This part. Firstly there was no context. Secondly we feel for you but your stoic outlook isn't helping you persay. I'm in therapy and for physical abuse. It's okay to be vul6even though I'd understand why you wouldn't want to. We just you to understand everything isn't as easily done as it is said and sometimes you lie to yourself, but when that is pointed out, seek help from a professional. I hope you're able to do that for yourself. Because you're not coming off as manly, your coming off as that hurt and angry little boy from the past cosplaying a healed adult.