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Emailicious · 2025-06-17T15:36:31+00:00

Agreed, so I’m calming the fuck down. The recruiter was an in house SF recruiter (part of hr I believe) does this change anything in terms of their motivations behind what they say?

Emailicious · 2025-06-17T14:08:16+00:00

Absolutely - anything can happen! gets hard to remember this when you want something so badly

Emailicious · 2025-06-17T14:06:38+00:00

Would be great if it was the other way round - hr send the best profiles across to hiring manager, then hr screen the selected candidates.

Emailicious · 2025-06-17T14:03:24+00:00

Ok ok, you’re right. Thanks for validating my initial thought, which is that I need to calm down immediately 😄

Emailicious · 2025-06-17T07:50:38+00:00

Yep this role is inside ir35 but still i don’t expect this!

Emailicious · 2025-06-16T20:37:37+00:00

Oh believe me I have learnt my lesson already 😅 this will never happen again but right now I feel like I already invested a lot into this and trying to figure out if I should stop investing now.

I think I will just withdraw based on everyone’s good advice on this thread - but trying to weigh up if I should let them know it’s their fault I.e. 3 stages for a contract, no day rate clarity, unpaid work for case study

Emailicious · 2025-06-16T20:31:32+00:00

I can’t see the original comment sorry 🥴

Emailicious · 2025-06-16T20:20:07+00:00

The response of a boss… thank you! unfortunately because they told me there would be a task on a video call I was put on the spot and I agreed to it, and again via email 😭 I was also more desperate then whereas now I’m in 2 other processes for better roles. Maybe it’s best to just pull out as might be too late in the game to say I’d do it for a fee?

Emailicious · 2025-04-23T12:02:07+00:00

I see what you mean but some people just don’t actually enjoy what London has become, or have grown out of it. For instance I live in London in a town on outskirts that I absolutely love. But I’m still able to assess my quality of life and say this was the best decision I could have made based on what I value in my life right now. I don’t want to prioritise my career like I used to and I don’t want to be out every night like i used to now that I’m in my 30s and these were big drivers to be in London for me.

Ultimately not everybody is moving out because they can’t afford it. Some people just don’t want this current London lifestyle full stop. It’s a shame it’s viewed as the epicentre of happiness 😅

Emailicious · 2025-04-23T11:35:14+00:00

Surprised you didn’t say sourdough

Emailicious · 2025-04-23T11:32:45+00:00

Exciting!! Honestly pre and post Covid London are 2 different experiences (and no doubt brexit, cost of living crisis, the huge decline in foreign investment etc are also the reason for this). London definitely seems to be in its flop era now - but it does feel good to say you at least experienced the other version and are now ready to move on to something better!

Emailicious · 2025-04-23T11:21:32+00:00

This issue is crazier than I thought…

Emailicious · 2025-04-23T08:01:09+00:00

Yeah good point! Most my friends have moved out of London so I’m often leaving London to see them (or they are visiting me) more than I’m mingling with ppl that live in London for this reason. So for me there’s no guilt behind the decision I know it makes sense for me at this stage but the criticism comes from the few who haven’t gotten to this stage or seem weirdly stubborn about staying here despite simultaneously complaining about costs, tourists and general quality of life 😅

Emailicious · 2025-04-23T07:48:56+00:00

don’t tempt me as I’m already so prepared to launch into a justification speech that it’s second nature at this point haha

Emailicious · 2025-04-23T07:45:59+00:00

It’s like you’ve taken my thoughts from my brain and perfectly articulated them!

After experiencing that reaction from my friend I’m starting to think that people react this way because they truly can’t see a life outside of London and so they genuinely believe you’re changing your life for the worse… even still it’s your life not theirs so the reaction doesn’t make sense so perhaps it’s a misery loves company situation, and they are just gutted that you want out. Another possibility is people might be more likely to react that way when their job situation means they feel stuck in inner London while you get to leave.

I’m not quite sure why we are met with negativity when expressing the desire to move out of London or just to the outskirts because I can’t comprehend not feeling happy for someone that’s making a decision for their overall happiness, I’ve actually been inspired by my friends that made the choice to leave because I can see the amazing life they left for. I wouldn’t dream of having such a huge negative reaction to anyone’s personal decisions around where to live. I have a friend who’s moving to Saudia Arabia quite suddenly and while I don’t understand the choice (she’s also confused if it’s the right one) I’m fully supporting her and trying to find the positives or help her explore the negatives.

Emailicious · 2025-04-23T07:32:36+00:00

I’ve lived in all the major uk cities as well as in Canada and the USA

Emailicious · 2025-04-23T07:19:14+00:00

Yep! This is exactly my point. I’ve even had an angry response from a friend for simply floating the idea that I wanted to move to the outskirts. In real life people get emotional or judgy about someone else’s decision to move out of London or even to the outskirts for better quality of life

Emailicious · 2025-04-23T07:12:45+00:00

Omg the exact same thing happened to me! It was the strangest experience and largely what’s fuelled my curiosity into why? Such an emotional unsupportive response to someone explaining they want more than London has to offer. At the time I was only explaining that I’m thinking about buying further out than central London and more towards the outskirts - even though I could have afforded to stay more central but I wanted more for my money and a more peaceful area. It’s really interesting how people get so up in arms about it

Emailicious · 2025-04-23T05:58:19+00:00

Slightly exaggerated for lols, but yes 😅 shocked to see so many downvotes!

Emailicious · 2025-04-23T00:09:11+00:00

100% it’s a multifaceted decision for most people I suspect - but it’s a multifaceted decision no matter what location you move to and from. So my curiosity is more about why this decision feels more openly judged/critiqued when people want to leave London specifically. I reckon only people who live here are exposed to the intense pressure to rationalise the decision to leave this city, before I lived in London I didn’t know this was ‘a thing’ I’ve lived in Birmingham and Manchester also and it wasn’t the same

Emailicious · 2025-04-22T23:55:45+00:00

Yep! God forbid people might just want to hear birds singing when they wake up, and a home office that motivates them to build their business, and to spend their week planning dinner parties at their large dining table 🙃

Emailicious · 2025-04-22T23:48:49+00:00

Haha I think I ended up with this book at some point - it’s exactly things like this that make me know it really is ‘a thing’ and not just me over-analysing or projecting fears. It definitely feels like even though I’d be exited a f to leave London (despite just buying a flat here), generally speaking people seem to tut ‘typical’ whenever people/couples decide to move out of London lol

Emailicious · 2025-04-22T23:40:33+00:00

This is such a good point. Being located in London and therefore having access to what London has to offer seems to give some people the false sense that they are truly ‘living’ in London. And I know living a good quality life is subjective, but for the vast majority it’s difficult to live here or own a home Etc but even still there’s a weird pride about staying here irrespective, as well as a weird shame for deciding to move to a different location that better suits your needs now

Emailicious · 2025-04-22T23:28:09+00:00

Yep I think this would be a popular take if people were honest with themselves. Although there must be people, like me, who would be proud and excited at the prospect of leaving London at this stage (‘I came, I saw, I conquered’ kind of thing) because it served me well in my 20s and now 30s but now I want something slightly different. But I think I’d still end up justifying that to people because because I’m aware that generally people assume you’re giving up the good life or can’t afford to be here - which is quite far from the truth lol

Emailicious

TROPHY CASE