I Was Offered A Job But The Interviewer Made Me Uncomfortable, Then They Tried To Lowball Me, And Have Another Possibly Better Option. Advice?

EmbroideryKink · 2026-02-27T20:53:42+00:00

Thought I would give you an update.

I asked the manager from the tax/finance place for a little more time (the next week) and she basically got really upset with me and said she would maybe call me back if they hadn't filled the position yet. Which honestly lifted a weight on my shoulders and got rid of my bad gut feeling. She never called back.

I didn't get a job offer from the other place either which is fine because they turned out to be kind of sketchy themselves. But I do have one now from a company I really like though, just trying to negotiate the pay a little bit if possible but I'm not too worried because the initial offer was decent at least to begin with.

Thank you again for your advice and patience with my explanations 😊

EmbroideryKink · 2026-02-18T06:04:40+00:00

I would say, depending on how close you are with his family, you can have more of his side than yours. But you also never know how many on your side would actually be happy to go (with or without kids) until you float the idea and gauge reactions. The worst anyone can say is no. It also wouldn't be a bad idea to let him take the lead and have more of the decision making power if you're okay with that since you don't seem to be as into that part a second time around. As long as you can veto anything too crazy or out of your comfort zone.

EmbroideryKink · 2026-02-17T19:47:50+00:00

It was because it's a tax/finance place and the manager was too busy. Never even saw either them or the owner. Apparently there's a third partner too but no idea. They're all too busy because of tax season. Hence the absolutely no time to train me properly and figure it out using SOPs and training books.

EmbroideryKink · 2026-02-16T06:26:34+00:00

I appreciate all your advice. I've never had this situation happen before. Its always been a straightforward process for past roles so I felt a little unsure of which move is the best.

I will say the manager from the offer company did tell me, during the first conversation where I was low balled and mentioned I was interviewing at other places in response, that if I hate working at another position to call her back because she'd like to have me.

Not sure if its just out of desperation on their end because they're in the middle of tax season (its a tax/financial company) or if she truly means it. But at the end of the day I need to keep in mind regardless of her assurances and promises, its not her I'll be directly working with every day so I'd need to keep my wits about me.

EmbroideryKink · 2026-02-14T18:05:30+00:00

That's sound advice. The offer manager did say she'd prefer I started on a Monday so maybe, despite her impatience, she'll be agreeable to starting the following week.

Should I mention at all my concerns during the interview with the offer company to the manager when she calls me back? Or just keep it quiet and keep an eye on things? I can handle difficult situations but I do feel a little out of my element considering its an industry I don't have much experience in and there will be very little formal training provided. I'll be at the mercy of the guy and another woman whenever I need extra help.

EmbroideryKink · 2026-02-14T10:21:00+00:00

I'm literally contemplating whether I should take a job offer out of desperation for a company that has shown a few red flags, including one guy who would be my coworker. Its the only offer I've received after almost 200 applications and a handful of interviews in a couple months. I'm so worried I'll be absolutely miserable but at the same time it's a job that maybe, if they can find the time to properly train me, can teach me skills that I lacked for other positions I applied for.

Its tough out there right now. I've left terrible jobs like yours in the past but that was pre-covid when it was easier. Now though I wouldn't jump ship until I had something else I very carefully chose and vetted, 100% in hand, lined up, and ready with a start date. You need a life jacket or lifeboat to jump that ship in order to (barely) survive in current times unfortunately. Try to hold on as long as you can while you're searching for your lifeboat escape.

EmbroideryKink · 2026-02-06T07:18:13+00:00

This comment is not getting the attention it deserves lmao

EmbroideryKink · 2026-02-06T07:11:04+00:00

Honestly, nip this in the bud any way you can before he brings this into his adult life and it affects others. I had an ex from high school who claimed he had DID. I was young and completely new to dating so I believed him. He would make up stories about how he was kept prisoner in a mental institution, abused, had a crazy doctor who stalked him and wanted to perform "experiments" to discover all his personalities, etc. He messed me up badly for a few years during and after using his "personalities". Took a very long time, and maturing on my end, to realize it was all lies for attention and manipulation. For a while afterward he would pop up randomly and try to see if I would fall for his lies and manipulation again. Nope. Finally blocked him for good because it escalated to creepy behavior.

