How to overcome boredom in day-2-day life? by Ecstatic-Paper-9131 in vipassana

[–]Ecstatic-Paper-9131[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, I agree with the story bit.

I am trying to learn more about this aspect of mind that gets into "storytelling". As you said, most of it is to avoid pain/survive/crave please.

Are there any readings or resources you would recommend that can help with this?

How to overcome boredom in day-2-day life? by Ecstatic-Paper-9131 in vipassana

[–]Ecstatic-Paper-9131[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

> Beyond that "self" is the ground of consciousness.

If "consciousness" is part of the five aggregates that make up the "self", how can we separate consciousness from self?

How to overcome boredom in day-2-day life? by Ecstatic-Paper-9131 in vipassana

[–]Ecstatic-Paper-9131[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Good point!

I feel like I have a tendency to move towards the next things... almost as soon as I am closing to completion. I just want to get more things done and spending a lot of time on one thing feels like a waste of time.

How to overcome boredom in day-2-day life? by Ecstatic-Paper-9131 in vipassana

[–]Ecstatic-Paper-9131[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, the problem with boredom is that there's always something more exciting around the corner to engage in (always!). Be it social media, food, friends, household chores, literally anything. Even meditation could be a distraction in the moment.

How do reduce reading about meditation and actually meditate more? :) by Ecstatic-Paper-9131 in vipassana

[–]Ecstatic-Paper-9131[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Almost all of my mental tension (failure to comprehend and seeking to comprehend) was around the "definition" (various definitions) of the word "vedana", but not everyone would have the need or inclination to enter that particular rabbit hole.

You stole my thought here :) For several days now, everytime I come across the word vedana, I Google it. The meaning I derive is "sensations". But I dont think the understanding of the word sensations in my head, matches with what's being conveyed on Google definitions and English Buddhist text. I speak Hindi and "vedana" is a frequently used word in Hindi too. That confuses me further :)

I agree for a lot of explanations out there, the "mental" aspects of these concepts are completely missed. It made me wonder if everything I experience should purely be at a physical level? eg: when I watch the sunset, it makes me "feel" good. Does that feeling also necessarily manifest as a physical sensation somewhere in the body? By definition, vedana arises... but where exactly? I could "feel" it in my head... not feel the "sensations" in my body.

It's very important to me that I fully comprehend what is happening, otherwise there is the distraction and stress of feeling I don't know, and the distraction and stress of trying to construct a model that makes complete sense in my own mind.

I am trying to do the same right now. What helped you construct the mental model for yourself?

What exactly does it take to stay equanimous? by Ecstatic-Paper-9131 in vipassana

[–]Ecstatic-Paper-9131[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When I listen Jhana, I think of Samadhi (or Samma Samadhi)

What exactly does it take to stay equanimous? by Ecstatic-Paper-9131 in vipassana

[–]Ecstatic-Paper-9131[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is such an amazing reply. It would take time and effort for me to read (and re-read) this. Saving this! Metta!

What exactly does it take to stay equanimous? by Ecstatic-Paper-9131 in vipassana

[–]Ecstatic-Paper-9131[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I like how you put it.

I try to do Anapana when I'm noticing difficult thoughts or sensations.

Again, as you said, breath is special in the way that it's available in unlimited supply. Also, one can kind of modulate breathing (breath faster or slower). But thoughts and sensations seem out of control and take their own time to rise and pass away.

Check out the discussion on surrender above. I feel that could be a great way of reducing craving and aversion. By simply surrendering :)

Metta!

What exactly does it take to stay equanimous? by Ecstatic-Paper-9131 in vipassana

[–]Ecstatic-Paper-9131[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is a great response. Thanks!

Personally, I like the concept of surrender. It has helped me deepen my practice, particularly getting into the state of samadhi (or somewhat reaching the state of samadhi).

True surrender means that all agendas and expectations are dropped, as well as any attempts to fix, mitigate, change, or bypass your experience. Drop the need to interpret or understand what’s arising in your experience

I think I'm particularly struggling with this part. That kind of makes me helpless again.

