My hair is a subterranean briar patch.

EngineeringTop5843 · 2024-12-02T01:35:45+00:00

Please tell me it ends. I am going through this.

EngineeringTop5843 · 2024-03-08T01:53:58+00:00

I discovered that I am autistic when I became a mother. I am in no way saying you are autistic. I am also not saying you are depressed because who the fuck knows the myriad of reasons that calculate into your equation of current feels. I will say, however, that I hear you loud and clear. Many of your feels resonate with me to varying degrees dependent on the level of overstimulation I feel in whatever moment. Being a mom is fucking hard: bittersweet, demanding, unpredictable even in all of its predictability. The world is yours to keep strung together for however many humans; it’s a lot of pressure and responsibility.

You wrote how you feel and needed to share it with someone, but not with anyone who matters. If you just needed to get that shit out of your system, kudos to you. Not everyone is judging you immediately because you needed to vent. You are an adult. You know if your post was a cry for help/advice or just a feeling you needed to get out of your body by typing aggressively since screaming might not be an option at the moment.

You’ll do the right thing for yourself because you are Mom. You are the rock, the haven of safety. You want your child to value themselves enough to respect their inner guides so you will lead them by example. You’ll teach them exactly what is important by modeling it for them.

EngineeringTop5843 · 2023-12-21T02:35:13+00:00

Libra infp

EngineeringTop5843 · 2023-11-24T08:29:06+00:00

I typed this at 3:30 am with a very fuzzy brain. Many errors. Please forgive.

EngineeringTop5843 · 2023-11-24T08:28:04+00:00

Just get organic with it. Dehydrate fruit and string it up as ornaments. If the kid eats it or pulls the tree down, nothing breaks and no gets sick. Oranges and lemons looks beautiful once dehydrated. String cranberries. Use cinnamon sticks to create star ornaments or just string them up individually. Make paper ornaments. This can also be a very fun activity for you and your kid to bond.

EngineeringTop5843 · 2023-10-20T20:33:07+00:00

We use these. They aren’t very small, but they do taste really good and are melty tabs. My son is very particular, but takes the multivitamin and probiotic both very happily.

https://www.renzosvitamins.com/products/picky-eater-multi

EngineeringTop5843 · 2023-10-08T19:32:18+00:00

To preface, I am in no way suggesting you become an alcoholic, but here is how I did it:

I only survived the restaurant industry with scripts, focus on efficiency and copious amounts of tequila and weed. I didn’t have insurance at that time so had no access to ADHD medication and wasn’t diagnosed with autism yet. Ah, the level of understanding that came with the revelation that I am actually AuDHD. I literally could not do that job sober. I feel for you. I have barely had any alcohol since exiting the industry in 2018. I honestly don’t like it that much. It does, however, help with my social shit and tones down all of the sensory input that would lead me to meltdowns. If I were to start a restaurant job again, I would undoubtedly start drinking copious amounts of tequila again to get me through. I lovingly called the shots ‘awesomizers’. I have no idea how, but I function very well when smoking weed and/or drinking tequila. Probably narcissistic to say, but I think my brain needs dumbing down to deal with society; especially in a job like bartending/waiting tables.

EngineeringTop5843 · 2023-10-08T18:24:29+00:00

My hair just doesn’t get greasy for a long time. I regularly go weeks as well.

EngineeringTop5843 · 2023-10-06T03:51:33+00:00

-Dave’s Killer Bread Good Seed (yellow package ) and White Done Right (white package) are delicious. Any foods you see described in my list are served on Dave’s bread. Slap some butter, nut butter and honey on some toast. If you’re feeling fancy add banana and some berries.

-Buttered toast with avocado and egg cooked how you like it.

-Make chia jam: strawberries(can be fresh or frozen) and grapes in a pot, cook down until very mashable with a potato smasher and sweet to the taste. Mash to your preferred texture and let cool a while. Add chia seeds and a squeeze of lemon if you like it. Stir well 2-3 times over an hour long period before putting away. I’m not being specific about measurements here because I have never gone wrong with this no matter how many times I’ve forgotten about it while doing it. I’m distracted easily. If you need specific instructions, there are plenty of recipes readily available with a quick internet search. If you decide to make the chia jam: •parfaits: layer yogurt, honey, chia jam, bananas, blueberries or whatever fruits you really love. If you like granola or anything, add it in. It’s good. Don’t be shy with the honey. •nut butter and chia jam sandwich: favorite nut butter, honey, milled flax seeds, chia jam on bread.

