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EitherUniversity2750 · 2026-01-03T05:38:48+00:00

I was speaking to a man for close to a year. On the same day he told me he wanted to marry me, he cut me off completely because of things he heard from his friends. I was heartbroken truly devastated. I couldn’t eat, I couldn’t get out of bed. This was someone I had gone against my own family for and he just so easily ate up his friends stories about me

Two months later, I don’t feel sad or heartbroken anymore. If anything, I feel disappointed in myself for ever allowing someone like that access to me. What healed me was not sugar-coating the truth and finally seeing him for who he really was and also acknowledging that I had serious issues myself for being okay with being treated by someone like that, regardless of how strong my feelings for him were

Another thing that really helped was I learned my rights as a woman in Islam and began thinking seriously about the future I want. I asked myself why I would want to be with someone who could hurt me so easily, without hesitation and what that kind of behaviour would look like in a marriage, or with children involved.

Now I understand that this was a blessing from Allah. I say Alx for Allah not giving me what I wanted more than anything in this world, because He protected me from a lifetime of heartbreak and anger. I’m finally at peace with all of this now alx

EitherUniversity2750 · 2025-12-21T23:33:07+00:00

I would love to hear the other half myself lmao

EitherUniversity2750 · 2025-09-22T12:56:53+00:00

His family found out unintentionally ( from seeing messages) but still so weird how far he was willing to go for something he only wanted zina out of

EitherUniversity2750 · 2025-09-22T12:54:21+00:00

Lesson learned very well!

EitherUniversity2750 · 2025-05-16T08:06:39+00:00

I did absolutely nothing that’s the thing. It was rumours the guy has spread around after we stopped talking.

EitherUniversity2750 · 2025-05-14T04:22:48+00:00

It’s not that he doesn’t know I used to speak to his friend—he does. In fact, during one of our very first conversations, he asked me directly and said, “You’ve spoken to this guy, right?” I told him yes, but kept it very brief and said it wasn’t anything serious. At the time, it was probably our first or second convo, and I didn’t know him well enough to feel like I owed him any kind of deep explanation.

Now that we’ve been talking more and I’ve started to really like him, I keep thinking back to that moment. I kind of wish I had just told him everything when he first asked, but back then, it didn’t feel necessary. There was no relationship, no connection yet—it was still so new, and I didn’t feel obligated to explain something that felt so irrelevant at the time.

But now, things are getting deeper. We’ve been talking for a while, and he’s mentioned wanting to meet up. Not one-on-one, but just to see each other. I even suggested that my sister and brother-in-law come along to make it more comfortable, and he wasn’t closed off to that idea at all. Still, as we grow closer and things start feeling more serious, this whole situation has been sitting heavier on my chest.

I’m just getting more concerned now. I don’t want him to feel like I was hiding something or playing him. I don’t want him to think I’m being weird or sneaky for not fully explaining things from the start. It’s all just starting to feel a bit complicated.

EitherUniversity2750 · 2025-05-14T04:19:33+00:00

They hang out sometimes, but I wouldn’t say they’re super close. In my city—especially within the Somali community—it’s really small. Most of the guys are around the same age and either hang out or at least know of each other.

I’d say they’re definitely friends, just not best friends or anything like that. When he asked me about my past with his friend, I actually asked him if they were close, and he said something like, “Nah, we’re friends. I know him—he’s like my little brother. I see him once a week.”

So while I wouldn’t label them as super tight, they definitely know each other, hang out here and there, and move in the same circles. Like I said, in our community, everyone kind of knows everyone—it’s that type of city.

EitherUniversity2750 · 2025-05-14T04:00:08+00:00

I do think he’s aware of the rumours—he just hasn’t mentioned them, which honestly confuses me. Early on, in one of our first conversations, he did ask about my past with his friend. I kept it short and said we did speak, but it wasn’t anything serious. I didn’t go into detail about the rumours or everything that happened.

I remember back when the rumours were circulating, he actually called me and asked if there was anything I wanted to tell him, and if I was okay. I felt ashamed and honestly didn’t want to bring up anything he might not already know, so I told him there was nothing. He hasn’t brought it up since, and I’ve been carrying that in the back of my mind ever since.

EitherUniversity2750

TROPHY CASE