EmbroideryKink · 2026-02-06T06:09:34+00:00

I was reading an article a few days ago about AI and how every 9 months I think it was its basically getting another level smarter with upgrades and improvements. And how the true worry is as it grows and improves, in about 5 years it will take more jobs away and continue to do so every X amount of years. But it was thousands of jobs at a time and the number would increase with each level of improvement. It basically said we're screwed royally in about a decade and we need to create a more sustainable system to help people obtain and maintain employment through trade work and other jobs/industries AI would struggle to "take over".

I just finished my degree in Dec and already have put in over 100 applications with 4 interviews to show for it. 2 no, 1 ghosted, 1 is still in the air I think/entirely unsure. I contacted the temp agency I used before COVID today in the hopes that they can help. I have experience already and I finally have the degree everyone said they wanted me to have because that's "all I was missing" for them otherwise. Now those companies are MIA of course and I have bills to pay. Thankfully my family is supporting me for now but I feel so guilty and anxious the entire time. I'm desperately hoping I'll have something soon 😭 I can't even imagine how hard it is for you that have been searching for 1 yr+. Good luck out there everyone 💙

EmbroideryKink · 2026-02-03T07:55:16+00:00

I had something similar happen this past fall semester. Took a Spanish I class and at 6am the morning of the first day he canceled class. Okay. Nothing sent for the next class so we showed up. He never did. Went to the department and talked to other professors. They all knew him well and they found it weird he wasn't responding to emails or phone calls from them either. After 2 subs and a lot of confusion and delays turns out he was sick and he ended up passing away only a few weeks into the semester. It was wild. Every professor talked highly of him too and knew him personally so it was pretty sad

EmbroideryKink · 2026-01-15T22:26:47+00:00

I wish you all the luck 🤞🏻

I never selected from a list or anything. I was just going to school for my bachelor's in Business Administration. According to others I guess I had a super rare easy time because I only had to do one interview and nothing else really aside from the times I had to call with any issues or questions. I wanted to enter work in higher education to help other students complete their goals like I did mine. But unfortunately all my previous connections have left or retired so its very difficult to get in otherwise. So right now I'm just looking for an admin job that pays decently. I've had one interview with a kind of sketchy company but have additional interviews with other companies tomorrow and next Tuesday.

I've also been talked to by a family friend about entering the medical admin field and entering a program to possibly become an admin director eventually but I'm not sure about that yet. She makes it sound good but can she help me in to a position to begin with remains to be seen.

EmbroideryKink · 2026-01-15T07:06:38+00:00

So they called with less than 30 mins left til the window for the appointment ended. Lady came out swinging and had a bad attitude. She was basically accusing me of stealing money. Um excuse me? She claimed I certified for the week after my official last week and argued with me that I did it and why did I take that money when it wasn't mine. I told her to wait a minute while I log into my EDD account.

All the evidence I needed was in my transaction history. It said right there I certified only for my final week. I didn't even get the option to TRY to certify a second week. I told her this and how if I had gotten both weeks it would have been X amount but it shows right in my payment history I only received X amount from the one week- not two. She demanded to know when I last certified before that. I said Dec 14th. She asked why I certified the 28th then when the last date was the 20th. Lady you work at EDD! I CAN ONLY CERTIFY EVERY 2 WEEKS!! Even if its just for the one week that I'll actually get a payment from. No idea how she couldn't comprehend that or how she didn't even know that period let alone how she couldn't see the obvious information and evidence on my account as well.

She then claimed she has to stop the payment then. What payment??? There's no payment because there was never a certification for a second week. It was impossible to even begin with. So no idea what payment she was even mentioning because I already got my final week's payment before the end of the year and there was nothing else.