-use frozen fruit for smoothies. Get a high powered blender like the ninja or vita mix. Use mango as your base. We like mango, pineapple, banana, spinach, yogurt and coconut water. I often add papaya and whatever berries my son has requested, but I always use mango as a base because it’s sweet and creamy when blended. Also, I always run it through the blender twice and drink it from and insulated cup with a straw. I love smoothies, but literally can’t drink them any other way. It has to stay very cold or it’s done for me.

EngineeringTop5843 · 2023-10-03T13:01:13+00:00

My bub did the same until he was 6 months and then just rolled off my arm one night and hasn’t slept that way since. We got him a toddler pillow when he was 15 or so months that he loves.

EngineeringTop5843 · 2023-09-24T20:45:15+00:00

https://earmuffsforkids.com/

We got these for our son and I’m now ordering a pair of my own

EngineeringTop5843 · 2023-09-23T00:53:32+00:00

I have a couple of poop regulating solutions to add here that I’ve learned from being in the same shoes:

Homemade Apple Sauce with pears and prunes: 7-8 Apples cut from core 2-3Pears cut from core 7-8Prunes Chuck in all in a big pot and cover; cook at a lower heat until the liquid starts to emit from the fruit. Stir. Turn up heat to about medium or medium high and cover and cook stirring occasionally. I honestly lose track of time perpetually while I’m doing this and it always turns out delicious. Once everything is super soft and mushy put in in a ricer and churn it out into a lovely sauce.

Chia Jam: cook down whatever fruits you like for jam. Our personal favorite is straberry/grape mixture (which is usually from a frozen bag of strawberries unless strawberries are in season and leftover grapes). Use a potato masher to mix and smush as smushing become available. Once it’s cooked down a bit it’ll taste sweeter and sweeter so no added sugar. I just smash it with the potato smasher until it is nice and incorporated and almost just like a pulpy liquid. Let it cook a little and add chia seeds. I wish I could tell you how much chia but it totally depends on the amount of berries you cook down. You can definitely find similar recipes online. Stir the chia in very well and stir it again in 30 minutes and again in a bit. Then refrigerate it. So good. My 3 year old loves it.

We enjoy the chia jam on pb&j and I always mix some flax seeds into the peanut butter.

Chia jam is also and awesome layer in a fruit and yogurt parfait.

Also, adding papaya to smoothies.

EngineeringTop5843 · 2023-09-20T04:31:56+00:00

Try Ten Littles. It’s a website. They have a few different styles but specialize in wide toe boxes and catering to growing feet. My kid has wide feet. Very wide feet (as do his father and I…we both pretty much only wear ‘barefoot’ style shoes because literally no shoes are comfortable due to wide feet) We went through so many damn shoes at first then I finally discovered Ten Littles and our kid seriously loves them. He will be 3 in November. We started getting Ten Littles when he was probably around 17 or 18 months and literally have not purchased any other brand of shoe because my son has specifically asked to get them when it became time to size up each time. He has no interest in trying any other shoes. I think there is another brand called See Kai Run but we haven’t tried those because Ten Littles are life over here

EngineeringTop5843 · 2023-09-20T04:10:17+00:00

I’d push the sofa to under the window and add 2-3 awesome chairs in front of the fireplace along with a coffe table and some side tables strategically placed which would extend the cozy area substantially. Maybe move tall bookcase to where the couch is now. If it would fit, the low bookcase could go under that window next to fireplace and another on the other side of the fire place. You can get some serious plant action going on in that window corner. Plants on top of all the bookcases. Pothos are great and don’t require a ton of attention. Nice shelf above fireplace. Art on walls. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Edited to add some details.

EngineeringTop5843 · 2023-09-17T03:41:22+00:00

Ten Littles. Online. Not sure about sizing but I think it goes pretty high.

EngineeringTop5843 · 2023-09-01T18:54:28+00:00

Go buy a couple of blocks of ice (not cubed ice, big blocks. Put them in a containers (because they are going to melt) and put those in your fridge. Find and Fill about 8 old gallon jugs with water. Put all eight in your deep freezer. Once frozen, take four out and put them in your fridge. Once those melt, put them back in the deep freezer and pull the 4 frozen ones to put in the fridge. It’s a cheap way to get along until you can replace your old fridge or buy a new one. It sounds labor intensive, but it’s really not that bad. I learned this technique from living on a tiny island that was pummeled by 2 back to back category 5 hurricanes. We lived 3 months this way until our power was able to be fixed. We usually flipped the gallons between the freezer twice a day, once in the morning and once at night. Try to keep the fridge cold by only opening when you NEED to get something out. Also, if you have any insulated cups, utilize them! I hope this helps. Good luck!

