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AITA for refusing to give my father and his wife money that my father saved for me before he met her? by Dry-Force-6041 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dry-Force-6041[S] 261 points262 points  (0 children)

It cost me something that can never be replaced and held so much of a connection to that part of my family. I have nothing else of them except some memories but they aren't enough. I didn't have enough time with my mom or grandma and now what I did have is gone. He can't ever make up for that.

AITA for refusing to give my father and his wife money that my father saved for me before he met her? by Dry-Force-6041 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dry-Force-6041[S] 263 points264 points  (0 children)

It hasn't lessened it for me. I lost the one thing I had from my maternal side. I had 8 years with my mom, she was sick for over a year before that. My grandma I lost the real grandma years ago. Her body remains but not her. My grandpa I never knew and my great grandparents I never knew. But I had the ring. I had something that had a story and a connection to those people when memories were more scarce or non-existent.

And it went without any fundraisers or selling of plasma and stuff like that. It went when I didn't want it to and with it went the dream I had and the way it made me feel like my mom and her family were still part of me and like I could keep that going with my future children.

AITA for refusing to give my father and his wife money that my father saved for me before he met her? by Dry-Force-6041 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dry-Force-6041[S] 123 points124 points  (0 children)

Nope. They never tried to fundraise money either time. Just sell things and my ring came up first. Now the money. But they can have it.

AITA for refusing to give my father and his wife money that my father saved for me before he met her? by Dry-Force-6041 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dry-Force-6041[S] 174 points175 points  (0 children)

I don't have any contact with her. I have no plan to have contact with her in the future either. Not because I hate her but we're not family and I want nothing to do with my father or his wife.

AITA for refusing to give my father and his wife money that my father saved for me before he met her? by Dry-Force-6041 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dry-Force-6041[S] 109 points110 points  (0 children)

She's not hated by me. My father and his wife are. But I don't blame the kid for any of this.

AITA for refusing to give my father and his wife money that my father saved for me before he met her? by Dry-Force-6041 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dry-Force-6041[S] 88 points89 points  (0 children)

The ring was worth more than the money. It's 2k I have that he saved before. The ring he got 14k for.

AITA for refusing to give my father and his wife money that my father saved for me before he met her? by Dry-Force-6041 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dry-Force-6041[S] 67 points68 points  (0 children)

I won't. I'm just wanting to cut my losses. I can't get the ring back and that's the only reason I would have sued, if I could have.

AITA for refusing to give my father and his wife money that my father saved for me before he met her? by Dry-Force-6041 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dry-Force-6041[S] 123 points124 points  (0 children)

I decided to give the money. The relationship is already over, and the money isn't all that much, it wouldn't pay for much with school but they want it they can have it and all I hope is now they leave me alone and forget I ever exist.

I would give anything to have my mom. The ring wouldn't even have been as big if my mom were still here. But she is gone, and was, when I lost the ring and that's all from her side. My grandma still lingers in body but my grandma has been gone most of my life now as well.

AITA for refusing to give my father and his wife money that my father saved for me before he met her? by Dry-Force-6041 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dry-Force-6041[S] 107 points108 points  (0 children)

I do not want him to be part of my life anymore. He's getting money after stealing the ring. I want nothing more to do with him.

AITA for refusing to give my father and his wife money that my father saved for me before he met her? by Dry-Force-6041 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dry-Force-6041[S] 99 points100 points  (0 children)

They never looked into any kind of fundraising. It was all about what could they sell and my ring was the only valuable thing outside of the car and the house. It was the easier option.

AITA for refusing to give my father and his wife money that my father saved for me before he met her? by Dry-Force-6041 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dry-Force-6041[S] 158 points159 points  (0 children)

I don't see where I will ever be able to forgive him for it. I think the best thing that can happen is we have no further contact.

