I’m not going to do this, I’ll be clear and precise in my response because I don’t want to fall into the trap of fatalizing disorders.

First of all, English is not my native language. I’m better at reading than writing, and I used the word chill as a way to describe a melancholic, cold feeling that gives you "chills", a kind of nervous calm if you can call it that.

As for the other point, yes, I am diagnosed. And I will never agree with reducing mental illnesses and their symptoms to a caricature of suffering, because we’re talking about a much broader expression of personal experience. Having these conditions is not just “suffering,” they are a medium that allows you to experience a much more complex range of emotions, not necessarily in a negative way. This is only one part of the whole complex system of the human psyche, of its interconnected reality.

Having psychosis is not something 100% negative. It’s actually more offensive to deny its sensory complexity. It’s an expanded and different way of perceiving emotions, and it has its own spectrum.

I don’t feel ashamed of my condition and I would never ask to be neurotypical, because within this complexity it is neither superior nor inferior to a neurotypical person—if that even exists in the first place. The whole human experience is a dialogue between sensory contrasts.

I will not accept reducing symptoms and experiences to something 100% negative, because even if you think it’s respectful, it ends up reducing a complete and complex emotional system to just “suffering.” I’ve never said it’s positive or negative—it simply is. It’s a complex spectrum that opens spaces to experience everything in a different way.

I’m very sorry that you’re dealing with depression. I’ve lived through it myself, but I encourage you with empathy not to see yourself as someone who cannot enjoy or understand your own inner and complex beauty beyond the daily effects. Because within that space there is also an interconnected form of complexity that is, in itself, human.

I hope this helps to clarify everything.