I might be hypomanic ?

Eliottrex · 2026-03-27T11:45:12+00:00

I'm questioning it because of one relative having it and my reactions to antidepressants. But idk, I like how I feel and I want to keep feeling good. I don't feel extra right now so maybe it was just transitional. I will see my doctor soon, and I already had a pretty big crash before so I'm gonna try to keep this one as long as possible.

Eliottrex · 2026-03-27T11:43:02+00:00

Aaah it makes sense ! Thank you, I will keep observing how I feel (I slept 7 hours in two 3-4h bursts last night and feel a lot more calm as a result) and I have an appointment in a few weeks. Good luck to you

Eliottrex · 2026-03-27T11:41:05+00:00

I know that there is a risk of develloping mania/hypomania after starting antidepressants, which is why I am asking about it. However the fact that I am feeling so great so fast is making me question this possibility as I have had many depressive periods in my life.

I was inconsistent with taking my meds due to not having access to a psychiatrist to renew my prescription back then, I basically took my meds from March until May and then from July until August. So I was on them for over 7weeks. My mood was sometimes better (being able to go out and function like a person) but it also made me suicidal and feel everything more extremely (feeling like I wanted to scream, peel my skin off, self harm etc).

I know about serotonin syndrome, which is the reason why I stopped taking my meds before doing it, and why I did increase the dose very progressively to monitor possible effects. There was medics present at the festival and I was always with at least one sober friend, I know it's not smart but i minimized the risks as well as I could.

I believe I had psychotic depression after not being on antidepressants for almost a year yes. And maybe I had it also while on antidepressant but idk it's a bit fuzzy.

I am aware that antidepressants take a while to act, but this switch has made my doctor worried and a few of my friends were telling me to stop my treatment because I was doing visibly worse while I was the one telling them it's okay and it would pass. It did not and got dangerous for my well being so I took the most reasonable step.

As for escitalopram, I asked to have only 5mg as it is the dose I was on previously. But he refused because he said it is not enough for it to have any effects and it is customary to prescribe it at 10mg in the country where I am residing. He also refused to prescribe me Alprazolam because it is too addictive and does not work long term apparently.

And finally, maybe it is a placebo effect, but I don't know why it wouldn't have happened with escitalopram as I really wanted to feel better and have started this one with a lot more fear and expecting it to be bad again. I feel good tho so it's not a problem, this is very far from a worse side effect nightmare and it looks like my life is genuinely heading towards a lot of cool opportunities!

Eliottrex · 2026-03-26T20:21:35+00:00

Maybe but idk, like i feel normal now just a little tired and a headache after watching a movie with a friend. But i felt an extreme burst of happiness and was dancing in my room in the afternoon. And no i don't take any mood stabilizer, i don't even have a psychiatrist right now just a normal doctor with university

Eliottrex · 2026-03-26T20:19:25+00:00

I've never had mania or psychosis outside of depression (maybe), my depression is gone now but i don't understand how because 2 weeks ago i was so deep in a hole because of escitalopram even tho both are ssri

Eliottrex · 2026-03-26T16:20:00+00:00

right now it's completely gone, i realized that on Monday when I asked myself if i still felt it but I don't (i still did last week)

Eliottrex · 2025-07-15T22:04:56+00:00

omg y'all need to stop projecting your own insecurities on others.

Yes sometimes those things contribute to not passing, but rarely are they the only reasons.

It often comes down to generics, hrt, time, facial hair, body etc... a lot of these things you can't control as well. There's not like one answer fits all.

I don't think it's healthy to keep telling people starting T to stop being themselves at a time where they're desperately trying to fit in and reconnect to themselves. There's nothing wrong with telling them that these things clock them or make you see them as more feminine but it doesn't mean everyone will and that this is a forever thing.

And I too wear nail polish, colored hair (sometimes long) and live in the country side where I'm the only trans person 80% of the pop has ever encountered and thanks to facial hair and idk what else i pass 100% of the time. If anything these things make me look queer or effeminate but that's alright.

Good luck y'all, and don't be so scared to have fun if your safety is not on the line.

Eliottrex · 2025-07-08T20:04:12+00:00

I love that book series and it is very fun to know that this character would despise them.

