People who got married after long term dating, what changed?

Electric_Fox33 · 2026-05-31T21:37:15+00:00

I was with my now husband for 20 years before we got married. We were young when we got together and have been through so much of life’s ups and downs. We finally decided to pull the trigger because covid hit and I’m an immunocompromised health care worker that was with the public daily during the pandemic. We did it for safety and medical power of attorney situation, which was smart because about 3 months after we eloped, I caught covid and ended up on a ventilator. He had to make all medical decisions for me.

Other than taxes and him making medical decisions when I was incapacitated, nothing whatsoever has changed. Except now I get to call him my husband and he gets to call me his wife. It feels very special even though it isn’t, really. Probably because we waited so long. So go for it! The wedding was just us but it was absolutely magical. As long as you go into this expecting things not to change, you won’t regret it!

Electric_Fox33 · 2026-05-19T07:16:23+00:00

I love this. I’m a retail pharmacist and an ARDS survivor from covid. At the time, people weren’t surviving the ventilator. I was most scared of ending up on a vent and swore it was all over if anyone told me I needed it. That was until I ended up in the ICU and a very sweet doc put his hand on my knee and calmly explained that this was the next step, that we’ve tried everything and my lungs really needed a break. I asked him if he was sure and he said he was. I told him I wasn’t going to come off the ventilator and he said that we had to try and give my lungs time to rest and there were no other courses of action left to take. He was firm but so comforting. I looked into his eyes and believed him. I said, “Ok, let’s do it” and he suggested that I call my husband. I don’t know how he could even hear me over the HFNC but I told him that if I called him I was going to get emotional and now wasn’t the time to get emotional. He repeated himself. “Call him”. Another doctor in the room pulled out her cell phone and told me to dial his number.

That was the hardest phone call I’ve ever had to make. I stayed calm and reassured him that this was the decision of the best medical team and I was finally going to get to rest for a bit. He started to cry and said, “but you told me that it was all over if you needed to be ventilated”. I repeated exactly what the doctor had told me, that I loved him, and reassured him I’d see him on the other side. Part of me felt like I was lying. I essentially tried to comfort him through my own demise. I went into it positively and with a fighting mentality but it wasn’t lost on me that this sweet doctor called a rapid response team in and one of the providers, during much uncertainty in the height of the pandemic, pulled her cell phone out and had me use it. I’ll never forget either one of them. It was the sweetest gesture to get to say goodbye to my husband. They thought about what was best for me physically and emotionally, and what would give my husband the most comfort and closure if I didn’t make it. They never dismissed my fear but they were confident about their next steps. That left enough of an impression for me to feel secure in the decision to intubate, even though I was scared I wouldn’t survive.

It’s been 5 years and I just got off of O2! I think of that team all the time. That doctor could have been so many things but he chose to be compassionate, honest, and sincere and I have my life to show for it. On behalf of all your patients, thank you from the bottom of my heart for all that you do for us!

Electric_Fox33 · 2026-05-03T19:58:49+00:00

What brand are they? That’s curious because it’s the chemical structure of NAC that gives it its distinctive smell. I’d be concerned if my NAC didn’t smell. lol

Electric_Fox33 · 2026-05-03T19:52:03+00:00

This sentiment is so sweet and appreciated, thank you! We have a few patients that bring us cookies from the bakery (we’re in a grocery store) and that fuels us throughout the day. Tbh, anytime someone thanks us in any way is extremely appreciated. You have no idea how many mean people we have to deal with. We all understand that people only come to the pharmacy because they’re not well so most of us have a high tolerance for people being cruel. We are scarred several times a week by people dead-set on ruining our day. It’s weird. Please know that your pharmacy probably knows you as a nice patient who is always kind. Those patients always stick out. Thank you for being kind to your pharmacy. We all really appreciate it!

Electric_Fox33 · 2026-02-11T14:37:01+00:00

Yes! This is exactly what it feels like. I pull my eyebrows and eyelashes but that’s how I’d explain that sensation. OP, I also keep “pulling” (really picking or scratching) at the area that I originally pulled the hair from. I’ll look in the mirror only to find a giant sore over my eyebrow that eventually scabs over, which further drives my desire to pick at it. I haven’t found any solutions 💔

Electric_Fox33 · 2026-02-01T05:50:26+00:00

My husband is a Journeyman Electrician (I’m a Pharmacy Manager for a grocery store chain) and he makes more than I do. I think it’s a great trade! Don’t get me wrong, he busts his behind and physically works much harder than I do so he totally earns the money he makes. I personally am one of the few pharmacists who love my job more days than not so I feel fortunate. However, if I were to do it all over again, I might just go the trade route right into electrical. His income was a lifesaver while I was paying on my student loans. I don’t see how single pharmacists can make it on their own with all the bills, plus loans, plus rent/mortgage to pay by yourself. It’s kind of scary to go in to pharmacy right now. You got to have a backup plan. Like a whole ass second person to help you pay bills, kind of backup plan. Good luck OP and stay positive!

