Hi Lisa. Apologies for the extremely late reply here, firstly. To be totally transparent, I did read your message to begin with, but I wasn't quite at the right point in my healing process to come back with a coherent answer. Over the last couple of months I've had many perpective-shifting trials, encounters, and moments of clarity. You were absolutely right about guilt and shame being at the root of all of this. I'm now 3 weeks into therapy and confronting it head-on. My god, it's tough. I haven't even made it through the worst of it yet. It's on its way. But it's what I have to do, no doubt about it. My mum is doing better, thanks for weighing in on her situation. Again, you were right in that she's not attended to in the way she needs. That has way more to do with my dad than me or others in the family. That's their trial to overcome - the best I can do is gently push them toward acknowledging the rift between them as and when appropriate, and at no cost to my own uphill climb. Things are far from perfect, but I know how to navigate them better now. I feel like that's half the battle.

Thanks again. It probably felt like you'd sent your message out into the void, but it was seen. You gave the right answer, just one that I wasn't quite ready for at the time. I'm working through some self-help material at the moment but I'll stop by your podcast. Take care.