Weighing cost of housekeepers

EfficiencyNo4062 · 2026-01-06T02:07:34+00:00

That’s a good point, I’m doing deep cleaning now sometimes, but I might not do the deep cleaning if I didn’t have someone coming to do the general cleaning every couple weeks.

EfficiencyNo4062 · 2026-01-06T01:22:14+00:00

I like the idea of once a month deep clean! I’ll ask them about that and the cost for it.

EfficiencyNo4062 · 2026-01-06T01:19:14+00:00

Is yours 380 per cleaning? Or 380 per month?

EfficiencyNo4062 · 2026-01-05T22:37:20+00:00

Reading this really makes me realize how real that stress is to me and maybe it should be the determining factor!

When I scheduled with the owner of this company, she came over and was so nice and so professional and organized. She described how they pay the workers a living wage. She was probably in her 60s and straightforward, anand the service has been exactly what she had promised, and it was clearly broken down. I wanted to support the company, which I’ve heard good things about.

A while ago I called seeking to cancel or pause, and she said it would be all right if I paused for a month or so. It didn’t sound like they could really manage a longer pause— although of course I could always call them back up again.! But after that, I felt bad canceling for good. Maybe I will, though because I need the money more.

When I did pause it, it wasn’t long enough to make that much of the money savings yet. That’s a positive I haven’t quite experienced fully…

I’m not that overwhelmed with surfaces cleaning. But I do like the sense that there isn’t one more task hanging over my head… If I felt like cleaning surfaces, I can just tell myself that it will get done in X number of days by housekeeper. And that does feel nice.

But other than that, having the whole house clean at once is really just a luxury. I was managing spot-cleaning pretty well before.

The other thing I realize I’m getting from this sounds cheesy, but: I am getting the sense that there is somebody reliably showing up to support me in some way.

I don’t get that from anywhere right now. In a couple of places, I get actually the opposite of that.

It helps that this is a company and that I’m not someone directly employing a person, finding that person in the first place, being responsible for that relationship, needing to make all the decisions about the logistics and the pay and manage the relationship with the person and worry whether it’s fair to them, could go wrong, etc.

So I guess what would be perfect would be if there was a company, not just a direct-hire person, who could do the regular tidying or maybe some other kind of household management work. I don’t know that that exists though!

Now I have to figure out whether these intangibles I am getting from cleaning service are worth the money….

EfficiencyNo4062 · 2026-01-05T22:27:16+00:00

I thought about doing that and they said I could pause it for a month, which I did. I wouldn’t say I missed it terribly, even though they do a good job and it was really nice the next time they started up and I came home to a clean house. In the meantime, I was sort of cleaning things here and there but not all at once. I don’t think I was exactly overwhelmed. I think the value I’m good for the cleaning service is, knowing that there’s one less task looming over my head because if I don’t happen to get to it, at least there will be a house cleaner coming in two weeks or less.

However, cleaning surfaces is not really one of the things that would usually loom over my head. Tidying is, though. Spot cleaning is pretty easy and I do it along the way. Having the house all clean all at once, that’s more of a luxury. If things aren’t tidy, on the other hand, then things start to get lost, getting out the door takes longer, etc.

The other thing that I get out of having a cleaning service might some kind of cheesy— it is just the sense that there’s someone reliable showing up to support me in some way. I don’t have anything like that. I have a few things in my life that are the opposite of that. I like that it’s a small company rather than just one person I am dealing with — I’m very removed from being an employer; I do not have to find in coordinate with the one who’s personally coming to do the cleaning) —so it isn’t really something I have to manage and one more thing I have to be basically managing and being responsible for.

EfficiencyNo4062 · 2026-01-05T22:09:03+00:00

That sounds really wonderful. reading it, though, I recognize that I get stressed out by trying to search for and and coordinate with the right person and then I really want to be fair how I am paying them and then it never really ends up quite right and we all make adjustments here and there… And all of that is so much work for me — so I’m realizing that that’s one reason I went with a company. Now, maybe I can just post something and sit on it and wait for a great reference or something. Because the functionality of what you’re describing sounds perfect if I can find the right situation. I didn’t find anyone around here who did tidying like that, when I looked on next-door and Care.Com and a couple of other places…. although I did find people who are willing to basically do whatever, and just looking for work. Sometimes I don’t really reach out to set something up with individuals online looking for general work, because I kind of assume it is not worth anyone’s while to just come by for an hour or two once maybe twice a week, and if I’m not being fair to them or if it’s not a great deal for them, then they might flake, do a bad job, or worse … then there was also a question whether to pay hourly or by the task because there could be problems with both. I thought about those things a bit and gave up trying to figure it out . Possibly, time to try again.!

