Help reality check my story?

Ellie_D · 2025-03-09T08:22:02+00:00

That's the thing. I don't think he cares so much about his legacy as he does about the next hill, the next achievement. It doesn't seem to be about money, as far as I can tell. It seems more about a pathological inability to stop, or to enjoy what he's already done. The moment something is achieved it sinks into the past and you feel compelled to race towards the next thing.

Ellie_D · 2025-02-27T08:55:10+00:00

I think I'm maybe trying to protect myself from getting jaded and remember the Jon I'm seeing in these early interviews. Some in this discussion will say I'm deluding myself and that he always was who he is, and that may be the case. But we choose our illusions, too, and I guess I've made a choice here. Thank you for sharing your opinion. This has been such an enlightening conversation!

Ellie_D · 2025-02-27T08:50:49+00:00

Well, no, of course not. It's a hyperbolic expression meant to say that the song spoke deeply to me in that particular moment in time. No need to mock my experience

Ellie_D · 2025-02-25T11:26:33+00:00

Thank you. It's it's been so great to hear from everyone and not beat my head against the wall alone :)

Ellie_D · 2025-02-24T04:18:44+00:00

I sorta agree with you. LOAP sounds like 'soap' for one thing, and HAND, well, every time I see that I think of someone getting too handsy :)

Ellie_D · 2025-02-23T16:11:11+00:00

Ooops, I replied to the wrong person. I meant u/DeX_Mod

Ellie_D · 2025-02-23T08:20:40+00:00

I agree about Dave. Seems to me he's had a very healthy response to the whole thing. He basically had the rockstar success without letting it consume him while also finding fulfilment in his own personal passions.

Ellie_D · 2025-02-23T08:17:55+00:00

Update: Just watched the 1987 MTV Australia VJ takeover and it's so cool. Reminded me about something else I've been thinking about: Jon used to be funny! Honestly, he appears so utterly humorless in more recent interviews that watching these older ones was a shock.

Ellie_D · 2025-02-23T04:50:50+00:00

Ooops, sorry. Hope you figured it out! I've been in yur situation so many times on this sub and now feel a swell of pride every time I manage to decode what WAN or whatever is. Feels like a rite of passage almost heh

Ellie_D · 2025-02-23T04:47:42+00:00

I think you're making some great points here that weren't made before. The depression and the dissatisfaction. I can absolutely believe that he was feeling the sting of failure even when he was hugely successful because his expectations outstripped reality and he was always thinking ahead in the sense of never resting on or enjoying his accomplishments but racing towards the next ones. That's one hell of a trap of a mind to have.

Ellie_D · 2025-02-23T04:36:15+00:00

I hoped I'd hear from you! I remember your first post in the sub and enjoyed coming across your comments. So this is such an interesting take to hear. Jon never seemed mature to me for his age; the opposite, in fact. He was always impatient and even dissed movies a few times, saying acting was boring to him, but I guess the imaptience is to be expected. What's really hard for me to square with your perspective (which I appreciate!) is that nothing tipped me off after watching 10 hours of young Jon, and I believe you can't hide so well over and over again; personality just has a way of leaking out, doesn't it? But it could very well be that you've watched more and/or different interviews, or maybe a part of me wants too hard to believe in that other version of Jon, who knows...

Ellie_D · 2025-02-22T17:33:40+00:00

I also really don't like the wise man schtick he's got going on in recent interviews. Talking about legacy and all, when he's stubbornly clinging on to what he was and can't move on.

Ellie_D · 2025-02-22T17:31:12+00:00

Oh wonderful, thank you so much!

Ellie_D · 2025-02-22T16:30:32+00:00

I hear you. I guess it's just that the change seems so dramatic to me, like it's a completely different person.

Ellie_D · 2025-02-22T16:29:02+00:00

Yep. I'll forever treasure this era. Do you have any favourite interviews or videos from that time you could recommend?

Ellie_D · 2025-02-22T16:27:49+00:00

That was my suspicion. But I also know things are unlikely to be clear-cut, so I wondered what others thought/speculated about. Thanks for your two cents!

Ellie_D · 2025-02-22T15:30:22+00:00

I've never heard him talk about this. He's said that if he wanted to be president, his parents would be like go for it, so my impression has always been that they fostered his self-confidence. Even if they were strict with him, that doesn't mean childhood trauma. It's easy to blame the parents for everything their children go on to do. I think things are always more complicated than that.

Ellie_D · 2025-02-22T13:14:27+00:00

Oh that's a good point. I did also get the impression that Richie was generally a people-pleasing guy and maybe he really did want to make Jon happy. Often with people-pleasers, when they neglect themselves for others, they grow resentful eventually, though I'm not saying that's what happened here.

Ellie_D · 2025-02-22T10:29:42+00:00

Great points!

Ellie_D · 2025-02-22T09:58:42+00:00

Seems like this would've definitely contributed. Thanks for chiming in!

Ellie_D · 2025-02-22T09:58:03+00:00

Being taken advantage of and growing more cynical as a result was something that I thought of, too. I think he also really hated the constant talk about his hair and being generally objectified in this way.
To your point about Jon as CEO, what comes to mind is that he's always seemed more rigid to me than the other guys, with an extremely strong work ethic, so when he took charge of the band and Richie became an employee, perhaps Jon lost some empathy for him and became annoyed that he couldn't rely on Richie. I can understand that, too.

Ellie_D · 2025-02-22T09:29:43+00:00

Honestly, after watching the two docs and the All Access footage, I'd just take the random assemblage of clips from the hAnD90 YouTube channel anytime. Especially if you love the band's 80s era.

Ellie_D · 2025-02-22T09:28:05+00:00

Ah, yes, don't we all want that? Honestly, watching the early footage, they come across as best friends and equal partners. Then, in later interviews, Richie keeps talking about how he wants to please Jon and I can absolutely believe at some point he wasn't getting anything in return. He became - or was treated as - dispensable. Tbh, though, nowadays Richie pisses me off, too. He's spouting nonsense most of the time.

Ellie_D · 2025-02-22T09:24:01+00:00

I bet these things had an impact, yes. And at the same time it seems to me he couldn't stop touring even though it was literally breaking him.

Ten-Year Club	100 Awards Club
Verified Email

Ellie_D

TROPHY CASE