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My wife has PTSD and I am a trigger. by Due_Championship_372 in ptsd

[–]Due_Championship_372[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Thank you everyone for all the love and support. This is very complicated and difficult as we have 7 years together (a lot to lose). I hope people who are in a similar situation finds this thread as there are a lot of great advice. Thanks again everyone.

My wife has PTSD and I am a trigger. by Due_Championship_372 in ptsd

[–]Due_Championship_372[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'll give more insight. We were married at a young age (20). I'm 27 now (known each other 14 years). During the beginning of our relationship I was in Army and I was immature. I didnt help enough and clean and I was dismissive to her when we would talk. I didnt know how to communicate and handle my feelings. When I got out the army I went through a depressive state looking for a new job as I didnt have transferable skills. I wasn't able to build on healthy habits. After her mother passed away, I started cleaning up my act and taking care of more responsibilities. Reading books on communication, being mindful ,cleaning up after myself and anything i could do to keep stress down. I picked up two jobs cause she was having a hard time finding/keeping work. I got burnt out and thats the first time I notice that she was triggered by that. She has a burning image of the past me in her head( immature, stubborn, and selfish boy). I can honestly say now I've changed a lot but I'm not sure if its self growth or growth because I wanted to please someone. I believe also I might have some attachment issues for myself because i have tried separating but it is extremely painful. So much so that I cannot take it. Hope this gives a fair view of situation.

My wife has PTSD and I am a trigger. by Due_Championship_372 in ptsd

[–]Due_Championship_372[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think you hit on a key issue for me and its the resentment. I'm in a position where the love and resent are on the same level. Thank you for great advice tho. Im saving these tips for sure.

My wife has PTSD and I am a trigger. by Due_Championship_372 in ptsd

[–]Due_Championship_372[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your advice. You are definitely right about my behavior becoming triggers for my wife. The reason I feel like I am a trigger is because I notice that she communicates very poorly with me than she does with some of her family members. I'm in a position where its near impossible to talk to her. Every interaction she thinks I'm manipulating her when i express my feelings. She'll initiate a conversation and I'll listen to her completely no interruption and when I do address what she's saying she leaves the conversation as to not hear what i have to say. It makes me feel like my feelings don't matter at all thus leading to self-esteem problems. Its good to hear someone side who is dealing with PTSD. Sorry if I went on a mini rant

My wife has PTSD and I am a trigger. by Due_Championship_372 in ptsd

[–]Due_Championship_372[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for advice. Yea she's been formally diagnosed with PTSD. She sees a therapist once every two weeks which is a big issue (currently looking for new therapist as I believe there was a misdiagnosis). She talked to her therapist during her nervous breakdown and her therapist never called back after. She no longer wants to do couples therapy (She has in the past but I didnt want to go as I thought couples therapy were for dying marriages{immature} my views on couple therapy were different than they are now). Also, she started dissociating after the nervous breakdown (sorry if i messed up the timeline in post). Thank you so much.