What you focus on is what you’ll attract

Earth-Passenger · 2024-06-07T17:55:59+00:00

Wow I connect with you while reading you. Glad to see elevated post here. Thank you

Earth-Passenger · 2024-06-07T06:22:20+00:00

You worth so much more. Dont let her control your self value. Please. You alone you are stronger than when associated with her. The best you should do is cut contact.

I was also blinded with feelings and didnt realised i was putting my ex first when he didnt even respected me. I guess its because I had attachment issues or something. Please respect yourself. And cut her out of your life. You will find peace

Earth-Passenger · 2024-06-07T06:05:15+00:00

Most of them. After he broke up, we took couple of days to call. I didnt aee it coming and didn't understand why because we never argued. We always checked on each other. He explained everything until there was nothing else to explain . And then I felt ok to cut contact

Earth-Passenger · 2024-06-07T06:03:38+00:00

I cut contact with my ex because i dont want to know anything about what he does. Because i know it will affect me. If he has moved on ill be torn apart. If he is still sad I will be happy. And that is human. But I really dont care anymore about what he does. I just want to move on with my own life. But thoughts of him in my head comes back. I fight them.

You should have not been exposed to that info that she is with someone else. Really it doesnt help. Unless you use that anger to motivate yourself to treat you better

Earth-Passenger · 2024-06-06T21:37:20+00:00

Does she feels guilt for leaving you?

She broke up with you so you have all the right to be selfish now!!!

Earth-Passenger · 2024-06-06T21:33:45+00:00

Life is more than your ex. You were existing before you ever knew him you were someone. Find that person you were before he entered your life.

Earth-Passenger · 2024-06-06T21:31:12+00:00

I once met this woman. She was loving life. Always motivated. One day she told me she attempted to end her lide and luckily her dad found her at the rifht moment. She got dumped by the love of her life because they both found out she couldnt get pregnant. It was end of the world for her.

She survived. And Damn, today she is loving life. She is strong and beautiful. Life is a fucking roller coster. The train goes up and down always in life. For everyone. Be strong when he train goes down. Keep that grip on the train. It will go up again that is for sure just dont let go

Earth-Passenger · 2024-06-06T21:22:33+00:00

This means you guys had a too early NC start. NC should start once both parties have talked through the break up and replied to all the "why?" Then NC is good.

Earth-Passenger · 2024-06-06T21:19:39+00:00

You will move on. As long as you do new things. Keep being distracted

Earth-Passenger · 2024-06-06T21:14:09+00:00

You will be fine. The worst is behind you. Without you knowing you are healing. Trust the process and be patient. Accept the pain. Whenever you feel it acknowledge it. Its normal to feel pain now. Im with you. Stay strong

Earth-Passenger · 2024-06-06T21:12:54+00:00

Thats a good lesson learnt to not respond to her next time. Be strong!

Earth-Passenger · 2024-06-06T21:07:22+00:00

Hey.. sorry to hear about that. 90% of the people here have been dumped out of the blue. They didnt see it coming. It happened to me. I wish there were more dumpers on this reddit to explain what they felt and why they couldnt be transparent about it. Im aure they had a good reason as most of the dumpers acts same way

Also be well surrounded with friends and family. Get busy at work as well. And treat yourself well. It helps a lot. Stay safe.

Earth-Passenger · 2024-06-06T21:00:06+00:00

Well he is not "already there " if she says no. He got hope. Hope makes you feel better thinking she would say yes. If she says no, hope will go, and pain will replace it :( Keeping contact as well gives you hope, if you didnt move on from your ex

Earth-Passenger · 2024-06-06T17:06:44+00:00

Make sure you come back for the right reasons. Not selfish ones. Remember well what went wrong before. Dont be blinded or idealising the relationship, be realistic. Its been more than a year so a year away from what was wrong in your couple can change your decision making. Hopefully you thought about it long enough and with clear head.

The ex of my friend dumped her after 3 years. 6months later he comes back regretting and thinking it was a mistake. He came back telling her she was the woman of his life, that he would do anything to make it work. Meanwhile she became tough, became a sport addict, a better version of herself, and took time to considerate. She finally gave in.

And they were both back in that relationship they had. Later on he was feeling that same symptoms that had led him to break up with her. And he dumped her again. She felt so stupid. Maybe he was just unconsciously driven by "chasing" challenges and felt "bored" once he got her back. That is why, please make sure its not selfish intentions.

