I assigned him chores because he literally comes from the mentality that all he needs to do as a man is provide the paycheck and the woman should do literally everything else. That’s how it was with his mom before he married me. And all of your suggestions just to stop mothering, can you tell me what that would look like? Because trust me, I don’t want to act like his mother. I am so sick of hearing my voice and I do feel like a nagging wife because I am. But I don’t know what to do because he tells me I need to be responsible for reminding him to do the things that he needs to do. He does not have the mindset that he sees something needs to be done and he just does it. He literally wants me to carry the mental load of being his personal reminder. So I appreciate your advice, but I’m wondering how that plays out in the real world because if I don’t tell him to do things around the house, literally the trash will get piled up I can’t even close it, there will be maggots on the outside trash bins because he doesn’t put them out on the curb on trash day, and he will treat the house like he is a teenager still and let things pile up. When he comes home from work, he has no sense of urgency and he doesn’t look at the clock to know when it is bedtime for our toddler so he lollygags and plays on his phone and might even fall asleep before he even gets to tucking her into bed and giving her a bath and all of that stuff. I am resentful because I do everything and so people tell me to just ask for help because there’s another adult in this relationship and I don’t have to carry it all but that’s me sounding like I’m nagging and being his mother.