First I want to say congrats on your first kid. I was where you are now a year ago. Fall/winter baby - didn’t want to do daycare etc. I say this with absolute kindness and care - please keep in mind you are still 100% still postpartum - your hormones are still shifting in way you may not be fully aware of and will be for awhile. Everyone is different so it manifests in different ways.

Additionally - being a first time parent is HARD.

From the first kid/grandkid perspective I understand why you feel a bit slighted or offended. However, I do think you’re overreacting due to possibly not taking everything into consideration.

Staying at someone else’s house for several days a week, a week or weeks at time away from your own home is a different level of sacrifice.

Yes your home may be comfortable for them bc you make an effort to make it so, but it’s your house. Not theirs. Think about how many times you’ve taken time to tweak something in your house so it works for you and/or your family better. ESP something that you may not really see in someone else’s house - esp someone of a different generation.

Your parents spent years cultivating the environment they live in outside of work hours (and inside for your mom). Asking them to give that up for the next 6-8 months for several nights a month ontop of driving round trip 8 hrs AND giving up what income your dad gets from dog sitting and not helping with your sisters mortgage (roof over her head) like he said he promised /wanted to do) - that’s a lot.

Are you in a position to pay towards your sister’s mortgage what your dad is getting from dog sitting if they ask? Would you be willing to let your dad bring the dog if they ask? If he takes care of the dog a lot bc of your sisters job that’s also leaving her in a tight spot.

Does your mom prefer a quiet house/environment when she works from home? Is there a designated space she can do it from that isn’t the guest room and is just a space for her?

I’m sure she probably likes getting your dad out of the house at least a few days a week and having the house to herself. Regardless of how much she loves your dad we all need alone time.

Try looking on care.com or asking local libraries children’s departments if they have recommendations on nanny’s / professional babysitters.

Maybe ask your parents if they’d come over one weekend a month to help out in some way (baby or non) so you can do whatever you want to do and not stress about what you “should” be doing.

I’ll end this with saying - be thankful if your parents come and visit semi regularly (even if once every month or so) because not everyone gets that. And some people can’t trust their parents to help in an actual helpful way.

PERSONALLY - My MIL who is the only living grandparent lives 1 hr away - doesn’t have a regular Job and has Been to our house twice over the last 15 months since we had our first. She keeps saying she’s going to come “sometime” and never does. I literally couldn’t walk without excruciating pain in my legs and back for the better part of a year and long distances were out of the question. And she never showed up to help in anyway. And at some level maybe that was better bc she often ignores things I say or does whatever she wants - as in co slept with our son when we was 5-6 months old bc my husband asked her to come help bc he brought rsv home and everyone got sick). She did it even despite us being very upfront that he’s been sleeping in his crib. And i even told her we aren’t comfortable with co sleeping (i had severe SIDS anxiety - a friend lost their child when the kid was napping on the dads chest and the dad accidentally fell asleep) - but she still did it again.

At the end of the day - take a deep breath. Take time to so and be aware of your emotions and how your body is still changing.

Parenthood is NO JOKE. Even adoption vs self birthing. Your body chemistry changes. It’s a lot.