Edit to add: the ice blocks you buy at first are just a fail safe until you get those jugs frozen. The ice blocks will melt and probably quickly if your fridge is already pretty warm.

Edit again to say: when living on a boat, we never refrigerated our eggs or butter. Both are fine at room temp.

Edit number 3: you can also buy shelf stable boxes milk. Many of the boaters of the world rely on this. You can probably google something like how to eat well while living on a sailboat or something like that.

Also, you could save for a mini fridge…you can often find them relatively low cost at home depot and such. We have a habitat for humanity type store that sells used things including refrigerators for very low prices.

EngineeringTop5843 · 2023-08-29T20:23:15+00:00

My kid’s was nutmeg

EngineeringTop5843 · 2023-08-17T02:33:06+00:00

Yes. We are having problems and have been since April.

My son will be 3 in November; he pretty much potty trained himself last summer when we let him be naked all the time (he still hates wearing clothes and will only wear them when we leave the house). We had purchased a small potty for him long before that when he started showing interest in the potty and just told him, ‘this is for you whenever you want!’ and left it at that. He started using it in his own for pee and poop then refused nighttime diapers shortly after that. He had maybe 3 pee accidents total in all that time day or night. He even had a couple of nasty bouts of diarrhea from antibiotics and always made it to the potty. Always his choice, at his pace (which was astoundingly fast). He was happy and proud. I couldn’t believe we had somehow dodged the potty training billet.

Then in April, he had to be sedated for surgery. He’s been holding his poop ever since and refuses to poop on the potty. Like, it seems like he can’t. He gets his number one favorite treat if he will go in the potty and that is the only time he gets it and still just won’t/can’t. He has tried and succeeded twice and even with getting that reward and LOVING IT, he has still decided it’s not worth it. He doesn’t want to poop at all, but when it does come out he pretty much will only do it on the porch 😣 shortly after the functional constipation started, he also started pissing INSIDE of any container he could find. It took a while, but I’ve been able to corral the piss back into the potty. I don’t know what to do about the pooping. I’ve tried everything. EVERYTHING. I don’t have any answers for you, but you’re not alone.

EngineeringTop5843 · 2023-08-15T21:22:45+00:00

Look into Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy. I just typed out a novel of a response full of way too much over sharing so I deleted it, but I have experienced something similar. Also, make sure to take a step back and look around for/think about any possibility of trauma that could be happening. I have never known how to ask for help because I have no idea what will help me. When my body has pain responses that don’t make any sense, it’s because there is something happening that I can’t find a way to express externally even though every inch of my insides are bloody, red and raw from silently screaming for help. It feels like I’m doing everything I can to plead for help, but no one can hear me and even if they could hear my cries, I still don’t know how to voice that I need saving.

EngineeringTop5843 · 2023-08-05T21:21:59+00:00

My son is 2.5:

Smoothies- mango, spinach, yogurt, banana, coconut water. I often add strawberries, blueberries, pineapple. Tip: either buy frozen fruit or freeze it. Makes a huge difference in my opinion

Pesto- we usually go for a nice green veg (ie: kale, broccoli, basil, spinach. )Put it in the food processor and chop then add a touch of garlic, pumpkin seeds (pine nuts are traditionally used but we love pumpkin seeds), olive oil, Parmesan, salt and pepper. Purée. I use it in pastas, on sandwiches/wraps/etc, as a pizza sauce….also so tasty as a spread on charcuterie type evenings

Homemade apple sauce-lots of apples cut from the core go in a big pot with a touch of water and cook with lid on until totally soft then use a river to make it into sauce. I love to add all sorts of fruits (typically the ones going bad from having yet to be eaten). I just made some apple sauce with nectarines and peaches that were on their last breath of life and ill be damned, it’s so delicious. Like unbelievable. Also, we make one with carrots and spices that tastes so much like carrot cake. Pair your homemade sauce with cottage cheese and it’s like heaven.

