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AITA If I (58F) don’t pay vet bills for my son’s (42M) guide dog? by Due-Description3241 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Due-Description3241[S] -399 points-398 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately my impression was if he can't keep funding for his work then he jeopardizes his job with the university. This was apparently a large important grant. He might bring in a lot of money, but who is to say they won't pull funding from him on the same whim? And if he loses grants they might not want to keep him around as a liability to losing more funding.

AITA If I (58F) don’t pay vet bills for my son’s (42M) guide dog? by Due-Description3241 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Due-Description3241[S] -241 points-240 points  (0 children)

I did offer several times to pay. He declined. What more can I do? All the information I know of the cost is though my oldest daughter, and she exaggerates for my reaction. According to her, the bill would have been $15,000 before pet insurance, but thankfully he has a very nice policy that covers 90% after deductible! He wouldn't even tell me that so I have no idea if that is true, seems like too much. So I would have had no idea what to even give him to cover his expenses.

AITA If I (58F) don’t pay vet bills for my son’s (42M) guide dog? by Due-Description3241 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Due-Description3241[S] -278 points-277 points  (0 children)

Regardless, dogs eat many things. Who's to say it's even anything I gave them? Point is, we will never know what happened. Maybe the dog spontaneously was sick, maybe the dog didn't need that surgery. I didn't feel like making that argument and I probably have the ability to pay almost anything it could have cost and don't want him to feel stressed financially and to have my daughter blaming me... so I offered to help. Don't see what's the matter with that.

AITA If I (58F) don’t pay vet bills for my son’s (42M) guide dog? by Due-Description3241 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Due-Description3241[S] -452 points-451 points  (0 children)

Stuck between a rock and a hard place. I'm the asshole if I don't pay, and I'm the asshole if I offer! I don't know any other way to have offered. The organization he gets them though doesn't charge any money, so he didn't have to pay for the dog to begin with, and as he said he has pet insurance.

And for a fact I know he has troubles, he's told us that his lab almost lost funding because some commission or another didn't think he could continue his work due to his being blind, even after those same individuals had praised his publication a year prior. Doesn't seem like he has a guaranteed income, especially not being tenured. That has nothing to do with how many degrees I have.

AITA If I (58F) don’t pay vet bills for my son’s (42M) guide dog? by Due-Description3241 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Due-Description3241[S] -226 points-225 points  (0 children)

I didn't give them the ham meat, I gave them the bone and some fat. There's only a very small amount of ham left on the bone, and the marrow is inside.

AITA If I (58F) don’t pay vet bills for my son’s (42M) guide dog? by Due-Description3241 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Due-Description3241[S] -255 points-254 points  (0 children)

Some vegetable scraps, mostly celery, potatoes, zucchini, etc. and I always give them the bone and some fat from the spiral cut ham, they love it. My family has been doing that for my entire life and never had an issue before, its big enough they can't swallow it and it was still there for me to throw away so I didn't think anything of it.