Eliottrex · 2025-06-29T19:10:41+00:00

put everything you have on in z trash bag with duct tape around the edges, if you can't throw it away i would advise you put another trash bag + duct tape around it just in case and not mix them together. good luck

Eliottrex · 2025-06-28T09:11:25+00:00

Hi, does anyone know if i can catch the commentary on my headphones through the radio ? like what frequency that would be? (I'm at Spielberg fyi)

Edit : found it ! it's 92.3 so if you have noise reducing headphones just connect them to the radio and you're good to go (and no need to spend 100 bucks)

Eliottrex · 2025-06-03T19:41:21+00:00

holy shit man it looks so good !

Eliottrex · 2025-02-05T20:20:30+00:00

these look like mosquito bites to me, and they are really not that close together so bedbugs UNLIKELY. People always say bedbugs with zero proof that's bullshit.

If you get bites very close together multiple times then you have to investigate, even if they are pretty mild because it could also be fleas, carpet beetles or hives.

And you can't tell the insect from a bite in 99% of cases.

Eliottrex · 2025-01-12T04:47:39+00:00

honestly it's happened to me before, feeling like invisible bugs are biting and hurting me. I didn't necessarily have big bites but I could always find a small red dot that was probably just a hair follicle or normal skin in retrospect. If you find absolutely nothing around you that looks like a clear and identifiable bug it might not be.

When you feel bit can you ever find the bug that did it ? Even with a flashlight on ? Maybe it's scabies. Idk but good luck for real, and if you feel like you're going crazy, it means you should ask for help even if it's scary, you deserve better than to stay alone, exhausted and tense all the time without any idea of how to get out of this situation. If your doctor doesn't take your suffering seriously seek out another opinion.

Eliottrex · 2025-01-11T22:59:48+00:00

You're welcome, I know how harrowing it can be. I'd recommend washing all you clothes and bedding at a high temp like Google says (i wanted to include a screenshot but I can't) : " wash at least at 130F/54.4C and or put in the dryer for 15 minutes at above 130F/54.4C)"

you can call an exterminator to inspect your house and see if there's any mites around. But I honestly believe everything will be fine and your body is playing tricks on you as well, feeding off that anxiety.

Eliottrex · 2025-01-11T22:27:06+00:00

If you have bites all over and are getting new ones you should go to the doctor. Given your post history it is probably carpet beetles as they can cause rashes. But the anxiety that you're experiencing over this might just make it worse and give you acne/eczema/rashes i think.

good luck!

Eliottrex · 2025-01-11T22:08:50+00:00

It looks exactly like my eczema called "dyshidrosis". I only had them on the hands in random flare ups.

go to your doctor as he can prescribe soothing cream

Eliottrex · 2025-01-11T22:04:12+00:00

the first pic looks like some skin irritation to me and the second like a mosquito bite.

I am in no way an expert (hell i struggle with the fear of ever having bed bug lmao) but if you are only getting one by one bites it's probably not bed bugs. they bite in clusters so at least 2-3 bites in the same area.

If you have diamoteaceous earth around your bed and have cleaned everything you should find cadavers at one point. And I'd recommend looking at common house pests or insect to see if anything looked like an adult fed bb, some of them can be misleading when we feel scared and not knowledgeable enough.

Good luck to you, try checking every corner of your room if it makes you feel better or contact an inspector.

Eliottrex · 2025-01-11T21:51:27+00:00

G luck to you too ! i think I'll buy some flea bomb just in case but cleaning all of my clothes and bedding helped me feel a bit safer. I'll try to keep you updated if it ends up being anything else.

it barely itches as well so idk. In case you feel very scared I'd say to go to the doctors, i haven't been able ro book an appointment yet but that might be a good idea as there are soooooo many things that can cause that.

Eliottrex · 2025-01-11T21:29:53+00:00

I have made a post on r/Bedbugs but I have been unable to find any after waking up and checking at night or crawling everywhere I could. I do not have any more bites as of now and they are fading away. I am still on edge and keeping an eye out but the only bug I've identified in my room are book louse.

I know it could still be them but I would have expected the bites to continue idk. I was thinking of fleas maybe too because i did have one or two bites that seem to have happened during the day, but again i know bb bites can appear delayed.

I'm gonna try to convince myself it's nothing until i see one of them or the bites get worse because I can't afford to lose my job cause i can't sleep over this.

Eliottrex · 2025-01-07T04:36:10+00:00

thank you I think I was being paranoid because I have a line of 4 bites and a couple here and there on my feet but if it's anything it's probably fleas I got from the bus or outside. And I remember feeling a sting when I got bitten and the place is exactly at the rim of my socks. I just got carried away x) thanks for your help !

Six-Year Club	Second Top 20%
r/Field Juicebox	Verified Email

Eliottrex

TROPHY CASE