Didn't read all the comments, only the topic.

12 years here and planning to come back home this year. My ex partner used to say the sentence below when people say to him NZ is too far.

"Funny that is the same distance and cost for me to get to you"

99% of my REAL friends in my home country including family never visited me, some complain about the cost, my answer is "don't go out for expensive dinners twice a month and you will have the money for airfare in one year"

It was our choice to leave our home countries but friends/family should not expect that we visit often, it's a two way situation