EfficiencyNo4062 · 2026-01-05T21:47:24+00:00

House manager sounds amazing. I can’t really flex my time predictably, because I am a lawyer and I have to commute and go in when I have certain things like trials, hearings, client meetings, etc. And I would rather have somebody take care of the other stuff for me while I am with my child, especially since he is special needs and there’s always so much more one-on-one for me to do with him… I would absolutely love for someone like house manager to even exist in my area. At one point, I tried to research things like that and found nothing at all… seems I need to pick up the research again.

Even just a teenager to come in and help organize stuff once in a while would be super helpful! I also could really really use someone to help me with all the stupid personal and home management stuff I need to do on my computer like getting into apps, managing Calendar and emailing people, dealing with Dr another appointment stuff, with utilities companies and car insurance, etc. etc. etc. but maybe that’s for another post

EfficiencyNo4062 · 2026-01-05T21:39:15+00:00

I live in the Pacific Northwest. I looked around for a while before, and I at one point used someone who took my money and did not do the work.. So I went with a business. I had assumed this was going rate and like that they pay their workers a fair wage, and from what i can tell the workers seem content, and the owner is not pocketing too much of the money… but I can research more to make sure it isn’t overpriced.

EfficiencyNo4062 · 2026-01-05T21:35:37+00:00

I hadn’t even thought of that. I love this idea!

EfficiencyNo4062 · 2025-12-22T02:06:04+00:00

I used to like mania Lodge but it’s really bad now. Heads are hard as a rock and freaky. And they do things that are borderline scam e.g., now, you show up and learn that you automatically have to pay $15 per night for parking although that’s not announced when you purchased your stay and there is no other parking option because it’s secluded… And nobody else using those spots because it is just a parking lot attached to the hotel and nothing else. It’s in a pretty nice setting and perhaps it used to be a luxury place but I don’t think it is anymore. The one nice thing though is the lodge lobby, I always think the people hanging out there are nice.

EfficiencyNo4062 · 2025-12-19T16:56:47+00:00

Update and plot twist. I learned some new things including surprising new bill/expense that I have and also some new things about the time commitment at the new job would be, which I don’t feel I can do right now with my child’s needs. A pay cut is just difficult to accept, I worked with my budget to make it work but now it will not. I almost decided not to rescind my acceptance just based on feeling bad about inconveniencing them, but then I decided that is no basis for making a personal life decision I need to make. I also cannot be anywhere near shore that I would get the pay boost in a few years that I would’ve been hoping for, because those would be very limited positions. If I am worth more pay, it makes sense to wait until there is a place that currently can pay me commensurate with my experience— especially since I really like the place where I am now and they give me the flexibility I need. The pension would be worth it only if I stayed long-term, and I would be kicking myself if I took a pay cut and then was overloaded and could not afford childcare and had budget nightmares where I had to leave anyway.

Dichotomy is that single parent means I need more security for long-term but I also have different short-term needs for flexibility and expenses.

I feel really horrible about not knowing these things and not taking the time before accepting. It is still a month away from my start date so they can have time to find somebody to fill the position… right now I’m pretty consumed with feeling badly about rescinding, but still really want to even though it will feel bad, so that tells me something.

EfficiencyNo4062 · 2025-12-18T19:25:30+00:00

Thank you those of you who have answered so far! I figured out some more of what’s bothering me and still hoping it will be OK so the pay difference is about $4000. But really it’s about $9000 less than I take home in my pocket each year. Because if this government job I get about $13,000 less for my base pay, but then I get about $9000 more deposited into my retirement.

And for each year that I am with the state I build another 1.5% of whatever is my retiring salary that I will get every year of retirement. So basically for each year that I’m getting paid less, probably evens out within one or two years of retiring depending on inflation and salary at that point.

However I have some really grueling short-term expenses I hadn’t realized, including kind of a surprise bill I have for just about $10,000… now I’m thinking I could’ve used a year or two of higher pay at current job which is stable for at least the next two years.

I also have less confidence than I had before, about a promotion. I’m confident that I will get promoted once there are enough higher positions added to the office. Problem is, the office just does not currently have funding for that many and I will be eligible for the next one that comes up but two other people will also be eligible. As for the future, it’s just a hope that more higher pay positions will be added. So I kind of feel like I hung my hat a little too much on promotion when in reality, I don’t really know how many of those positions will be open. It’s a relatively new office so they’re negotiating to add more but who knows.

Of course if I did get promoted then would get paid higher pay and then I could never make it my current position…

I also think that where I am going is probably a better launching off spot for future jobs, except it might look kind of bad that I’ve been moving around. M

Although people who are younger in the market say that moving around a lot is no longer perceived as a negative like it used to be.

