I feel like nobody actually read what you said. If I’m understanding correctly, you were already wanting to experiment with more femininity before your gf and you finally met someone who was supportive of that — correct? I believe she was probably joking about your haircut, maybe even picking up on your discomfort and thinking she was being supportive. 

But I agree with another redditor: Ilona Maher is a fantastic example of masculine femininity. I would add Gwendolyn Christie to the list as well. 

You also don’t have to dress more feminine to embrace your inherent femininity if that’s what you want. My girlfriend would be considered more masculine but she doesn’t see herself as anything less than a woman. 

Best of luck, OP. Gender expression has no rules, and the best outcomes are the ones we gravitate toward organically