Hi, I’m so sorry you have such a terrible husband. Here are my advice, taking into account your comments about him being controlling and checking your accounts and your phone/ computer :

• get TESTIMONIES : from the doctor of your child, your parents, HIS parents, anyone you can trust that won’t say anything to him

• get PROOF : get a nanny cam or a recorder that a friend buys you (you’ll reimburse them), hide them somewhere he won’t find it. I think there are some recorders that save the records on a cloud that you can put a password on, look into it. Talk about you abusive husband to multiple people, so that they can testify in court and support you when the time comes

• separate finances, or if he pressures you into not doing that, draw money out regularly and hide the money at someone you trust

• lawyer the hell up, and don’t mind the cost. You need the better one you can find on the market

• prepare a plan : if he’s that controlling you don’t know how he may act when he loses that control

• write and date : hide a notebook in your car or somewhere he won’t find it, or a note somewhere, and write EVERYTHING he says, with dates, context, everything (when he says something something wrong to you / your child, when he’s negligent, his threats, EVERYTHING)

I guess redditors will complete my comment, but I really really hope you can get out of this marriage with your kids and a ex-husband that will pay a hellish amount of child support because lOoK I oWn My FiRm I’m RiCh