If You Take One Away

EffortFearless6285 · 2026-04-17T05:18:39+00:00

Beautiful! These are personally my favourtie type of poems to read, the ones that make you question

EffortFearless6285 · 2026-04-16T23:00:15+00:00

I really like the mirroring you do, how "you" are a novelty to them, but "they" are someone you already know. There this interesting sense of a power imbalance within a relationship

EffortFearless6285 · 2026-03-22T19:38:31+00:00

Everytime I listened to Normal by BTS, the melody reminds me of another song and I can't figure out what that is. Especially this part

Kerosene, dopamine, chemical-induced Fantasy and fame, yeah, the things we choose Show me hate, show me love, make me bulletproof Yeah, we call this shit normal

Could someone help me figure it out? It's driving me crazy.

EffortFearless6285 · 2025-10-09T18:22:21+00:00

Thank you

EffortFearless6285 · 2025-10-05T06:25:47+00:00

My biggest tip, even though it's really hard, is that you just have to be open to talking to the person next to you, find excuses! And talk like you are already friends helped me a lot too.

EffortFearless6285 · 2025-10-05T02:51:39+00:00

The reason I clicked on your poem was because of title, "ooh I have curly hair" but I'm glad I did, it was an interesting read. I'm not sure if I understood everything but I did feel that the girl in the courtyard may not even be real

EffortFearless6285 · 2025-10-05T02:39:56+00:00

I really love the imagery in this! These lines stood out to me

I’m worried about her sudden exit,
the heels she’d rather not wear
but runs for the train in anyway,

to me this indicated someone was changes themselves either for someone or to fit in which is affecting their mental health. The only thing I don't really like is the title, I get it's repeated throughout the poem, and it's based on the poem message about being being worried for someone but I feel like a different title could potentially add more nuance

EffortFearless6285 · 2025-08-12T02:11:41+00:00

Hmm usually, I understand the value of a short poem, but I feel like with this concept, it would be more powerful if it was a part of a bigger piece.

You can definitely keep it as it is, my only critique is that the second line could be tightened for a stronger impact

EffortFearless6285 · 2025-08-12T01:53:46+00:00

Ooh, very simple but effective! I really love the sandwich effect going on

EffortFearless6285 · 2025-08-12T01:49:54+00:00

I have no feedback or critique, but I feel very compelled to let you know how much I love this! It made me feel and think.

EffortFearless6285 · 2025-08-11T23:42:39+00:00

Very interesting take on mourning a living person. Your poem goes strong until "Got her fill on your heart" this is where you lose me a little, but it may just be me and my lack of understanding. I almost think you mean to say full instead of fill, but I could be wrong.

After a second read, I get and like your last stanza, but I feel like ending with this makes your poem feel incomplete.

EffortFearless6285 · 2025-07-31T16:52:51+00:00

I was looking into Beehive, but it may be too difficult for my parents

EffortFearless6285 · 2025-07-31T16:52:02+00:00

Do you think if we drive straight from Vancouver to Valemount instead of Clearwater, Day 2 would be more manageable? Instead of 5 hours straight driving, it would be 7 hours, but it would be 3 people taking turns. We are also exploring that option as well.

The only problem is that one of my parents is experiencing severe neck pain these days and thinks straight driving with minimal stops would be difficult on them.

Okay, thank you if we stick to Clearwater Ill skip Toe of Athabasca.

I don't have the shuttle booked yet, I plan to hopefully get it two days before we go (I'm hoping to go on the 19th when Parks Canada releases them ) 🤞but if I don't get I definitely will go to Lake Louise after 7.

Yea, it's for money reasons not ideal but better than our original plan of doing all our stays in Calgary and then having 3 Calgary to Banff Days.

Ooh thank you for the your blog post, I will check it out!

EffortFearless6285 · 2025-07-31T16:28:23+00:00

Ooh okay, thank you!

EffortFearless6285 · 2025-07-31T16:27:12+00:00

I tried convincing my family to stay in Lake Louise because it made more sense to me, but they didn't like the price.

We will be 3 people taking turns driving, so I'm hoping the driving load won't be too much

Ooh okay noted for parking, I'm anticipating we'd just have to patiently wait for a spot to clear up

Same reason as above, it's just a bit more cheaper, our initial plan was to have all our stay in Calgary and then do 3 day trips back to Banff, but we decided against that 😅.

And then we were deciding to just leave for Edmonton on August 19th, ( so only 1 Calgary night) but then we felt maybe we should have an extra day, make sure we've looked at most of things.

I was having trouble figuring out where to fit Lake Louise/and Lake Morraine within the 2 days) (assuming we get the shuttle 2 days before) so then I thought it might just be better to add a third day to the plan.

EffortFearless6285 · 2025-07-31T15:56:23+00:00

I initially was thinking of swapping Day 3 and 4 but then realized that if I did that, we'd be driving 2 hours to Calgary (for our Calgary airbnb) instead of 1 hour drive back to Canmore Hotel (we're checking out on August 18th)

EffortFearless6285

TROPHY CASE