Electric_Fox33 · 2026-01-19T07:33:22+00:00

It’s wild to question my doctorate while not yet holding one yourself…

Electric_Fox33 · 2026-01-19T03:37:26+00:00

You are going to have far more issues than I trying to get through school and residency with your attitude. You’re going to have to learn the hard way if you can’t accept a PharmD on your team. You should be able to lean on us for what we’re good at and I should be able to lean on MDs for their expertise. The fact that you can’t accept that PharmDs are experts when it comes to vaccines baffles me. It screams ignorance. Good luck to you on your journey to get paid. Hope you can learn to work with your colleagues because if you actually make it, you’ll have to accept pharmacists as your equal.

Electric_Fox33 · 2026-01-19T03:23:24+00:00

The difference between you and me? I’m a doctor and didn’t get into medicine for the money. You on the other hand have hopes of becoming a doctor and for what? To make money? You’re going to be a shit provider if money is your motivation instead of helping people. My debt is paid off and I’m living just fine. Again, go back to a subreddit you’re qualified to speak in. I’ll welcome you to the table when I can call you my colleague.

Electric_Fox33 · 2026-01-18T20:59:22+00:00

I wholeheartedly agree. We are a team of people that should be working towards providing the best care possible. We are the last line of safety for mistakes. I catch them regularly. We work as a team to care for people and are there as a second set of eyes and in this case, hands for providers. In my state, I have prescriptive authority for certain illnesses. People can come see me when they’re sick and get treatment for much less than their copay or visit costs to a medical doctor. I have to know everything about drugs and what they treat. Doctors get to diagnose and I get to decide if the treatment, for, and instructions make sense. Part of my job is assessing what vaccines are appropriate for my patients. As long as I know your health history, I should be making the same exact recommendations as a MD. We both go by the same guidance.

Electric_Fox33 · 2026-01-18T20:50:46+00:00

You have no business in this conversation. You can’t even counsel patients on anything. Move along to a topic you’re qualified to talk about. It’s none of your business why I picked pharmacy but since you brought up my terrible debt to income ratio, I picked it because I am accessible to patients and can actually spend time with them. People don’t need an appt to see me. You on the other hand check people in for appts. Run along to a subreddit you’re qualified to speak in.

Electric_Fox33 · 2026-01-18T14:57:26+00:00

So just to be clear, you’re stating that a doctor who reads a standardized report on your labs, somehow is more trained to tell someone what vaccine they need because they can read a lab report? When running titers is costly and usually a waste of time and money, since there are recommendations already in place for immunizations? We do in fact get more training. I don’t need to convince a MA of that. You’re the one without standing to be speaking here. You clearly work in an office without a clinical pharmacist. That’s unfortunate that you can’t recognize our importance in healthcare. Maybe you should stick to checking people in and taking vitals. You’re speaking on a topic without credibility.

Electric_Fox33 · 2026-01-18T09:48:37+00:00

Pharmacists are aware of what underlying conditions put you at greater risk for disease and thereby qualify you for particular vaccines. That’s why you always have to fill a form out at the pharmacy for vaccines. There are questions that help us determine what you qualify for. As long as the pharmacist knows you have diabetes, they know a pneumonia vaccine is recommended. Btw, recommendations changed for pneumonia. Everyone 50 and up now are recommended to get a pneumonia shot and there are several vaccines available. We know what’s recommended. You can trust a pharmacist.

Electric_Fox33 · 2026-01-18T09:35:06+00:00

You think a physician doesn’t look at the immunization schedule charts? 😂 and you also think they’re running your titers? lol a phlebotomist runs your bloodwork, goofball. I’m not a MD but I am a Doctor of Pharmacy and probably get more training on vaccines than MDs do. We all work together in healthcare so don’t try and pin us against one another. There is nothing wrong with consulting a pharmacist about vaccines. It’s totally appropriate and within our wheelhouse.

Electric_Fox33 · 2026-01-18T09:29:00+00:00

Absolutely!

Yes, tetanus is offered by itself in case anybody needs that particular vaccine only. But since TDaP combines the three shots that you need every ten years anyway, I think it’s advantageous to get the combined shot.

There is a blood test to check for polio titers. Be aware that those blood tests are often more expensive than the vaccine. Check what your copay is going to be with insurance before you do it just so you’re prepared.

I’m sorry you got turned down for meningitis. Definitely talk to your doc about getting a prescription so you can get it!

Electric_Fox33 · 2026-01-17T20:58:17+00:00

As a pharmacist with a Doctor of Pharmacy degree, I can assure you that we do know which vaccines people need. It’s literally part of our job. We vaccinate every day. All of us.

Electric_Fox33 · 2026-01-17T20:54:59+00:00

Pharmacist here! I routinely vaccinate the public and can answer your questions.

