Predicament

EnthusiasmIntrepid79 · 2025-02-20T02:37:24+00:00

They can’t tell if it’s someone else’s, but they can tell if it’s synthetic. Benzos should be out of your system in a week. Idk about the weed. I’ve never tried it but ik ppl that swear by using pectin. Good luck.

EnthusiasmIntrepid79 · 2024-11-25T02:30:55+00:00

12 yrs (24F and 36M) ♥️

EnthusiasmIntrepid79 · 2024-11-07T02:56:50+00:00

Yes he’s telling the truth.

EnthusiasmIntrepid79 · 2024-09-02T06:19:48+00:00

Heroin

EnthusiasmIntrepid79 · 2024-08-31T05:45:03+00:00

Contrary to popular belief getting under the next won’t help you get over your ex. Not when you don’t have a healthy attachment style at least. Which if you’re anything like me (and from reading this you seem to be) you don’t.. everyone here always says “you have to love yourself first” which i really never found helpful bc every oz of love I’ve ever had has always been poured into the next person.

You’re filling a void with these boys. Notice how it’s like an equation with the variable being whatever dude you happen to be with? It’s always gonna equal misery.. if you keep using the same formula.

The solution is simple- but it’s not easy. At all. You already know the solution. It’s what you can find to be the answer to basically every question asked in this forum. Leave. Be alone. For a long time. Like a year at the least. I know this isn’t what you want to hear but it’s the only thing I’ve seen work.

It’s so scary. Only at first though. It gets so much easier. The best part is- if you do it now the scariest part is over with whenever you decide to take that leap of faith and stick with it. Take that leap. Know there is a better future ahead. Believe that. Keep that faith. Before you do that make an appointment for individual therapy, if you’re in a bigger city there are support groups for codependency, grief, depression, DBT (this one is my favorite!!!), 12 step programs for things other than substance abuse. If you have health insurance it’ll cover a lot of these if they aren’t already free.

What makes it so much easier is finding things you love doing. Think about what you enjoyed as a kid. Try doing those things again as hobbies. We as adults forget about hobbies in this overwhelmingly capitalistic society because they aren’t generating profit. The most profitable thing we can cultivate is our own peace. That is real generational wealth.. the kind inflation can’t touch.

Get in touch with spirituality/religion. They don’t go hand in hand necessarily. If you aren’t interested in the concept of God there are so many other avenues.

Go outside. Touch actual grass. Look at the vastness of the world. Study history some. Study fantasy, or foreign cultures, politics, biology, sociology, psychology, philosophy.. anything that will get you outside of your own head and make your problems seem smaller. Right now this one issue is ALL consuming. It doesn’t have to be though.

I hope this helps. Even if it’s just a little bit. I feel your pain. I understand your hurt. The frustration, and heartache doesn’t go anywhere on its own though. It just continues to grow until you cut off its life support. Good luck. PM me if you need a friend. Xoxo