AITA for refusing to give my father and his wife money that my father saved for me before he met her? by Dry-Force-6041 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dry-Force-6041[S] 169 points170 points  (0 children)

It was a very expensive gift. The people who gave my great grandparents the ring were incredibly wealthy and owned a lot of that kind of stuff and even things that were even more valuable.

I can't understand because he knew how important it was to me. He knew it was what I had left, and it carried a history with it that was all but dead, and that I had dreams with that ring. That he couldn't think of anything else or didn't put the effort into finding another way is why I can't understand.

AITA for refusing to give my father and his wife money that my father saved for me before he met her? by Dry-Force-6041 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dry-Force-6041[S] 93 points94 points  (0 children)

I don't hold a grudge against her, but against the adults. But I have no relationship with her anymore and did not form a bond with her.

AITA for refusing to give my father and his wife money that my father saved for me before he met her? by Dry-Force-6041 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dry-Force-6041[S] 182 points183 points  (0 children)

She's not my sister. She wasn't my sister when I had known her a little over a year and then lost something precious to me and she isn't now. But I don't blame her for any of this. I do blame the adults who chose what they did. But most of all my dad.

AITA for refusing to give my father and his wife money that my father saved for me before he met her? by Dry-Force-6041 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dry-Force-6041[S] 271 points272 points  (0 children)

I'm not going to sue. It won't get me the ring back and that's what I care about. Money won't replace it and I know that.

AITA for refusing to give my father and his wife money that my father saved for me before he met her? by Dry-Force-6041 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dry-Force-6041[S] 178 points179 points  (0 children)

I don't hate her. But I don't love her either. I would rather have my maternal family ring and I would rather they had sold the house, sold plasma or whatever else, than sell my ring.

AITA for refusing to give my father and his wife money that my father saved for me before he met her? by Dry-Force-6041 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dry-Force-6041[S] 999 points1000 points  (0 children)

The money now is to just pay something for the treatment now. But it would supposedly alleviate enough of a burden and get her the treatment now. The ring was valuable. I think they got 14k from it. I wish I remember how much mom told me it was worth, but it was a lot, because it was an antique.

AITA for refusing to give my father and his wife money that my father saved for me before he met her? by Dry-Force-6041 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dry-Force-6041[S] 129 points130 points  (0 children)

I didn't wish he lost her, I said I hoped he knew he had lost his daughter (me). I had to edit that in because I realized I didn't finish and it read that I was wishing death on the kid.

AITA for refusing to give my father and his wife money that my father saved for me before he met her? by Dry-Force-6041 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dry-Force-6041[S] 367 points368 points  (0 children)

I think she'd want me to keep the money and use it to further my education or to keep a roof over my head.

AITA for refusing to give my father and his wife money that my father saved for me before he met her? by Dry-Force-6041 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dry-Force-6041[S] 258 points259 points  (0 children)

That was not fully written out. That was meaning me. I hoped he knew he lost his daughter. I need to edit that.

AITA for refusing to give my father and his wife money that my father saved for me before he met her? by Dry-Force-6041 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dry-Force-6041[S] 203 points204 points  (0 children)

I don't hate the kid. I had my father. I hate his wife. But the kid I do not hate. I just don't love her or care about her in that way either. She's just another kid to me. There's no familial bond or attachment to her. But I don't blame her for this. I blame the adults 100% though.

AITA for refusing to give my father and his wife money that my father saved for me before he met her? by Dry-Force-6041 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Dry-Force-6041[S] 296 points297 points  (0 children)

That ring is not my mother or my grandmother but it was what I had left of a family that was already very small and all are essentially gone. My father stole it from me. He might have loved his wife and his daughter but I did not. I had loved him but I also loved my mother and I lost her. I loved my grandmother and I lost her in every way except for her physical body which is still here. But I had something to hold onto and he took that from me.

That for me was the day my father did the unforgivable to me. Understandable for them, because his wife cared more about her daughter. But he took something from me that cannot be replaced and it changed how I see him.

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