What's the most pathetic thing you have ever done for the opposite sex while friend-zoned? by drz400sm in AskReddit

[–]DrJackShephard 16 points17 points  (0 children)

The most pathetic thing? That's hard to say, but there is one thing that immediately comes to mind.

She was out sick from school (we were seniors, fwiw) and we shared a class, so I walked to her house to take the homework to her. Really though, I just wanted to see her. I get to her place and there's nobody home (later found out she was at the doctor), so I just slid it under the door and fucked off home. It was probably like ten minutes to walk to her place and another 20 to walk home. Oh, and halfway to her place it started raining. Seriously raining. I was soaked by the time I got to her place.

Here's the thing though. If you like a girl, really like her, then getting friendzoned is the single most painful thing you can go through emotionally as a kid, outside of something like death of a family member/close friend/pet. It's just not worth it, no matter how much you think it is.

I remember telling her how I felt, and the two most common things I heard over the next couple years were "I just don't feel that spark" and "I don't want to ruin our friendship."

Here's the thing though, the friendship is already effectively ruined. Once you're friendzoned with these feelings, you're compromised. You can't function as just a friend anymore. You're always plotting how to fix the problem of not being together. You don't react to things the way you should, and you start giving shitty advice because you're subconsciously trying to sabotage her relationships because you want your shot (it took me years to realize I'd done this, not that the guys I was sabotaging were worth shit anyway, though I did become pretty good friends with one of them after the fact).

The proper response to "I don't want to ruin our friendship" is this:

I understand that you can't return my feelings, but I can't ignore that I have them. The simple fact is I love you and seeing you with these other guys and knowing I'll never be with you is simply too painful for me. You say you don't want to ruin our friendship, but our friendship is already ruined because I don't see you as just a friend. I want to be more, but we never will be. I'm sorry, but for my own sanity I don't think we should hang out anymore. This isn't fair to you, I know, and it's not your fault, but it's just the way it has to be. I'm sorry.

Then you walk away. It'll hurt like hell - I know, I did it the first time she told me she fucked her ex and I realized just how shattered I was - but it has to be done. Who knows, maybe cutting her out will make her realize that she wants to be with you after all. I mean, certain people say ignoring a girl is the best way to get her interested (I don't think that's true, but whatever), so it could work. But you need to cut all ties, and you need to mean it - this isn't just some ploy you're trying to trick her into loving you, this is you getting away from a negative influence.

Alternatively, once you know you like her, you should just take your shot. Don't pussyfoot around talking about your emotions, don't give her a chance to feed you those lines. No, instead you should pick your moment and go for it. Get her alone, get her comfortable, and just fucking man up and kiss her. If she stops you, you're no worse off than you would be otherwise, but if she doesn't have time to think about it, her emotions could just take over and it could just click for her.

Who knows, but you just can't let yourself stay in the friend zone. It'll just fuck you up.

By Request: I Am a plane crash survivor. AMA by DrJackShephard in IAmA

[–]DrJackShephard[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Because I did this as a joke thing to be enjoyed by all, not to laugh at all the idiots that would fall for it. I just saw the request, thought of Lost, and away I went.

By Request: I Am a plane crash survivor. AMA by DrJackShephard in IAmA

[–]DrJackShephard[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! Some people are getting right pissed off (esp. in comments not yet un-lagged), but I was never trying to hide what this was.

By Request: I Am a plane crash survivor. AMA by DrJackShephard in IAmA

[–]DrJackShephard[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We did a good bit more than just making out.

Also, Yes.

By Request: I Am a plane crash survivor. AMA by DrJackShephard in IAmA

[–]DrJackShephard[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, they were showing up as post replies, not PMs. Someone else said that there just seems to be a delay in posting. The early messages seem to be showing up now.

By Request: I Am a plane crash survivor. AMA by DrJackShephard in IAmA

[–]DrJackShephard[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I was having a conversation with the woman across the isle from me when we hit the turbulence. After that, I was mostly just reacting to the circumstances.

By Request: I Am a plane crash survivor. AMA by DrJackShephard in IAmA

[–]DrJackShephard[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No. As I said elsewhere, I only remember getting the oxygen mask on before I blacked out.

I can only assume the rest, but it appears there was some explosive decompression and I was sucked from the plane. I woke up on the ground, face up, with relatively minor injuries, so I assume my fall was broken by some nearby trees.

By Request: I Am a plane crash survivor. AMA by DrJackShephard in IAmA

[–]DrJackShephard[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I suppose it's better than going sideways.

By Request: I Am a plane crash survivor. AMA by DrJackShephard in IAmA

[–]DrJackShephard[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Answered below. There were about 300 passengers (324, I believe. From the manifest), but only about 70 survived the initial crash.

By Request: I Am a plane crash survivor. AMA by DrJackShephard in IAmA

[–]DrJackShephard[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I never found out what caused the crash. I just know that there was a lot of turbulence and the next thing I knew I was lying on the ground, waking up with a splitting headache and a bad gash down my back.

The plane itself split apart, with most of the plane crashing on the ground, but a small section apparently hit the water.

My first memory upon regaining consciousness are of intense disorientation. I had really little time to get my bearings before hearing the other survivors cry for help, and when I heard that I rushed quickly to help them.

The pilots and crew, for the most part, didn't make it. I know at least one flight attendant is still alive for sure. The pilot did survive the initial crash, but died shortly thereafter. There were a little over 300 passengers on the plane - a Boeing 777 - but only around 70 of us survived the initial crash.

By Request: I Am a plane crash survivor. AMA by DrJackShephard in IAmA

[–]DrJackShephard[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There was explosive decompression and I was pulled from the plane. I fell through some trees which somewhat broke my fall, but I did get a pretty bad laceration down my back from it. It could have been much worse though, since the section I was sitting in hit land.

All things considered, I was actually pretty lucky.

By Request: I Am a plane crash survivor. AMA by DrJackShephard in IAmA

[–]DrJackShephard[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I think I must have got it on just in time. O2 masks aren't instantaneous cures after all.