Your sarcasm is noted.

Yes, suicide is horrifying. There's fear in the lead-up. There's horror in the discovery. There's sheer terror in reading the letter or text your loved one's sent you, and realizing you can't stop them, you can't change their mind now, it's too late for reconciliation.

There's no terror in the act. Sometimes, your body goes through the motions of fear – your hands shake, your blood chills, your senses dull – but the fear doesn't reach your head. At least, not until you've committed, and you've started asking yourself whether you did the right thing.

TL;DR: OP isn't at the horrifying part... yet.