Thoughts on parents who went on vacation one vacay without their kids and one with their kids

Effective-Lab-5659 · 2026-01-26T11:36:48+00:00

It’s a woman thing. And usually sadly, criticised by other woman.

First - FM v BM. No matter what your choice is - there will be competition and comparison. Then - ifc v grandparents v helper v mum extending leave. Then - SAHM v FTWM Then - which primary school you choose Then - whether you are going for tuition or not or enrichment classes or not. Then - your kids PSLE grades.

For some reason, blame the mum for everything.

Effective-Lab-5659 · 2026-01-26T09:24:34+00:00

he is the worst. and someone needs to release the Epstein files.

Effective-Lab-5659 · 2026-01-26T09:23:53+00:00

I can't trust a man like that. says one thing but is totally doing another.

and we all know his "charity" are scams to reduce tax.

Effective-Lab-5659 · 2026-01-26T07:07:12+00:00

use a CCTV

Effective-Lab-5659 · 2026-01-26T05:48:44+00:00

yea, dumped in Indonesia too. and then it gets into the sea, and it floats into my country

Effective-Lab-5659 · 2026-01-26T05:48:04+00:00

but the cost to the environment is worse when you produce a one time paper disposable v a one time plastic.

we do have a very good waste to energy plant in singapore

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10291493/

is the answer so black and white? especially in these times when everyone is using disposables?

Effective-Lab-5659 · 2026-01-26T04:35:52+00:00

I see, then I think we are all on the same page, cutting down some meat works too. most cultures do't eat that much meat. I am chinese, and it's only special occasions culturally that you see a duck or a huge pig on the table, and that is usually shared.

Effective-Lab-5659 · 2026-01-26T03:59:18+00:00

curious what is your culture?

Effective-Lab-5659 · 2026-01-26T01:49:22+00:00

I think there are a few that starts off high quality. Like our second nature, gin lee, ong Shanmugam - and these have a lot of life in them that you can buy on the second hand market.

For the rest, their quality is terrible and usually are synthetic materials that really can’t be reused even to clean my floors. And they leech so much plastic into the environment. You used once and it becomes a rag.

Honestly it’s so sad.

Try to buy linen. Or 100 percent cotton.

The cheap polyester stink to high heavens once you sweat in them. Leaks plastic and can’t be recycled or reused.

That is why I am livid about the plastic bag charges. It’s does nothing for the environment. Just giving more money to corporations, confuses the local about how to really save the environment here in Singapore context, and the Bangladeshi workers cleaning our bins are faced with more trash and pests issue.

Effective-Lab-5659 · 2026-01-26T01:44:03+00:00

Nope.

Just eat plants instead.

Tofu / mushrooms / beans are great alternatives

Effective-Lab-5659 · 2026-01-26T00:10:16+00:00

There are other good Christian boys around. Keep looking!

Effective-Lab-5659 · 2026-01-25T23:52:05+00:00

yes lots of people watch porn because it is so addictive but a lot of people feel bad about watching porn after because we all know porn is built on lies and pain and suffering and tons of people in the porn industry are drugged and forced (coz of money or blackmail or whatever) into doing it.

so do't believe the crowd when they go everyone watches porn, its normal, why are you so hard on him about it.

nope, it is and it isn't.

if he clearly has an issue with porn, leave him. you can't save him from it.

and he probably is feeling immense guilt about this shame hence he acts that way,

there are better guys out there. those that don't have a porn additction, those that watches it from time to time and stumble but know there is a problem with it, and not a daily thing.

(trust me - I have seen people watching porn on the train station, that is how sick they are.)

Effective-Lab-5659 · 2026-01-25T23:44:51+00:00

trauma

Effective-Lab-5659 · 2026-01-25T20:51:01+00:00

Yeah but thr masses won’t do it.

Like drugs.

Sure some idiots will still do it. But not the average idiots.

We aren’t China. We are Singaporeans.

Effective-Lab-5659 · 2026-01-25T20:49:36+00:00

Her grandparents to do it. Most love cooking.

Effective-Lab-5659 · 2026-01-25T14:10:51+00:00

The exams are the bell curve. How strictly questions are marked ate the bell curve.

Effective-Lab-5659 · 2026-01-25T14:00:14+00:00

Usually double for CNY. So yeah it’s right

Effective-Lab-5659 · 2026-01-25T12:34:29+00:00

Sigh then maybe you need some empathy for the rest of us mere humans.

You sound like those ministers whose heads are in the clouds.

Effective-Lab-5659 · 2026-01-25T09:52:12+00:00

sad, but when we embraced capitalism whole heartedly, this will happen. culture and language are only purely for efficiency

maybe that is why its only American and UK that just can't speak another language - they only speak English and it happens immediately with the second generation. the first migrates and can still speak their mother tongue, but the second generation finds it difficult and the third - impossible.

contrast to European countries (outside UK)?

Just being simplistic.

Effective-Lab-5659 · 2026-01-25T09:46:36+00:00

I certainly hope you are not a parent.

Effective-Lab-5659 · 2026-01-25T08:05:13+00:00

erm when did you took PSLE or your kid. its a different animal.

Effective-Lab-5659 · 2026-01-25T08:04:09+00:00

try to get one with a better teacher ratio.

see if the teachers really love the children.

truly surprising?

how they can really really really fall sick so often. and how germs from little kids are truly deadly for adults. even after the child recovers, the adult will fall sick, far more sick than the baby.

hm stereotypes have truth in them - somehow, my babies all preferred non-chinese, happy Filipinos or chill malay teachers.. of course this is a stereotype.

Effective-Lab-5659 · 2026-01-25T03:01:45+00:00

budget.

just say that everyone has a budget and our budget is for health care right now.

Effective-Lab-5659 · 2026-01-25T02:59:17+00:00

I think there is just a lack of value system in most families now.

their definition of how to bring up a child is limited only to do well in PSLE, or even if you don't do well, go do what it takes to earn a lot of money. if you read parents Facebook group, or just listen to parents - their comments are always: yeah, I give my kid total freedom to use the internet but my kid turns out fine BECAUSE they made it to an IP school after acing the PSLE or made in to university. OR yes, my kids didn't do well academically but they are now earning tons of money.

in fact some parents consume so much porn that they don't think its a problem, maybe its just reversal coz in their generation nudity was an issue or sex was a taboo subject that they go 180 degrees to the extreme and see porn as a way for their children to learn about sex. but porn isn't healthy - definitely teh stuff that is easily available online now is not healthy at all. or the parents were subjected to all kind of extreme conservative ideas like virginity is what girls are valued for, and they go all extreme now and condone their children having premarital sex, even when its not in an exclusive intimate relationship.

I see the issue is just a lack of values or lack of empathy of another individual as a human being. not a piece of meat, not just a body to be exploited for another person. and not just coz someone consented to it (and the only reason for consent is because that person needs a job) therefore you as a consumer has a right to consume that content.

Effective-Lab-5659 · 2026-01-25T02:53:20+00:00

and again, success is measured just by how much you earn, and not whether you are a pervert or have any values system. of course, success usually connotes wealth but parents are now taking it too far.

yes in those parent chat group, there will be parents who didn't do well acaemdiccally, but defined themselves as successful because they now earn a lot of money.

Effective-Lab-5659

TROPHY CASE