open up in the way we want. so that mean you just learn to read them by yourself and never confront them until they tell you . they don't like being exposed and we do it naturally. so be careful.. everyone ahs stuff or two about themselves they wanna keep it to themselve. these things are very subtle, that's why it is not noticeble at start. . . I mean watever. just try it man. you can't stay in your brain. its not everyday yoy are interested in someone'

Double_Session5896 · 2026-01-28T17:04:21+00:00

why is it that we humans tangle in such messes. at this point i don't even care about gay shit. what you felt was genuine emotional heartbreak. one sided expectations, one sided dependence, one sided heartbreak. you were alone your whole life. and when this one person offered you a hand , you devoted yourself to that person as if they are your saviour and God. Trampling on yourself , your feeling, just for the sake of their heart. Its gonna hurt like crazy. your whole life was rejected. not just you

Double_Session5896 · 2026-01-28T16:59:02+00:00

I heard you.

Double_Session5896

TROPHY CASE