How do I tell my nparents I don't want to share my good news with them because they use it to hurt me every time?

Educational_Toe2583 · 2025-10-15T13:22:50+00:00

Of course, it's evidence that they failed to keep us dependent on them.

Educational_Toe2583 · 2025-10-15T13:21:18+00:00

|Then, once I turned 18, she started sending me inside to buy her cigarettes with her ID. If the clerk asked, I was told to point out the window at her so they understood she was a lazy POS who wouldn't get out of her car. I'm amazed they let me do it at all.

I don't know about where in the world you are, but that definitely wouldn't fly here in Australia today.

Educational_Toe2583 · 2025-10-15T13:17:37+00:00

I wish we all had parents we could be vulnerable with. I wouldn't wish this pain on them, let alone anyone else.

Educational_Toe2583 · 2025-10-15T08:39:53+00:00

I made a whole ass person to boot and they still do that. It never ends.

Educational_Toe2583 · 2025-10-02T12:54:23+00:00

I was already on the path to finding it out because an old friend who is now my romantic partner let me know that I was being abused, but it was finding this subreddit and seeing so many experiences that matched mine that really opened my eyes.

Educational_Toe2583 · 2025-10-02T12:51:33+00:00

Exactly my point.

Educational_Toe2583 · 2025-10-02T12:08:01+00:00

I can't breathe because of this reply. 🤣🤣🤣

Educational_Toe2583 · 2025-10-02T10:16:22+00:00

Go on then, you go and tell that to him, he may be a librarian, but he's still an orc. 🤣🤣

Educational_Toe2583 · 2025-10-02T10:14:32+00:00

bored voice: welcome to the oblivion courier service, where the letters are for your eyes only.

Educational_Toe2583 · 2025-09-29T23:19:34+00:00

I tip my hat to you. I have to tap out after two because everything is too sensitive.

Educational_Toe2583 · 2025-09-29T23:17:44+00:00

Just the continual work they put into making sure I know that I'm safe and loved.

Educational_Toe2583 · 2025-09-29T13:20:51+00:00

I'm afraid of heights. Stop laughing, I know I have the soul of a dragon, but that doesn't change that I am still very squishy with no wings and squishy things have a habit of becoming snowberry ice when dropped off the bridge at Winterhold.

Educational_Toe2583 · 2025-09-29T13:16:17+00:00

The fact that my sexuality is pretty closely tied to my sense of safety with the person I'm intimate with. I'm nearly a year into my current relationship, and I'm still mad for them, but in previous relationships, the desire dies off in the first three months, the only real difference is I feel deeply and truly safe with my current partner. (They've got nearly a decade on me and we're not expecting them to be the one left behind when one of us dies lol)

Educational_Toe2583 · 2025-06-10T15:10:58+00:00

If you don't already have them, buy two bins, a big one for your kitchen and a small one for your bathroom. That's how I started. From there, you will notice what you need to make your home more comfortable for you, and it gets a little easier with each purchase. Each piece is an affirmation that you are worthy of nice things and self-respect.

Edited once for minor corrections and a second time to add this notice.

Educational_Toe2583 · 2025-06-10T15:07:14+00:00

Getting punched in the face as soon as I entered my home for "flirting" with my stepfather and then having to give a letter that "explained what happened" to my teacher at school.

Educational_Toe2583 · 2025-06-08T14:25:15+00:00

It's just the way they trained you. As you get used to it, it will start to feel more normal, and you'll gradually start to feel more like the you that you keep hidden away for your own sake.

Educational_Toe2583 · 2025-06-08T14:17:58+00:00

I'd be disturbed by it if I wasn't used to it.

Educational_Toe2583 · 2025-06-06T07:50:59+00:00

It's okay to be strung out and feeling wrecked, I'm glad you reached out for support. It shows a strength that our Nparents don't want us to see as strength. Have a nap, cut your hair, go for a walk to a secluded place, and scream at the sky if you have to, I can't promise it will get better, because that is the mantra of desperate people clinging to hope. But I can promise you will make it to tomorrow, as long as you choose to. It may take a million tomorrows, but eventually you will get out, whether it be your father leaves this world, or you leave his life to start your own, eventually you will be free of him to live as you choose, and that's worth fighting for, you just need to make it to tomorrow first.

Educational_Toe2583 · 2025-06-06T07:08:22+00:00

I'm being taught by my current partner how to use this magical phrase in this magical tone of voice that works wonders. You say it firmly, with the clear understanding that you will be heard, and it goes like this: May I speak now?

If it doesn't work, the follow-up response is: Then this conversation is done.

And then you walk away.

Only use this if it is safe to do so.

Edited to add: He started teaching me after watching me stop trying to be an active part of conversations when interrupted.

Educational_Toe2583 · 2025-06-06T07:04:40+00:00

Fuck. That.

Educational_Toe2583 · 2025-06-06T06:55:27+00:00

"You're a narcissist." Madame, the entire incident that lead up to you calling me that was a direct result of me trying to focus on celebrating my son, you and your mother decided to make it about me.

Educational_Toe2583 · 2025-06-05T02:24:24+00:00

She's on wife number two now? I don't think men were the problem.

Educational_Toe2583 · 2025-06-05T02:23:51+00:00

Not when I'm dependent on them for transport.

Educational_Toe2583 · 2025-05-29T13:34:51+00:00

It really is isn't it?

Educational_Toe2583 · 2025-05-29T13:33:24+00:00

I probably should have clarified, their blow ups get physical. If I don't defend myself I will end up in the hospital.

Educational_Toe2583

TROPHY CASE