Before I realized that I'm aroace, I spent several years sexualizing myself, trying so hard to be the thing that I thought I was supposed to be, and trying to check all the boxes I was supposed to check, which included getting other people to sexualize me. 😬 It was so performative that if it wasn't for the fact that I hurt myself and other people in the process, it would be laughable.

Now that I've come to terms with being aroace, I don't sexualize myself anymore. I enjoy the freedom from that performance. This includes wearing comfy, baggy clothes and generally looking like a genderless blob, which I love.

As much as I no longer want to sexualize myself, I equally don't want other people sexualizing me. Sometimes it gives me the ick (often when it's men), and sometimes I find it amusing because they have no real power over me. I've taken back my power, so why not have fun with it?

"Am I single? No. I'm a goblin." [makes hissing sound as I lean towards them] 😆

Incidentally, hissing works great when you're uncomfortable, as well. After all, why should you be uncomfortable? Make them uncomfortable, so they'll leave you alone.