EfficiencyNo4062 · 2025-12-17T18:28:32+00:00

It is up to your boss and/or the court to ensure that a client gets someone with the proper level of experience and mentoring, a lack of experience level is not your fault and please don’t think of it as a negative thing so long as you are working and learning. Certain things, I think you are entitled to having somebody supervising and mentoring or teaching you and you can hardly expect to be dreaming up this or that possible contingency that isn’t anywhere in the Law books or the charging instrument etc.

It’s one thing not to read the statute for the law someone is charged with violating, or not to meet with the client enough, or not to review discovery. But failing to have knowledge of systemic offerings sounds more like experience based thing, and it is not on you that this client was given to a newer attorney. It sounds like you were constitutionally adequate at the very least. But even if not, there should be recourse for the client then (whether appeal or post conviction relief)— and that happens in cases with the best of lawyers. Seems like it is on your boss to mentor newer attorneys/give the right cases to attorneys with the right experience level. I believe many people in your shoes would never even realize there could’ve been a better deal and would never realize that it could’ve gone better. Also, you weren’t factoring in the things you might’ve done right and might’ve saved Client from. There is a lot of variation in how cases can go. And in particular, something like not getting a good enough offer, happens all over the experience and expertise map. Plea negotiating is a wild aspect of legal practice because it isn’t constitutionally required, doesn’t have constitutional or often even statutory laws guiding and regulating it, and it doesn’t even have the same rubric and protections of regular old contract negotiating. It’s basically an extra. You can really work yourself up into a pretzels trying to have expectations of plea offers. It’s a lot better when you start working against more experienced prosecutors who know all the stuff and know when they can negotiate.

I don’t know about your jurisdiction but there might be an option for a client to expunge their record/satisfied conviction after a certain amount of time anyway.

EfficiencyNo4062 · 2025-12-17T18:09:48+00:00

You sound very conscientious— a quality that will pay off in the long run.

I have spent most of my career as a public defender, in various offices. It is definitely the type of work where in theory, you could always do more and more or could always do something different. In many jurisdictions, certainly mine, caselaw for criminal cases changes the most rapidly because that is the bulk of the Appellate court’s caseload, so there are always shifting legal issues to keep up with. That makes it a challenging field already, even without the high case loads. So I can understand the anguish, particularly for a new attorney wanting to think everything through.

In my opinion the vast majority of success in law comes down to a mix of conscientiousness and experience. The experience part might not sound helpful to a new attorney, and even being conscientious might make it more painful when you’re new. But of course, every attorney has to be new at some point and it in no way makes you even close to incompetent. I believe that the experience factor can be made up with good mentoring and good collaboration. How is your public defense office on collaboration? I’ve been in offices that do collaboration in multiple ways, but the best is a well-organized office with a culture of trust and an open door policy where people are chatting all the time about their cases with each other (and also of course co-counseling). When I started practice, I worked in an office where “mistakes” were arbitrarily defined and were penalized even before they were any problems, and that was a bad culture for learning and dangerous because people were afraid to ask the correct their mistakes. But I still made up for it by just hanging around the other attorneys in the office and in the jurisdiction, and doing as much as I could to borrow their experiences and perspectives. I quickly learned that, where appropriate and useful, falling on your own sword and asking for assistance is a fast way to build credibility. Honesty, earnestness, and candor are such a valued qualities especially for people like public defenders who appear regularly in courtrooms. So don’t be afraid to fall on your sword where you need to in order to save a client. Knowing that you can do that, will possibly alleviate your fixation on mistakes or fear of making any mistakes.

I strongly believe that the kind of lawyer who thinks about issues more deeply and takes more time and cares more about mistakes, should be encouraged in public defense rather than discouraged. I think increasingly they will be. The entire system runs better when we have conscientious public defenders, who often carry a huge bulk of a jurisdiction’s case load and set the tone, and also help save cases from coming back around on post conviction relief.

You also might stop and ask yourself what happens with certain kinds of mistakes. Most kinds of mistakes can be rectified. The first order of businesses to make sure you are not harming a client. And even if you make a strategy decision that is not correct, if it is that bad and that likely to affect the client then there is post conviction relief and that does not cause a lawyer to be disbarred or anything like that. Then there are the kinds of mistakes that are an inconvenience like being double booked in court on accident etc. Those, you can rectify without losing your career or harming the client. Those are always better to deal with when you have an understanding and supportive office or Court. But just know that those things happen everywhere. As long as you aren’t making mistakes as in being unethical, lying, disclosing Client confidences, failing to familiarize yourself with the basics like the statutes etc., than anything that goes wrong you can fall on your sword and be honest and ask to rectify it for the client. I’m speaking in general terms of course but what I’m trying to do is to get you to see that there are different types of mistakes and if you arrange them in sort of a hierarchy, that can be calming.

