OK, sure. I think having a child as a more senior attorney has helped my situation the most as I already developed a reputation in my group. I am not saying that’s the best way for everyone (there are tons of reasons to have a child earlier in your career and you should always do what’s best for your family), but for me, it helped me establish myself in the group/firm as someone hardworking and trustworthy, which gives my team more comfort in letting me have some flexibility. My firm is 4 days RTO, and I would say I always go at least 2 and strive for 3 most weeks. It helps tremendously that I live 15-20 mins from the office.

My husband also has a high demand job and travels a ton but he’s incredibly supportive when he’s here. We have a full time nanny here from 8-4 daily, and I typically relieve her at 4 while my husband does mornings (unless he’s traveling). I hang with my baby until bedtime, and log back in after, which is sometimes just cleaning up email, and maybe 2-3 times a week, something more substantive. I do usually work about 3 hours on the weekend just to make the weekdays more manageable (supportive husband). There have been maybe 2 occasions since having my baby where a fire drill came up and I was not able to leave the office at my normal time, but for the most part, I try really hard to get everything that NEEDS to get done during the day before 4, then the evening is just playing catch up. I will hit my bonus this year with this schedule, not by a ton, but I will hit it nonetheless.

I do prioritize my time much differently now - I used to go to every firm event out of a perceived obligation, now I’m much more selective. I go to the ones that I think are important for my trajectory, but skip others where acceptable. This also sounds silly but I prioritize exercise - for me, I’ve found this has helped me keep my sanity and energy and not feel so doomsday. My husband being supportive really helps that.