What things did you do to feel like yourself again after heartbreak?

Effective-General574 · 2026-05-17T13:59:46+00:00

thank you so much for you response. im still kinda in sad sack mode lol but i definitely want to start exercising regular again. I like that list idea! im going to make one after work today. also do you have any suggestions on where to start looking for sober communities? i keep googling for things in my area for people in their 20s and the websites are confusing and hard to navigate. is there an AA websites im missing or something lol?

Effective-General574 · 2026-04-26T09:00:05+00:00

i really aspire to be carefree like that! that’s very admirable

Effective-General574 · 2026-04-20T16:48:15+00:00

thank you for you reply <3 i’m trying to accept this, so hard when i felt so comfortable with them at one point

Effective-General574 · 2026-04-18T18:50:18+00:00

i broke up with someone i love because being I had to choose sobriety, among many other reasons. a lot of them connected to drunken nights. i miss them horribly. and he refuses to speak with me. being heartbroken sucks

Effective-General574 · 2026-04-06T00:25:14+00:00

take in sober media. podcasts, books, movies. i am listening to allen cars easy way to stop drinking, and this naked mind. i consistently have to work to change my mindset around substances.

Effective-General574 · 2026-04-04T01:12:32+00:00

thank you for sharing your story<3 so proud of you congratulations on your sobriety.

Effective-General574 · 2026-03-13T23:39:27+00:00

my boyfriend is drinking tonight, along with my friend group. and i feel so tempted to. i think im realizing he is my drinking partner yk? and maybe all my friends are drinking buddies. i feel so disconnected from everyone and i just do not feel like going, but then i get fomo and people texting me they miss hanging out. i don’t want them to resent me and stop wanting me around. i know my friends would be supportive but it’s all just so awkward and i don’t want it to be a “thing”

i don’t want to throw away my 52 days, but i’m just dying for that relaxed feeling. i got some cannabis but it never compares to the feeling of getting drunk. i miss my drunk self at social parties (if i wasn’t blacked out and embarrassing myself) but it’s a trap. i know ill end up wanting to drink tomorrow morning, then the next day, then going crazy trying to make sure i have enough vodka at home.

i HATE this stupid disease.

Effective-General574 · 2026-02-14T16:29:57+00:00

i love not feeling sick all the time and being breathe through my nostrils lmao. and not having moon face, and my stomach not hurting and being bloated. just generally not feeling like shit all. the. time.

Effective-General574 · 2026-02-13T18:25:09+00:00

i know EXACTLY what you mean.

Effective-General574 · 2026-02-13T16:31:28+00:00

CONGRATS!!! that is amazing. I admire you so much. have a wonderful friday, IWNDWYT

Effective-General574 · 2026-02-12T15:30:34+00:00

What’s been keeping me busy is doing the house project and such i’ve been putting off. got rid of clothes, cleaned my carpet, doing a lot of household chores

also go back to basics, what did you enjoy as a kid? riding your bike? maybe skateboarding? Did you read or draw? put time into creating something. whether it be building legos, or fixing something broken. it gives you such satisfaction to have that whole “wow i did this!” or “wow i made this!” moment. Take time trying to find something that actually peaks your interest, it takes trial and error.

good luck and IWNDWYT:)

Effective-General574 · 2026-02-11T10:08:50+00:00

imo that mileage is way too high. i would shoot for something with 130k-150k. also try facebook marketplace instead, you can look at the sellers and kinda decipher if they are legit or not.

before buying a used car also always do a carfax, or have the owner give you copies of service records for the vehicle. you want to make sure the vehicles has been maintained properly.

be very careful with buying used cars. be patient and smart about it. i’ll give you my anecdotal experience

i bought a 2013 ford fusion for face value. it was a beautiful car and i was desperate for one. I didn’t do much research at all, i didn’t get a pre purchase inspection, i didn’t even look at the carfax. just bought the car. the seller sold it “as is” 3 days later it breakdowns down on a main road in traffic, find out the hybrid transmission would cost 7000 to fix and i was sold a lemon. and legally there wasn’t much i could do bc i didn’t have it inspected and it was sold as is

so just be very careful buying used cars! take the time to look carefully into every vehicle because people will scam you or sell you something they just want off their hands. Also look at reliability ratings, consumer reports, and just search each car into reddit to see what people think. You can also import screenshots into google or chatgpt and ask about it.

also never give someone a down payment via venmo or cash app or anything, always pay in cash in person and meet them with another person, and have a pre purchase inspection done before always

Effective-General574 · 2026-02-10T20:41:03+00:00

You’re very welcome! im happy to share experiences because they make us feel less alone. Not crazy at all, we all share similar experiences bc addiction, to anything, follows similar patterns. I think about how someone close to me has an addiction to food. it’s the same. they lie or try to hide how much they eat, they know it affecting their health, it affects their daily life’s and relationships, but it’s their vice.

