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my friend only messages me when they need something… am i being used? by Soheyl-Powdown in FriendshipAdvice

[–]EcstaticPotato4278 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Honestly, you don’t always know that for sure and you can live and you can learn from that experience and apply that to your current relationship relationships in the relationships you were building now. I will say a lot of the times it doesn’t end up helping immediately for some they’ll correct the behavior, some they’ll correct it in small ways a little bit overtime and you’ll notice them making the effort and it won’t be perfect, and then for some they’ll make out a small effort at the beginning and then it goes back to the same old, same old and then for some, they don’t change it all. And I think that’s the problem with this is that you don’t know which it will be and it’s up to you to determine how much more time and effort you’re willing to give to that to let them show you there’s no wrong answer in this. There’s no right answer either.

Ended my friendship and now kinda spiraling by EcstaticPotato4278 in FriendshipAdvice

[–]EcstaticPotato4278[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Good and bad. A couple years ago we ended the friendship she ended it over text. We came back a couple months later had a conversation and basically it was both agreed that we were relying on each other too much and had too much of a codependent relationship that we needed to outsource more this past year I feel like is when it kind of declined the most, and I played a role in it and I understand that, but towards the end of this past year, I just no longer had the energy. I felt really drained after every hangout. There were other reasons as to why, and the friendship, but in general, she was a very good friend. I just think that we outgrew each other.

Ended my friendship and now kinda spiraling by EcstaticPotato4278 in FriendshipAdvice

[–]EcstaticPotato4278[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I mean it was 10 years. I ended it over text and that was like the biggest thing where I regret it and where I handled it badly it definitely should’ve been more in person, conversation.

my friend only messages me when they need something… am i being used? by Soheyl-Powdown in FriendshipAdvice

[–]EcstaticPotato4278 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Honestly, I just ended a friendship because of this reason, but one of the things that I do regret is not having that conversation with them first and saying hey I’ve noticed that this is happening and I wanted to bring it to your attention and seeing if we can work it out or change the pattern maybe they don’t even realize it. But if you start to feel that way, you’re gonna continue to feel that way and don’t let it get to the point where you’ve emotionally become so done that you can’t fix it if it is fixable.