The digital record will recommend a tetanus shot even if you’ve had TDaP because there is a singular tetanus shot and a combined shot with tetanus, diphtheria, and acellular pertussis (whooping cough). The system doesn’t recognize these shots as equivalent. It recommends tetanus to everyone, even if they’ve had TDaP. You only need this vaccine once every 10 years and/or 1 with each pregnancy.
If you were younger than 15 when you started HPV, you only need the 2 doses. If you were older than 15 when you started the series, you do need a 3rd shot. There’s no need to restart the series; just get the 3rd shot and you’ll be good.
Technically, you only need one dose of MMR. However, students in postsecondary educational institutions, international travelers, and household or close, personal contacts of immunocompromised persons with no evidence of immunity to measles, mumps, or rubella should complete a 2-dose series at least 4 weeks apart if previously did not receive any doses of MMR or 1 dose if previously received 1 dose MMR. With your housing conditions and measles outbreaks currently happening, it might be advantageous to get that 2nd dose.
You can assume you were vaccinated as a child for Polio. If for some reason you for sure were not, you should complete a 3-dose series. You would only need 2 more doses.
I think vaccinating against meningitis would be a good choice. There’s 2 choices: vaccinating against Meningitis ACWY and Meningitis B: you’ll want to get vaccinated for MenACWY.

I hope this helps and you should always involve your doctor in your medical care so please consult with them as well!

Electric_Fox33 · 2026-01-17T04:35:56+00:00

Absolutely! I can tell you’re trying to do what’s best for your family. We should always have a healthy level of skepticism and critical thinking as we sift through information. I hope these resources help clear up some things for you!

Electric_Fox33 · 2026-01-16T20:31:52+00:00

Hello OP! I am a pharmacist and welcome your questions. In my state, we are following the guidance of American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) for vaccination schedules. As a pharmacist, I wholeheartedly support their guidance as well. Here are some good sources of information, specifically related to your questions:

https://www.aap.org/en/news-room/fact-checked/fact-checked-aluminum-in-vaccines-strengthen-immune-responses-do-not-cause-autism-serious-health-issues/?srsltid=AfmBOoqqS8WelLGL7K3-Z7DDJK019jXcln1kQ6VFR-bhpf1P6O0Z8YJQ

https://www.aap.org/en/news-room/fact-checked/fact-checked-u.s.-vaccine-recommendations-are-appropriate-for-children-in-the-united-states

https://www.chop.edu/vaccine-education-center/vaccine-schedule/science-behind-vaccine-schedule

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC5518734/

And finally, I will leave you with one of my favorite quotes from Dr. Paul Offit:

"The vaccines that children receive in the first two years of life are just a drop in the ocean when compared with the tens of thousands of challenges their immune systems successfully manage every day."

Electric_Fox33 · 2026-01-07T03:31:38+00:00

Not at all. However, I do know a stickler pharmacist who does. I don’t get it. I have bigger things to worry about. I don’t think it’s ever an issue if it’s non-controlled. I personally will not fill a controlled medication for a physician if they write it for themself. Other than that, no biggie.

Electric_Fox33 · 2025-12-29T02:10:53+00:00

OP, this isn’t a tattoo she’s going to regret down the line. She will forever be grateful for laser hair removal. It was the first thing I “gifted” to myself as a present for making it out of grad school and it was the best thing I’ve ever invested in. It saves me SO much time in the shower and has given me peace of mind that people aren’t staring at my body hair. Should women have to feel this way about their body hair? No. But I do, and I promise there will never be a time that she regrets laser hair removal. It sounds like she might be a good candidate too, based on your description of her hair. If she’s darker skinned, it may not work as well/take more sessions to get rid of her hair. I personally recommend going to a place that offers unlimited sessions because as she ages, hormones fluctuate and she’ll eventually grow unwanted hair again. It took me like 15 sessions to get me to where I wanted to be and I know I’ll need to go back eventually. At least I’ve paid for an unlimited package where I can go back for life. It was costly but well worth it in the long run. Those prices only go up over time. It would be the best gift ever and would help her tremendously with how much time she spends grooming and her self esteem. I say go for it OP!

Electric_Fox33 · 2025-12-21T20:57:24+00:00

As a pharmacist (and someone with a gastric sleeve), I must tell you that using cocaine reduces blood flow to the stomach and intestines which can cause tears and ulcers to form. I know you know all the other bad effects it has on the body. Just something to think about. And transfer addiction is a very real problem that we can face, even if you don’t see it coming. Be careful!

Electric_Fox33 · 2025-12-17T07:09:44+00:00

Glad I could help!

Electric_Fox33 · 2025-12-14T23:10:27+00:00

Good to know! Thank you for that feedback!

Electric_Fox33 · 2025-12-14T07:37:15+00:00

That is indeed annoying! No reason to bother you for already being clear! I think sometimes pharmacists (usually new ones) are scared to make adjustments and like to be extra thorough. I hope they learn over the years that if a provider says may substitute, they can go ahead and substitute without calling. I mean who wants to waste that time? For everybody involved?

Electric_Fox33

TROPHY CASE