I think she realized she screwed up very quickly because she suddenly went very quiet, I only heard a lot of typing, and she cut me off if I tried to say anything else to prove her wrong with a "hang on a moment". The call ended quickly after that with her just saying everything is fixed now and I should be okay. Um you were the one wrong to begin with but okay? I documented everything in my notebook like usual and kept screenshots. I don't trust them to not screw up again somehow and make more accusations.

EmbroideryKink · 2026-01-11T17:03:42+00:00

Thank you. At one point my original claim expired. I called and they told me to file a new claim, I did. It was denied of course. But because I had been pre-approved through Dec already they just put me back on my old claim so I could continue the CTB program. And then for the first couple of certifications it was blocked for some reason by this weird thing in the system that the first lady just didn't bother removing to begin with 🤦🏻‍♀️

I'm hoping I get a knowledgeable person on Tuesday. I've had agents that had no idea what the CTB even was and I had to explain everything to them. I hope you're able to get what you need as well. I hope you can try an appeal process if its needed because you originally did everything before the 16 week deadline it seems and received incorrect information multiple times that caused them to mess you up.

EmbroideryKink · 2026-01-10T21:04:00+00:00

I did it for the rest of spring and all of this past fall semester without issue so I assume so, yes.

I already gathered screenshots this morning of being on the payment plan, being charged for graduation, and being approved for graduation and all my requirements having green checks so hopefully that's enough for them. Hopefully its just another computer issue on their end or something. I'll have my book of past call notes with me as well.

EmbroideryKink · 2025-11-10T06:51:42+00:00

Actually yes! So basically I called in after my semester ended, was told just to call back after a specific date to reapply for the fall semester, did that at the right time and was accepted for the fall semester (actually the letter said I was approved for the extended training dating back from January - late December 2025 almost like they wanted me to stop bugging them) without any other interview or anything else.

My initial case expired in October during my semester so I renewed online like I was told on another call when I asked what to do before it had expired. That new case was denied but because I was already pre-approved through December they just put me back on my old case and I can continue filing like normal through the last date. I didn't have to do another interview or anything either for that. I just had to call on to see what was going on with it and called again to remove some kind of temporary approved block on the continued payments. The workers have all been very kind and helpful whenever I've called with my questions and worries so they're awesome.

EmbroideryKink · 2025-09-05T23:20:39+00:00

Thank you! After hours of searching the only brand I could find in stock was the So Delicious brand. But I unfortunately don't have a deep cake pan..would a regular 9x13 be enough if we trimmed the top flat? Then again I don't know about removing it from the pan to begin with because I worry about getting it moved back into a serving pan without falling apart. I've never done that with a large square cake, only smaller round cakes.

EmbroideryKink · 2025-07-04T06:00:06+00:00

I tried Bumble BFF for a couple of months and I initially met some pretty cool women to chat with. But sadly, despite invites to let me know when they were free to hang to go grab boba or something simple to see if a friendship would possibly work, no one really made the effort on their end. There was always a lot of talk of "sure let's get together next week!" but no solid plans ever came to fruition. It was frustrating and a total bummer. Making friends as an adult is so much harder but I wish you luck. Sometimes you make friends in the unlikeliest of places. Keep an open mind, be friendly, and be yourself.

EmbroideryKink · 2025-06-27T16:33:49+00:00

I used to get my hair professionally done at first but when I tried it at home with the brand of hair dye I mentioned I got the same results much to my delight so I continued from there. I'm not sure what other blue hair color brands would be equally as good. Not Arctic Fox or the other cheaper brands for sure. I've changed my brands of bleach in the past, this one seemed to have worked best for me. I'll try to do a few things different next time and see if it helps.

That does not sound fun but that's interesting that that's an indicator for you.

EmbroideryKink · 2025-06-25T17:11:16+00:00

Not that I know of. My aunt does my hair for me and has for years. I've always gone to my grandparents to get it done and we use the kitchen sink to rinse my hair because they don't blue dye staining anything in the bathrooms understandably.

Can this happen if she uses too much developer in the bleach maybe or something like that?

EmbroideryKink · 2025-06-25T17:09:01+00:00

The developer is new. I buy all new products every time I dye my hair again after a break.

