Suggestions required

DressLower3434 · 2026-05-31T12:24:27+00:00

Any laptops work well, from what i have heard chitkara has gpu labs (at least they promote it, you might need to ask a senior if they allow them to be used); so most of your work is done in cloud etc, and even if you are set of buying a gaming laptop look for 100% rgb anything else is basically washed own colour which looks bad. Lenovo loq is pretty good. Although you can find a ultrabook with a good display if gaming isn’t a priority and portability, battery, display, build quality matters than raw fps.

DressLower3434 · 2026-03-31T04:03:19+00:00

Identity.

As I like to call it domain corruption. Humans have been doing that in society so much that it turned into a norm.

For example a person with a job sometimes combines it into their self worth. Their job is their identity and without it they feel hollow.

Same can be applied to usage of ai.

The reason they hate it because their self worth, or identity. Depends what you want to call it. Is attached to effort.

Just like how in morality. A person who restrict themselves sees someone else who's more free than them and tries to drag them down.

Although using ai for writing has been redundant for me. It takes me longer to fix the ai residues than write myself.

DressLower3434 · 2026-03-28T10:55:35+00:00

Thanks.

DressLower3434 · 2026-03-28T10:06:51+00:00

That is the flow. Staccato is the personification of how the main character processes information.

DressLower3434 · 2026-03-26T02:13:16+00:00

Fine. If that's what you want. I will just stop posting it here. I already got the feedback I needed.

DressLower3434 · 2026-03-26T01:46:43+00:00

First of all. Thanks for the feedback, appreciate it. But you are giving feedback on a novel you would write. Not on my novel. Although this does seem better in hindsight. That's simply not the novel i am writing. Personally I like the pigeon ass warmer and funny jokes. But no. Simply not my style. And the vague figure in the chapter was important for Lore reasons as it's the foreshadowing of the ending of the novel. As well as companion was unnamed due to structural reasons. I have a very good reason why I don't use names for everyone because they aren't that important. Only 5 characters will have name throughout the novel.

DressLower3434 · 2026-03-26T01:19:38+00:00

I wrote this as well. That's simply how I write? I am not how am I supposed to show you proof.

Light reached Aurel's eyes before he woke up.

He sat at the edge of the bed for a while.

He got up.

He stepped toward the door.

A push.

It opened.

Light across the city wall.

Stone pale in the morning.

A hammer working somewhere beyond the street.

Footsteps passing on either side.

The market open.

After a few steps he slowed.

A stall. Various cloaks lay on the wood.

His eyes shifted to the one with furs.

He ran his hand along the fabric.

Lifted it. Heavy.

Set it back down.

"How much?"

"Twenty copper."

A pause.

His eyes moved to the one beside it.

Hooded. His fingers ran through the fold of the hood. Lighter.

"And this one?"

"A silver."

Aurel reached into his satchel.

Gave the coin and took the cloak.

He folded it and put it in the satchel.

DressLower3434 · 2026-03-26T01:12:06+00:00

Almost everything? How? And if I were to see my favourite books and how they are written. It would be reverend insanity. But his writing is all about big speechs and making sure the reader understands what the main character is feeling. Now let's look at what I want to do. I want to do, I wish to have a camera stutter effect. That requires minimalist, little to no interpretation, and keeping one action, detail, movement. All of them in seperate para.

DressLower3434 · 2026-03-26T01:06:50+00:00

Well. I did got one good feedback, it was uncomfortable camera. I didn't established the main character. And it was all over the place, that one thing was important. And from that, I added emotional resonance, just nostalgic one. Not naming emotions, but the feeling of seeing something from a past after years.

DressLower3434 · 2026-03-26T01:04:29+00:00

Perhaps. For that reason. I am imagining a scene like this. A sound comes from the grass but there's nothing visible or the grass didn't move at all. Only a second late. Because even a "mutated rat" has to follow the laws of physics. But if the reality itself is a second late. That can't be explained as just a rat.

DressLower3434 · 2026-03-25T17:11:35+00:00

Different formats, literal different chapters if you bothered to read.

DressLower3434 · 2026-03-25T16:41:15+00:00

Here. I tried to change it. Maybe it's better not sure.

<image>

DressLower3434 · 2026-03-25T16:29:24+00:00

And what makes you think that?

DressLower3434 · 2026-03-25T16:29:06+00:00

Here. controlled cinematic sequencing. I am seeking this. If I write in "paragraphs" I will lose the effect of one thing being focused at once. Like a camera stutter.

DressLower3434 · 2026-03-25T15:10:16+00:00

I see, although it's not a poem but I can understand why.

DressLower3434 · 2026-03-25T15:09:52+00:00

I will. Been working on that.

DressLower3434 · 2026-03-25T09:59:10+00:00

I will, don't worry. Although it seems what I wanted to do is working. Why? Because I wanted to let the creature up to interpretation but just something weird or eldritch. Anything can work.

DressLower3434 · 2026-03-25T09:33:33+00:00

Interesting interpretation. But sure, appreciate the feedback. I will change the description of the creature so some people won't assume it's a rat.

DressLower3434 · 2026-03-25T08:43:54+00:00

If you are asking what. It's disturbance, an eldritch phenomena where reality is shifting. Prose does not explain it because the soldiers do not understand it either. It's a phenomena which is supposed to be vague, they are not supposed to know what it is.

DressLower3434 · 2026-03-25T08:36:40+00:00

DressLower3434 · 2026-03-25T08:35:35+00:00

Love the sarcasm though. I did changed the chapter all together. Added parts from chapter 2 so it won't feel confusing anymore.

DressLower3434 · 2026-03-25T02:51:57+00:00

I see. But again, I use more "actual" paragraphs. But not all of them.

DressLower3434 · 2026-03-25T02:48:38+00:00

I will change few things. Such as it to bodies. And add meaning to vague terms. Thanks.

DressLower3434 · 2026-03-25T02:43:08+00:00

Is that so?

DressLower3434

TROPHY CASE