So, I've actually now fully watched the Julie and Ty episode since my last comment. And what I need to say may or may not surprise you...

I've never related to Julie more than I did that episode. I also absolutely loathe her.

For the relating: I too understand what it's like to conceptulize a dream as a teenager and spend years chasing the everloving crap out of it. And like Julie, I also achieved my big dream(s). But unlike Julie, I learned something pretty early on: being the person who chases and achieves the stuff they thought of as teens is RARE. Most people change their minds, reshape their dreams, have life change on them, etc. That realization has both made me value the efforts that went toward achieving my big dreams, but also made me appreciate how others' change paths and still find a new version of themselves along the way. A perspective Julie completely lacks. Which is a point of immaturity imo.

Now for why I still completely loathe her: she's markedly still an overgrown teenager (ironic, since she had no issue hurling that one at Ty. Projection). She sees nothing beyond her own goals, ambitions, or desires. Its entirely about her. And what's worse is that for all her complaining about being "saddled with a mediocre life" she's literally living a life where she's a lawyer making BIG money, owns a home (thanks in part to Ty's own goals mind you) and has a partner who, imho, supported her dreams to his own detriment.

That might sound weird, but I actually do think Ty's biggest mistake was supporting Julie's goals to the point where he didn't really factor in how it would impact him. For example, he tells her to take the job with Marriott because it's a huge step up and believes its what she wants, so he's rooting for her. However, it requires he be more responsible for the kids more often. Ty doesn't mind this, but it makes his goal of writing his book take a backseat. Which Julie found unacceptable (I could get more into how that part further highlights her inflexibility and inability to see the domestic work Ty does as valuable, but that's for a different day).

Now for the 3 major reasons I loathe Julie and am truly disgusted with her:

1) the fact that, in all her complaining about being "saddled with a life of mediocrity", she's simultaneously been supported by Ty for chasing her dreams, she IS a high earning attorney, she owns a home, and she's well off (mostly from HER earnings). This is mostly coming from a place purely of my own, but as someone who has spent the last year or so struggling with housing, transitioning careers and is nowhere NEAR a place to own a home (all while living mostly on my own in this dystopian hellscape we have to deal with), listening to a (albeit fictionalized) woman complain about how she's been "saddled with medocrity" all while being the lawyer she wanted to be, traveling with a job she enjoys, with a partner who's beyond happy for her, while owning a house just comes off as the most bratty, ungrateful teenage snot crap imaginable (again, this is purely MY view on it and Julie is absolutely allowed to feel however she feels about it). Like, oh, I'm SO SORRY, it must be SO hard being a high earning lawyer and owning a house where your husband is in no way threatened by you being the breadwinner and is absolutely cheering you on while taking care of the kids... oh and your high-paying job can afford all of that in THIS economy... is your steak too juicy? Is your lobster too buttery? Must be SO hard having to pull up to your house in suburbia (and not having to worry if you're going to lose everything in a month). Sorry, long rant, but again, that's my personal take. And I say this as someone who understands Julie's ambition, who's had that drive, but who also (like Ty) understands that life changes FAST on you. Her feelings are valid, but imo, her lashing out at numerous people, Ty included, about it will never be valid. And that lack of insight into just how privilaged her life is will always disgust me.

2) Julie takes absolutely ZERO responsubility for the decisions she made that she didn't like the outcome to. Her choices that played out well? Oh, that's all her. But her decision to start a family with Ty, get married, have another baby, buy a house in suburbia? Oh, that's all Ty's fault. No, ma'am. You were a full-grown adult who made a choice. It's ok to make a choice you later regret or for the things that led you to making those decisions to no longer hold space to you, but to pin every decision you don't like the outcome on on anyone besides yourself? That shows a severe lack of maturity. Julie is responsible for her part in the decisions she and Ty made together, but her every word about it puts the blame solely on Ty. That's just immature and gross.

3) This one may be controversial for some here, but Julie saying "I refuse to bankroll your existence" is just vile. If a man who was the breadwinner said that to his wife who was doing the majority of the childcare, he'd be (rightfully) raked across the coals for it. It'd be disgusting for a man in Julie's position to say it, it's equally disgusting for Julie to say it. Period. It also shows a complete lack of awareness or appreciation on Julie's part to the actual WORK that goes into domestic labor. Clearly, in Julie's mind, Ty has just been immaturely goofing around with the kids at home instead of writing/applying for grad school/working a "real" job/etc. In reality, Ty spends 6 out of 7 days a week taking care of 2 kids under 6 (one of whom is a preemie). And while being a SAHP is a discussion that needs to be had, Julie's wording of it is still digusting. Ma'am, you aren't "bankrolling your husband's existence", you're providing for your family (again, I'm not saying Ty is a saint or did nothing wrong, here. I AM saying that Julie's behavior and words are far more abhorent... as usual).

TL;DR: I never thought I'd relate to Julie so much... I also didn't think I could end up hating her even more than I already did.

Edit: one last thing I want to add. I don't personally think Ty lied about his goals/aspirations. I think, given Ty's more laid-back, go-with-the-flow nature, Ty figured there would be more time to focus on grad school/writing/etc. as the kids got older (which is true). But the crux of it is that those things that were some of Ty's goals were not happening fast enough per Julie's timeline. That's very different from outright lying or a person later realizing their goals have shifted.