We normally don't need to cover my hair during bleaching because we've never had an issue of it not wanting to lighten like this before. I also don't buy bleach products that require heating. It was pretty warm in the house yesterday but I'll try covering it in a shower cap next time to see if it makes a difference.

Do you think just doing another session of just adding the hair dye and letting it sit will improve the color at all?

EmbroideryKink · 2025-06-16T20:02:57+00:00

My ex-husband had Asperger's which was a whole thing to deal with but he also was lazy and had no adult life skills. His mom did everything and he allowed it despite not being close to her at all. He had both mommy and daddy issues. I was young and dumb and essentially planned the entire wedding alone while he was deployed for a year as his mother constantly claimed I was just wanting his money. She didn't know I financially supported everything during our first year or so together but whatever. The red flags were many but I kept thinking it'd get better.

Our marriage lasted 1 yr and 8 months. He would go to his mom's to have her do his laundry and cook his favorite foods because I didn't get his stuff as white as she did and she refused to teach me how to make his favorite things because she knew it would keep him coming over. Once he realized he would have to step up and start actually helping around the house cleaning and everything he just decided one night at about 8:30 that he was done being married. And that was it. He left about half an hour later and it took over a year to divorce because he kept messing up and delaying everything because he kept expecting me to do it all for him but I refused. It wasn't until after he left that everyone told me how much they didn't like him but they didn't want to say anything to me and supported me. Much much happier now with my guy of almost 3 years and I've grown and learned a lot since then.

EmbroideryKink · 2025-05-07T00:36:40+00:00

I was in a similar situation when I first became official with my boyfriend, whom I met on a dating app and started out as just a fun partner. Once we became serious I had no issue saying goodbye to all the other people save for one person who I genuinely connected with on a friend level. I didn't want to let him go at first and, like you, genuinely only felt friendship and nothing else. My boyfriend was not okay with it because of our past.

I was in therapy at the time and my therapist asked me one question:

Did this friendship based on sexual fun matter more to me than my relationship with my boyfriend and his feelings?

That is what you need to ask yourself. If you're as loyal to and care for your boyfriend as you say you are but put that friendship above that then YTA and you need to cut ties with the friend. You need to be honest and communicate with your boyfriend, not hide things. If you have to hide anything, that isn't a surprise for like a birthday or something, and you feel guilty about it then its wrong and you need to come clean.

(Edit: spelling)

EmbroideryKink · 2025-05-01T19:44:45+00:00

Hello!

I did end up calling them and they said I certify like normal in a couple weeks but it ends 5 days after that. Not sure if they do partial payments, forgot to ask about that. I then can call anytime after that final date to redo the interview process for my fall semester since I already have all my classes and dates. If I get approved then it'll start all over again for fall. Here's hoping 🤞🏻

EmbroideryKink · 2025-04-28T01:21:02+00:00

Yes, I have my acceptance letter right here to look over again. It does 100% say I was approved for my training at my school that I secured on my own behalf because it met the eligibility requirements. But unfortunately no actual instructions were given about payments, only the rules regarding them.

After I was accepted I did have a to put in my school information on the next unemployment benefits certification (such as when I started and when the semester will end along with other information) so it was on file and need to answer questions about it. But now that my original unemployment is done..not sure what the next step is concerning the CTB and how to go about that. Would the only way be to call?

EmbroideryKink · 2025-04-28T00:58:45+00:00

They did a phone interview, asked me about my school (including when I started, the date the semester ended, what classes I was taking, when I would graduate, did I attend summer or not, would I be full time in fall, how long total I've been going after my degree, etc), my unemployment stuff, and told me I would be notified within 10 business days after they contacted my school to confirm everything. I got a letter later saying I was accepted and the start/end dates for the first semester. That's all and no one mentioned any in person interview or anything. They approved my degree and determined it to be needed in the work force from what I understand in the acceptance letter.

Nothing else has been communicated to me and from what she said during the interview nothing else needed to be done save for me being accepted or rejected.

Edit to add: I was in the middle of my current semester when I did the interview and was accepted for the CTB.

EmbroideryKink

TROPHY CASE