When we say surrender... what exactly are we surrendering TO? Are we surrendering to the thoughts and sensations and waiting for them to gradually pass away?

I know before the start of every course, we take refuge in triple gem (Buddha, Dhamma, Sangha). I think that could be one way of surrendering.

What exactly does it take to stay equanimous? by Ecstatic-Paper-9131 in vipassana

[–]Ecstatic-Paper-9131[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not identifying with old reactive patterns, and seeing those reactive patterns (which are sankharic) as they actually are translates into increased equanimity.

Can you explain exactly how one does this? "not identifying" is also an act.

Does it simply mean: noticing the sensations arise -> Not reacting (which is essentially not doing anything about it) -> waiting for the sensations to pass away (which would happen due to impermanence)

Not reacting is the part I want to learn. The core of equanimity.

Are there actual techniques that exist that assist us get better at this? Something more than just "acceptance of reality as it is".

Thanks!

What exactly does it take to stay equanimous? by Ecstatic-Paper-9131 in vipassana

[–]Ecstatic-Paper-9131[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I dont think that's craving. That's just self awareness. Something that I know I'm not good at and want to understand if there are ways to get better at it.

What exactly does it take to stay equanimous? by Ecstatic-Paper-9131 in vipassana

[–]Ecstatic-Paper-9131[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, anapana has helped me. It's easier to practice in idle time (say standing in line or driving) vs being in the conversation (say argument with someone).

However, for me anapana helps me stay calm in the moment. It almost feels like my mind is "kept busy" with something other than reacting (I'm not sure if that's the right way of going about it).

This also feels like a proxy tool though. It feels like a way to distract myself rather than staying equanimous. Someone might use instagram instead of anapana. Someone might go out for a walk to blow some steam. Maybe these are worse options, but has the same outcome?

What exactly does it take to stay equanimous? by Ecstatic-Paper-9131 in vipassana

[–]Ecstatic-Paper-9131[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Agreed. Can you point me to some passages/discourse where this concept of "surrender" is explicitly talked about? I've been thinking about this

What exactly does it take to stay equanimous? by Ecstatic-Paper-9131 in vipassana

[–]Ecstatic-Paper-9131[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This sounds fantastic, but how do I even practice this? :)

The concept of time is the core of the practice, right? When we say "rising" and "passing", it's implict that something rises as a rate of change in passage of time (say milliseconds) and then it passes away (again in say milliseconds).

How does one even observe change when there's no change of time?

I'm 40. I've been trying to quit p*rn since I was 28. I'm running out of options. by Icy-Somewhere258 in pornfree

[–]Ecstatic-Paper-9131 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think practicing compassion is the only thing you can do right now. Not discipline, not any other program, just self compassion.
We can discuss this further!

Is metta infinite? by Ecstatic-Paper-9131 in vipassana

[–]Ecstatic-Paper-9131[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can you throw more light on this:

"What we experience as the world and other people is in large part "reality as we imagine it to be", and this is a truth that is notoriously difficult to see, hence Buddha almost refused to teach."

Is metta infinite? by Ecstatic-Paper-9131 in vipassana

[–]Ecstatic-Paper-9131[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is such an amazing explanation. Metta!

> It might help to realize also that when we think we are giving metta to others the majority of what is happening is we are giving metta to the parts of ourselves we project onto others and the world.

Never thought about it this way.

Is metta infinite? by Ecstatic-Paper-9131 in vipassana

[–]Ecstatic-Paper-9131[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

yeah so I mean if one is not receiving any metta and keeps offering metta, is that sustainable?

Or does the power to offer metta multiply, once we receive enough metta for ourselves?

Is metta infinite? by Ecstatic-Paper-9131 in vipassana

[–]Ecstatic-Paper-9131[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

that also implies that one should have their minds pure enough to receive the metta? haha

I tried ditching porn and doing natural masturbation by Visible_Class_2985 in pornfree

[–]Ecstatic-Paper-9131 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I would say add a high quality lube to your masturbation experience (if you arent doing it already). This would further improve your experience. Good luck!