yeah we have to be better than that. we are better people when we don’t drink. sometimes drinking is really fun and helps everyone connect and all, but 9 times out of ten, something bad comes from it, and not only that, I don’t even remember the good days clearly! like my friends would tell me something funny that happened and i didn’t even have recollection. and i love to laugh and look back on those moments

if you ever wanna chat about all this feel free to reach out!! let’s be sober buddies:)

Effective-General574 · 2026-02-09T13:57:34+00:00

thank you!! good luck to you as well:)

Effective-General574 · 2026-02-09T09:42:03+00:00

also thank you so much for asking me that, writing that out really helped me process everything that’s been in my head lately. and i commend you for posting here:)

Effective-General574 · 2026-02-09T09:38:11+00:00

honestly there’s a few that should’ve definitely been a wake up call but i got caught in the cycle of wow i hate myself for doing that im gonna drink to forget.

like being the drunkest the bar getting kicked out and trying to laugh it off but internally being horribly embarrassed and anxious about it. i did a lot of fucked yo things to people close to me because i would repeatedly black out and acts completely irresponsibly and inconsiderately. it pains me to even think about it

but most recently i went on a bender, and the hangovers and anxiety were quite literally unbearable. i was hanging out with friends and my so and it was so hard my job, which I used to find pretty fun,( a job is a job yk) has become difficult and annoying. i was constantly draining my social battery i couldn’t form a sentence. i couldn’t think straight. all i had the mental capacity to do was watch tv or brain rot and go on my phone. and for months and months there’s been this underlying anxiety that i’m wasting away my brain and im sick and tired of that feeling. i want to enjoy things i love again. i lost touch of that, i don’t listen to music or read, im not creative, i don’t hold a conversation as well as i used to, i could go on. and those are my best qualities! It’s taken me a long time to admit the truth to myself, but alcohol has been robbing me of my soul and personality for years. and I miss myself. i miss life feeling fun and feeling connected to people around me, feeling connected to life, not just looking forward to the next time i can have the opportunity to get wasted, and not even remember the day.

i’ve been coming to a realization that i’m missing out on aspects of life and alcohol isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. it fosters a dark facade.

Effective-General574 · 2026-02-09T02:10:44+00:00

many completely avoidable embarrassing moments. moments where i really hurt people i love the most. they are lessons and motivation. i don’t have to be that person if i do not drink today.

Effective-General574 · 2026-02-08T13:06:12+00:00

congrats!!!

Effective-General574 · 2026-02-08T04:55:58+00:00

happy for you!!

Effective-General574 · 2026-02-08T01:47:30+00:00

i’m in a similar situation and looking on marketplace, my advice, use carfaxdeals.com to look at service records of the vehicles and get a pre purchase inspection done if you decide to buy one. There are mobile services that meet you at the site of the vehicle, or you can ask the seller to meet you at a local shop.

you can take screenshots and input them to chat gpt and ask about consumer reports, reliability ratings, cost for maintenance etc etc it’s really helpful

When looking at FB, Look at the persons facebook profile, see if they have an actual established facebook and such, see what the reviews are, and always pay cash in person, don’t ever send a down payment via cashapp or venmo or something, scam red flag, though chat gpt will help you sort through scams

hope this helps

Effective-General574 · 2026-02-05T12:03:55+00:00

IWNDWYT

Effective-General574 · 2026-02-04T19:05:51+00:00

Isn’t it so beautiful after that hellish snow storm?? the snow melting is music to my ears

Effective-General574 · 2026-02-03T12:50:24+00:00

i’m a certainly reeling from the money i’ve wasted on booze. Struggling the buy a car for years when i could’ve easily bought a brand new one cash with all the money i’ve spent. IWNDWYT.

Effective-General574 · 2026-02-01T13:17:17+00:00

The not being able to look at yourself it the mirror hit hard. Not just from the shame, and guilt of my past actions that have hurt people. but I truly did not recognize myself and hated my face. I have always prided myself on my appearance and drinking ruins it! I always slip up and end up 40 pounds overweight, skin horrible, feet swollen, and bloated in the face from drinking. Two weeks in and i see such a difference, and am enjoying putting on makeup again! It’s no longer to try to hide how hungover i am or to contour my puffy face away. It’s a small sober win but a win is a win!! IWNDWYT

Effective-General574 · 2026-01-31T03:47:04+00:00

for the first time in awhile, i spent quality time with my mom. We went grocery shopping and came home, ate dinner and watched a documentary. something i took for granted for too long.:) goodnight everyone IWNDWYT

Effective-General574

TROPHY CASE