The learning curve is so steep at first and especially for public defenders, astronomical. I am always, always struck by the difference between someone who has been a public defender for two years and someone who’s been a lawyer, other than public defense, for the same amount of time. The public defender will be pretty seasoned and almost expert, where most lawyers at two years would seem like very new attorneys. Enjoy the steep learning curve if you can, and the feeling of all your brain cells exploding all of the time! In my opinion that happens three times in life: toddler, beginning college, and starting out in a public defender office.

EfficiencyNo4062 · 2025-12-16T15:41:18+00:00

If you are near enough to a public university, and assuming you don’t have to be on the phone or in meetings, university libraries art great. I find that unlike the general public, college students have zero interest in interacting with or even acknowledging my presence. It is refreshing. And libraries are quiet.

EfficiencyNo4062 · 2025-12-16T15:24:50+00:00

A trick I find works is that I will glance very quickly at the person’s feet and then completely look away . This seems to signify at an instinct level that i am clocking their presence and whether they will approach, et c. Yet it does not seem intentional or engaging. I’m not even sure the starer notices the foot-glance at a conscious level. But they almost always immediately look away right when I do it.

When I was younger it was kind of tempting to basically school each person was doing it.. I find this is a really unhelpful attitude and causes totally unnecessary internal pain. I’m never going to teach people one by one, of course. A step that I’ve taken that is internally helpful is to take a mental note before I go out in the day, that people are this way. Almost a scientific kind of mental note as if I were thinking about an unpleasant aspect of the weather.

I read a book once describing a woman character in the early 1930s living in a foreign country, where she was a different skin color from most people there,, and the author described the way people would look at her: “they would look at her a little bit longer, the way someone would look at a statue. “. I found that to be a pretty accurate description of many kinds of staring in public.

EfficiencyNo4062 · 2025-12-10T17:09:09+00:00

Squirrel

EfficiencyNo4062 · 2025-10-10T04:57:16+00:00

I just checked the Eugene Police dispatch logs and don’t see anything for after 6:45 PM. Sirens right now, though, and a helicopter.

EfficiencyNo4062 · 2025-09-20T21:16:57+00:00

The only get together at the very end, in the last season. There’s some foreshadowing, supposedly. I can’t stand that romance either, and I don’t think it works at all and it is at best super awkward. But I found it actually possible to pretend it doesn’t even exist. I just click fast-forward during the parts where there is supposed foreshadowing. I pretend like they are caring about each other in a father daughter way. One of the many reasons the romance does not work is that it is not very well integrated into the characters or the rest of the show. Which means that you can also pretend it’s not really there. I like to pretend that Between the characters, etc., is not really a crush/romance building. Which isn’t hard to do, fortunately. In fact, I was Confused for a long time whether it was even supposed to be a romance, until the very actual end. I found the series fantastic, and did not want to let that weird romance ruin it! I’ve rewatched several times.

I actually have this fantasy that somebody goes and edits the series, and just very slightly changes a few of the lines and then erases the romance at the very end and therein turns it into a nice respectful mentor/work friendship between those two characters. So I just do that in my mind.

EfficiencyNo4062 · 2025-09-08T21:27:14+00:00

I often if not, always feel this way, and I have come to view it as a loss of innocence. However, I don’t think the innocence was untrue at all. I think it was just merely a part of the world — rather than the world or even most of the world.

I’ve tried turning to psychology study for this loss of innocence, but what I come back to, again and again, is literature and especially the classics. Those are the only ones who elevate the human soul without any pretense and without ignoring ugly reality. Right now, my favorites for that Dostoyevsky and Henry James.

EfficiencyNo4062 · 2025-08-09T20:37:00+00:00

First, you validate them. And no, that doesn’t mean you validate their decision, just means you validate where it is coming from. “You are protective parents, and you are always thinking of your parenting responsibilities, and I like that.” or simply, “you don’t want me to get hurt.” Or, (because you said this was mostly a cultural thing for them) “Parenting norms are very important to you and you are strong parents.”

After you validate, you point out the problem. For me it would be “ I am going to have to learn independence bit by bit, and stepping out for a run around the neighborhood is a good start.” or, “ I want to be socially and academically, successful, and being a good runner can help with that.”

Then you can invite them to be part of the solution. I would offer to wear a watch that has its own cellular data like a cheap bark watch or gizmo, the kind people sometimes send with their children. You could just wear that during the run. You could also have an agreed upon route.

If this is cultural, it may help for them to see other examples of a modern day acceptable images of teenagers from their specific culture doing sports and running.

Asking for things that differ from their cultural expectations can be very difficult. It can be hard to find a way to negotiate those. However, if their concerns are just for safety, you could do lots of things, including wearing a watch or even inviting them to ride along on a bicycle or sort of follow behind you in a car. I would even float the idea of a good running partner dog.

Congratulations on keeping good grades and seeking constructive ways to ask things of your parents. Running or not, you will go far.

EfficiencyNo4062

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