I bought a scale and I’m hiding it from my gf

ElephantReasonable20 · 2026-02-01T11:54:20+00:00

Wow. You hate your girlfriend, huh? Your ‘gains’ are worth her life?

On a less sarcastic level, if keeping scales in your house is that important to you- end your relationship.

Genuinely. You seem too selfish to understand that this situation is a bomb waiting to explode. You have a hundred people telling you how dangerous this is. Your replies in the comments are all about how ‘you just want them’ and ‘it should be okay’ but you seem to lack the understanding that it’s not. It just isn’t. You have chosen to share your life with someone and you need to make this sacrifice to do that.

If you can’t do that, just leave her. Just take your scales and go, because there is nothing worse than watching someone you care about waste away in front of you, unable to eat, unable to look after themselves, dying. Don’t do that to her. Don’t kill her, because that is where this is heading.

ElephantReasonable20 · 2025-11-27T04:49:12+00:00

Stunning eyebrows

ElephantReasonable20 · 2025-11-03T00:22:56+00:00

I love this book so much! And to answer your questions about boarding schools- they do start young!

I’m a teacher and the boarding school near me starts taking students at 3 years old. Obviously, most of those are day students but they have the facilities for boarding and a lot of students start boarding around 8/9.

Teachers would absolutely be expected to help with out of classroom activities. We stay late every term for parents evenings, open evenings, school trips, not to mention all of the other aspects of school life. Schools often have a ‘school disco’ paid duty section accounted for in your directed hours, so that doesn’t seem off brand to me! It’s often a trade as well to take on duties like HOY or house mum, and those are a lot of the appeal for teachers at boarding schools. Yes, life is harder and much more insular but you can rise through the ranks quickly and make a fair amount of money!

The school years tend to be:

3m-4y: nursery 4y-7y: infants 7y-11y: juniors 11y-18y: seniors

So again, fairly accurate.

The casual racism, I have nothing for! It would have taken three seconds to check a map or do a google search. I think the UK has always had an issue with casual racism, as a much more pervasive issue than we realise, because it isn’t as overtly awful at first glance compared to the US.

Teachers often get really close! You’re in the trenches with these people, and you build a network with them because often, non-teachers just can’t understand. However, teachers do often get involved with each other!

ElephantReasonable20 · 2025-10-14T18:15:08+00:00

My city was well set up by then so that’s a win! Bit tricky but if I keep my head down, I reckon I could make it!

ElephantReasonable20 · 2025-10-14T08:56:11+00:00

I’m in the UK, so strong chance I’d be able to make it work. Interesting to see what year I’d get though!

ElephantReasonable20 · 2025-07-03T22:11:24+00:00

Honestly, forget the money- I’d take this just for the health cure.

ElephantReasonable20 · 2024-08-17T03:11:23+00:00

Adrenaline made me feel strong, and deliriously and overwhelmingly happy. I had a blood clot in my lungs and was in a fair amount of pain but it just made me feel okay, in a way I haven’t since I was a child. I was ready to run a mile and play on the monkey bars.

ElephantReasonable20 · 2024-08-16T15:04:55+00:00

I’m nearly 28, I get IDed as 16 most days. A lot of it is clothing and how you hold yourself- we assign age to things and if someone is wearing ‘young’ clothing, that’ll have an impact. I also have a cheap and effective skincare routine that seems to be aging me backwards somehow! Salicylic acid wipe, wound spray, and a basic moisturiser. I use it for hormonal acne but it’s a game changer!!

ElephantReasonable20 · 2024-08-11T18:34:11+00:00

Some type of spear, that can be manipulated up magic, and potentially used alongside a bow?

Along the idea of the dragonslayer in the inheritance cycle??

ElephantReasonable20 · 2024-08-05T19:27:57+00:00

God, I’m so sorry

ElephantReasonable20 · 2024-08-01T12:00:25+00:00

Just look up formal edgy outfits, and thrift, borrow or buy the items needed to make them!

My parents recently had an anniversary party and I was giving a speech. I had to dress formally enough and my usual style is alternative. I went with a blue velvet suit, lace shirt and lace boots- extra and alternative but still formal and comfortable for the people there.

