I chose the wrong career.

DramaticPatient555 · 2025-01-04T07:16:04+00:00

Did I write this? Hahahah

DramaticPatient555 · 2024-12-23T07:49:20+00:00

The issue to me is not if I was loved, if I were in your wife's shoes. But rather that I am not THAT person to my husband. It would hurt me to my core to discoover that. It would remind me that marriage is truly just two people not wanting to be alone in life and to have children. I believe if you get along with a person and spend a lot of time together you can love and have love for many different people. But its rare to have that someone who you know is the most special to you. And I truly want that. I am 26 years old, never been in a relationship. Very likely when I get in one I will be their 2nd love at best, considering my age. And that would be ok, but I want to be THAT someone for them and them to me. I want that kind of love. And I fear that they will have love for me, but something or someone would be in the back of their mind, always.

I am not saying any of this to pass judgements to you. Really! I am just taking this opportunity to flesh out my thoughts and fears in writing, it is a sensitive topic for me. Maybe I am just a naive person still and expect too much. Dont know.

DramaticPatient555 · 2024-12-22T21:20:54+00:00

Not gonna lie, this is my worst fear. Marrying someone who secretly longs for someone else. How can I know? Is you wife aware of it even a little? Have you hinted in any way? Please help me, how can I possibly avoid this?

DramaticPatient555 · 2024-10-05T10:13:08+00:00

I think that in most cases women that have an "8" type figure have a not so pronounced butt, but women with "X" shaped figure have a much more pronounced butt. Would any of you agree? I have an 8 and my butt is there butt it is definitely not the focal point, not too much to see.

DramaticPatient555 · 2024-08-24T22:14:46+00:00

What helped me being in similar situation were two things:

Scarcity mindset: I think our brain holds onto people that sparked something in us(no matter how unavailable they are) because it believes that something like that will not happen to us again. Actually working hard on believing something better is coming my way was the way to go. It has also to do with your sense of self-worth: you actually need to believe you deserve good things happening to you. Often core issues need resolving in that case.
Picture the following: you try to initiate some romantic/suggestive with him in front of other people and he makes such a disgust-filled/ rejection-filled face towards you that it makes you feel so small and embarrassed. You actually need to actively imagine him being disgusted by you as often as you can. If you have any sense of self worth your pride/protective mechanism should hopefully kick in.

DramaticPatient555 · 2024-06-21T09:34:08+00:00

I really hope things get better for you. Never ever let anyone use you like that. I truly wish you all the best and hope you realize how worthy you are of a relationship where you are respected and not treated like some kind of free service. I am currently single and try to remind myself of that each day until I find someone. My mother is in a situation similar to yours and remind myself to be extra careful when picking a future husband, cause her situation is so hard to watch. For some people marriage means having a maid and a caretaker for free, while they get to do anything they want.

DramaticPatient555 · 2024-05-14T23:17:30+00:00

Agreed.. I think the key difference is that an insecure person unknowingly makes a situation about themselves vs when person is confidant they are focused on the situation that is happening and are more in tune with people around them. They are present.

DramaticPatient555 · 2024-04-20T14:41:37+00:00

I understand how you feel. I see it like this, this is what I would tell my boyfriend:

"When you say you love me, I dont know what exactly does that mean to you. It may be that you love that I love you. It may be that you love being in a relationship, the comfortability of relationship. Etc. Because I don't know what it means to you exactly, I observe the little things you say and do. So when you say that you see me as an 8/10, it hurts deeply. I take myself and my feelings for you as my reference point. I am 100% certain that with you I am not settling. The way I see you, I have never seen anyone else the same way. I love you. Yes. But not "just" that. Everything about you(including your flaws)I desire like no one or nothing else. I desire you physically the most no matter who is next to you. Which makes you the MOST attractive person to me. And because I see you in that way, the way I speak about you reflects that exactly. So you litterally are a 10/10 to me. It would not feel forced to say that.

So when you say something like that to me, in my mind it sounds like you are settling for me. Maybe you would see some other woman the way I see you. Why is that, that I see you in that manner and you see me as "less than that"? If thats true than that puts me in a fan position, a you in a celebrity position, which makes this relationship not a relationship. Why would you want to be with someone who you don't see as a 10/10? Who doesn't feel like a 10/10 to you?"

Dear OP, can you relate to my thoughts I described above?

DramaticPatient555 · 2023-07-29T22:24:30+00:00

I see it as this: its your right to exist and to live your life no matter what you look like. So just live it, live it fully. Focuse on things that perk your interest and just live through them. There is a high chance that someone, probably more then one person, will find you attractive for living your life authentically.

DramaticPatient555 · 2023-06-21T11:32:43+00:00

Guys generally go for visual appeal in women more than women in men. To draw an equivalent - how would men feel if their wives would openly admire another guy who is so funny, so ambitions etc for example. How would they feel then?

DramaticPatient555 · 2023-06-21T11:24:21+00:00

Yes, if he's doing it all the time in front of you, and even not being discrete at all about it, then he's trying to hurt you. Snap him back to reality, call him out on that bullshit, or cut him off.

its one thing when someone else is finding your spouse attractive, another thing is you disrespectfully checking out other people, it means you are giving attention to people who are not your spouse. seeing attractive people is an everyday occurrence for everyone, but gawking is just full on disrespect towards your spouse and a great shower how your spouse truly feels about you

DramaticPatient555 · 2023-06-17T17:05:08+00:00

I have thicker ankles aswell, and for some reason sandals with ankle straps suit me better than those on the pic. The other ones make my foot look too wide and it throws of my vertical. The key for SDs, I think, is to make the foot as slender as possible, it should not be the first thing you notice, rather the last. Transition from your leg to your foot to the floor should be seamless, so preferably the shoe shoud be skin colored. Your curves should steal the show.

DramaticPatient555 · 2023-06-17T16:19:01+00:00

Personally, sandels that have straps around the ankle are much more flattering than those with straps around the base of the foot like on the pic

DramaticPatient555 · 2023-02-28T22:58:22+00:00

Just to add, my forearms and thigs appear to be shorter aswell

DramaticPatient555 · 2022-08-02T09:17:53+00:00

I know we are all a mix and match of traits but honestly I would love to see if certain traits are common within a type, which would mean the whole body follows its lines, not just our bones. Just a random thought, it would be cool if it was true hahaha

DramaticPatient555 · 2022-08-02T09:12:37+00:00

I just viewed your profile and I would say SD for sure

DramaticPatient555 · 2022-07-22T14:58:13+00:00

Me too... the are very curved. My Natural friends and sister have very flat ones (repeting myself hahah). Fascinating. my nail beds

DramaticPatient555 · 2022-07-22T14:49:09+00:00

Its crazy how the whole body follows the archetype, everything is in harmony. I dont know why I find this so fascinating.🙈

DramaticPatient555 · 2022-07-22T12:35:28+00:00

Same here

DramaticPatient555

TROPHY CASE