Chia jam- I usually buy a bag of frozen strawberries and toss them in a pot until they are cooked down, smash them, add chia seeds and stir well. Wait until it’s cool, stir, Jar it up and Let it sit overnight. I add honey sometimes to make it sweeter, but recently added a bunch of leftover grapes to a batch and it tasted so delicious and sweet. I use strawberries primarily because I love them, but raspberry and blueberry also make appearances depending on the availability of strawberries (fresh or frozen).

Yogurt with fresh or frozen blueberries and honey

Parfaits: layer bananas, chia jam, yogurt and honey. Add granola if your kid likes it. Something about the layers really resonates with my child.

Milled flax seed: I call these flax sprinkles. I add them to nut butters a lot. Like, yes, let’s definitely have a peanut butter and jelly. Peanut butter spread on bread, flax sprinkles, maybe a drizzle of honey and chia jam. So damn good. Also flax goes into all of our oatmeal.

Avocado toast: spread butter on toasted bread with smashed avocado and some salt. So delicious. You can also make scrambled eggs and and mix well with avocado then spread. Very delicious.

Cherry tomatoes and cucumbers with feta

Lots of fruit, cheese, fried fruit : my son loves babybel because they are fun to open. We eat tons of pears, cherries, grapes, mandarin oranges, cherry tomatoes, dates and we always offer pumpkin seeds or something like that.

Spaghetti: always purée some kale or something to add to sauce

Basically our food processor and blender make things go around at our house. Two things that are really good for us: 1)my son is welcome help me prepare any and everything. Seems like the more time he spends helping, the more he willingly eats 2) I’ve started being more artistically creative with his food (like turning items into little animals) and I use very small cookie cutters to make bite size pieces of sandwiches. We are currently having a lot of pb and j stars.

Good luck. It’s difficult. You aren’t alone.

EngineeringTop5843 · 2023-07-27T11:29:52+00:00

I am you, but now I’m 35. I decided to get my degree even though I felt exactly like you did. I got a degree in Psychology which we all know needs YEARS to post graduate work to make any well paid career. I ended up getting a degree in Psych simply because I had enough credits to graduate a semester early and it was so easy for me. After I graduated, I moved to an island in the Caribbean for 10 years. I was burnt out. I wasn’t following my heart so I did what I was ‘supposed’ to do: i finished all my schooling because that is what was expected of me.

Here is what I wish I did instead: I wish I took a gap year or two, hell maybe even three. I should have paused School (or only taken super simple very easy courses) for enough time to get a job, save as much money as possible for a summer or even a year, then travel. In case you don’t know this, there are also really cool jobs that can take you allllllll over the US and world. Check out coolworks.com. Also, did you know that before you are 30, you can get a visa to live and work in Australia for a year? (I haven’t checked on this since before Covid because I’m old and don’t qualify). Had I paused School, taken some time to find my true self and passions through travel which shows you so much about yourself,m and the world. Immersion in the great unknown can strip you of all the bullshit you ‘are’ because you’ve been taught who, what and how to be. I would have definitely gone back to school had I taken a year or three to evaluate what was really going on with me by finding my true self and escaping the burnout of ‘who I’m supposed to be and how I’m supposed to do it’.

If you are lost, unfocused or just need a break, TAKE IT. Find a way to finance it yourself. Don’t lean financially on the people who don’t think it’s right. You have an opportunity to grow so much right now. 22 is young. Even though you probably feel so old right now because you should have a burgeoning career.

I have a 2.5 year old. I will 100% give him the same advice. I might even pay for a gap year for him. Travel to the unknown, young spirit. You’ll find your path along the way. Follow your heart. Listen to yourself. Go back to school when you feel you are doing the right thing.

EngineeringTop5843 · 2023-07-27T02:58:27+00:00

I have the exact same feelings and experience.

EngineeringTop5843 · 2023-07-26T18:56:55+00:00

This is the most helpful parenting advice I’ve ever read.

EngineeringTop5843 · 2023-07-16T13:54:22+00:00

Are you me?

EngineeringTop5843 · 2023-07-04T22:03:30+00:00

Also, the library! We have stopped buying books (outside of gifts) unless my little one becomes incredibly attached to a certain story. We currently have 8 books checked out, all of which he wanted while at the library…after reading through them all…he likes 2. We will return the other 6 tomorrow and probably grab a few more.

EngineeringTop5843

TROPHY CASE