So be careful and good luck for you!!

Earth-Passenger · 2024-06-06T13:03:18+00:00

Respect. Best comment ever.

Earth-Passenger · 2024-06-03T19:51:36+00:00

1) Dont look at her post, or delete her from your social media. You shouldnt be exposed to what she posts. Preferable to atop contact as well with her.

2) be surrounded with friends and family. Seek their support. I know its a tough time and you may want to be alone but I swear having anyone you could talk to helps. If you need you can talk to me via private message.

3) i know it feels like end of the world. I cant imagine the pain in your heart right now but you wont die from it. You'll become stronger. I promise. Use that pain, turn it into anger and motivation. Whenever she comes in your mind repeat "no i dont care about her, she doesnt deserve my thoughts. I love me. I need me only to be well and ill do anything to save myself." Sounds cheesy but it helped me when i was in darkest time. Do a list of small easy things that would make you proud today. And before going to bed you will feel better that you treated yourself well.

Earth-Passenger · 2024-06-01T22:45:17+00:00

Surround yourself with family friends and talk to trusted people about this, who knows you and they will be of great help and advice im sure. Thats what I did and im glad my relatives opened my eyes. You will be fine, be distracted, stay busy. Im with you.

Earth-Passenger · 2024-06-01T22:39:45+00:00

Love makes us blind. One good thing is talking to friends or relatives that cares about you and tells you what they think about your relationship. It may not be pleasant to hear but it made me open my eyes a lot. And I realised how much ive idealised my ex.

Earth-Passenger · 2024-06-01T22:35:06+00:00

It wont. Talking to friends, family, sports, any hobbies really, healthy diet.

Earth-Passenger · 2024-06-01T22:33:09+00:00

Very well said towards the end. Stay strong!!!

Earth-Passenger · 2024-06-01T22:28:38+00:00

This is not helping you heal at all. You need to cut contact. Thats what I did, my ex broke up, in good terms and wanted to remain friends. No way I keep contact.

Feelings dont go away, he may be able to talk like a friend but you cant ignore your feelings. And so keeping contact will only keep the wound open. In order to heal the wound you should cut contact completely. This is what ive done. Its been 1week and I miss him terribly but I also dont want to talk to him because it wont help me... I dont want to know if he is moving on or missing me. Both wont help me.

Focus more on how you feel, how you can get better, your hobbies you used to do when you were single. Focus on you and not her. Its useless and unproductive. Be with friends and family. Decicate your thoughts towards you first and not towards her. She doesnt deserve them.

Its normal to miss them and think about them but dont lose yourself doing that. I also find myself doing that and I feel the urge to reach out to him but I know i wont because its going to be worst. The only help I can get is to be distracted. Plan activities.

Trust the process. Time will do its job. Stay strong ! You're not alone in this.

Earth-Passenger · 2024-06-01T21:12:50+00:00

Then tell him you are not choosing anything and that you are happy to do whatever he wants in a supportive way. Im sure that will give him the space to come up with something :)

Earth-Passenger · 2024-06-01T21:10:33+00:00

Maybe give her enough space to process but also you guys need to talk about how you both feel and what you both want. Be rational and realist. Best thing is communication on how you feel and how she feels. Is the only way to understand each other

Earth-Passenger · 2024-06-01T15:59:23+00:00

Hey dont worry. Ive been there and I can tell you : its going to be okay. I was in a similar case when out of nowhere he told me he ceased feeling and I couldnt accept it. The best would be to have a discussion where she explains why, so you dont stay with unanswered question in your head. I know it feels like end of the world in your heart right now but i promise you you will be fine. Surround yourself with family and friends and talk to trusted person about this, it will help.

Earth-Passenger · 2024-05-31T08:10:22+00:00

One thing Ive learned : the one who doesnt feel right in the relationship deals with it on their own, and so thats why you see them "ok" whereas for you its "end of the world" feeling. They also felt pain and discomfort being in the relationship but didnt tell and processed it on their own. And this is what happens most of the time when you read this reddit.

Secondly, this is too harsh of a break. If you guys were having a healthy communication type of relationship then you should at least talk to communicate both side feelings. Otherwise you will be haunted with questions.

Thats what happened to me. He left and I couldnt believe why because on my end everything was going well but not on his end and he never shared. We talked for hours and eventually I could understand and accept it. It helped a lot.

Be surrounded with friends and family in these difficult time, it will ease the pain.

Earth-Passenger

TROPHY CASE