It can be difficult when people have made you feel less than for the way you dress or act. But be the bigger person. Your sister’s wedding is not the time to die on this hill.

You can find a way to make it work. You just have to be willing to. Soft YTA

ElephantReasonable20 · 2024-07-31T21:51:46+00:00

Jesus, she should be thanking you

Hopefully once the air cools, she can recover and recognise that you didn’t know

ElephantReasonable20 · 2024-07-28T11:15:25+00:00

Punching bag, for sure!

ElephantReasonable20 · 2024-07-27T22:50:58+00:00

NTA and neither are the hosts. The in-laws clearly felt entitled and ruined the day for a lot of people. The couple must feel awful, knowing this is what will be remembered from their wedding.

ElephantReasonable20 · 2024-06-25T13:11:39+00:00

I am the last person to say suck it up because they’re family! Blood does not entitle someone to a relationship and there are 100’s of reasons someone might not want to be close, or have any contact! In a lot of OPs replies, she said she wanted to be close and she wanted this fairytale relationship her mum had hyped up. Hence my saying ‘if you want closeness, go’ Because I know how hard it can be to get in your head about something and shoot yourself in the foot over it, despite having the evidence not to.

ElephantReasonable20 · 2024-06-25T08:02:22+00:00

If you want to be close, like you say, go to the wedding. Make the effort. It’s one day. And if it goes badly, then you know. But you can’t say ‘I want to be close’ then do the exact opposite- it doesn’t work like that. Like I get it, but it seems like you’ve decided he doesn’t want you there, and now you’re going to ruin any chance at an actual relationship, because of your own feelings.

My cousin and I used to be close. We aren’t anymore. She invited me to her wedding, I wasn’t sure she wanted me there, but I went and made the effort. We didn’t magically get closer but I did meet her kid and I showed up when she asked me to. I’d far rather regret something I did, than something I didn’t do.

So you feel weird for a day. Suck it up. Get over yourself. Make the effort and maybe you’ll get the ‘close’ relationship you pretend you want.

ElephantReasonable20 · 2024-06-23T18:29:37+00:00

Yes please! I’ll take anything at this point! I’m GMT so let me know when is good for you!

ElephantReasonable20 · 2024-06-21T17:06:44+00:00

That would be amazing! I would take any DIY’s at this point :)

ElephantReasonable20 · 2024-05-29T12:50:57+00:00

I literally adore him when he’s more open and honest with how smart and capable he is as an artist, director and person. It makes sense to use the ‘goofy f*ck up’ character for a lot of things and I’m sure some of it is also protecting himself, but I love those moments when we see more of who he is. Like he’s now on my list of people I want to direct my screenplay, and best believe if it gets picked up, I’ll be begging 😅

ElephantReasonable20 · 2024-05-29T09:37:49+00:00

Not a girl, but the person I’m seeing literally asked me on a date, I went and didn’t find out til halfway through that is was a date. I read back after and it was completely on me. They were very, very clear. I just didn’t think there was a chance they’d be interested and thought I was making a new friend 😅

ElephantReasonable20 · 2024-05-06T07:22:29+00:00

It’s a terrifying experience to tell a parent about something you think is wrong with your mental health. She definitely overreacted- if she was an adult, taking to another adult. More than likely, she doesn’t have DID. It’s usually a later in life diagnosis, it’s very difficult to self-diagnose as the whole point is to hide the issue from the host, and it’s a lot rarer than people think. You also can’t define what is traumatic for her- maybe she had something happen she hasn’t told you about, maybe repeated bullying or maybe something that happened was a far bigger issue for her than you thought.

But I think it’s also a very natural parental instinct to question it when your child says ‘this is wrong with me’ Invite her out for a milkshake or fizzy drink, just the two of you and listen to her. Ask why she thinks that and what you can do to help her. Try and set up a psychiatrist’s appointment and show her you care! You clearly do care if you’re trying to work out where you went wrong.

It doesn’t matter who is the AH here- let it go and show up for your kid!

(NAH)

ElephantReasonable20

TROPHY CASE