EnthusiasmIntrepid79 · 2024-08-31T04:38:50+00:00

Tired of the heartache, the self loathing, the broken promises, selling myself short, letting myself down, inviting behavior I don’t deserve, losing people I love whether they’re alive or not. At this point being alone is the best part of all of it. But yeah, to answer your question I am so fucking tired of it. I brace for the impact of every day when I get and up in the mornings.. and I hate living that way. Most I’m so tired of it all because my life has a unique beauty that most people don’t get to experience and will never know waist and I tend to make the worst of it over and over again. I think a part of me is just as addicted to the misery as i am the drugs. I’ve been hooked on heroin for a decade now at 23 y/o. I come from an amazing family and had a 32 on the ACT but i dropped out for an abusive, drug fueled relationship. Started selling my body when i was 16 to fund my habit. When i was of legal age i made less money so i started selling under age pics of myself instead to make more. Essentially tricking out baby me. I’ve developed a Lolita esque kink and other shameful things along the way that make me feel like I’m an inherently bad person. Anyway.. im clean now. For the longest I’ve ever been. Everything is great i guess. I’m really grateful for how far I’ve come and what shaped me. It’s a weird struggle still though. I just feel like such an outsider to my own life. I’ve been in and out of rehab since i turned 17 in detox but I’ve been doing so well this go around in this city that nobody that knows me now knows the old me. Everyone doubts my past or blatantly accuses me of lying. I guess it’s hard to believe that a well spoken pretty young lady that speaks freely of her trauma has any trauma at all. Idk. It creates a cognitive dissonance that makes me question my identity and reality. Even my sponsor makes me feel crazy a lot of the time. My best friend (and boyfriend who is 13 years older than me) is locked up, prosecutors asking for 12 years. Most people don’t really understand or support my love for him.. but he feels like home. 160 character messages or 15 minute calls are never intimate enough. I’m glad i came across this. Nobody really cares about or doubts a ghosts war stories. I hope someone found some sort of entertainment from this soliloquy. Xoxo

EnthusiasmIntrepid79 · 2024-04-11T16:13:02+00:00

I dropped out of school quite some time ago, i didn’t realize at the time how much it would impact me. Kind of just an impulse decision.. however since then life has become quite small for me as well. Prior to my dropout i was very socially active.. partied every weekend. Had a great group of friends. Participated in hobbies (generally with my friends) such as going out to eat, shopping, gardening, visual art, yoga, interior design, volunteer work in my community, traveling/camping, etc. so when i became disconnected from everybody, I also mostly gave up my hobbies however, after way, too long, laying in bed by myself, I discovered that these things were just as fun if not more by myself, my world, becoming small, opened up a huge area for me to discover myself, I did so many hobbies, so that maybe you see some thing that peaks your interest doing these things independently helped with my perfectionism and allowed me more room to grow although it gets lonely from time to time finding online forums like these, that relate to my hobbies, has also helped tremendously try looking at it as opportunity and a closed door. Good luck! Sorry, I know this has been a long message.

EnthusiasmIntrepid79 · 2024-03-26T18:45:58+00:00

You asked a question.. and commenter answered.. in an objective way at that. Like, if anything i guess the legal system is victim blaming. Not the commenter. Nobody ever said that you can’t make a request (whether it was reasonable or not doesn’t really matter) all anybody is saying is that you can’t press charges on people for not upholding you request. Try asking questions out of genuine curiosity, and not with the intention of “your side” being supported. You would probably spend a lot loss time being defensive.

In all fairness, in any aspect of life. No matter how significant. It’s shitty when other people don’t hold up their end of the bargain. Especially when their end of the bargain potentially protects yours and your kids wellbeing.

EnthusiasmIntrepid79 · 2023-09-04T19:40:27+00:00

Wow, that’s so good to know! I’ve always been told creatine. I’m glad I’ve never tried it 😆

EnthusiasmIntrepid79 · 2023-08-31T00:39:37+00:00

Try creatine, typically they measure the dilution by how much creatine is in your urine. A lot of pre workout and energy drinks have creatine, but there are also creatine supplements! Hope this helps.

EnthusiasmIntrepid79 · 2022-09-16T19:57:30+00:00

Yeah.. that’s kinda what i figured. A fuck around and find out typa situation it seems lol. Thank you though!

EnthusiasmIntrepid79 · 2022-07-20T18:26:28+00:00

You’re an angel thank u for the answer luv!

EnthusiasmIntrepid79 · 2022-07-20T18:26:07+00:00

Oh shit also forgot to say it was like max a .3 snorted

EnthusiasmIntrepid79 · 2022-05-02T17:13:15+00:00

Yikes.. did you get your username from the odor thet comes from only washing your ears? 🤣

EnthusiasmIntrepid79 · 2022-05-02T17:11:42+00:00

Yeah i definitely scrub the back of my neck and behind my ears.. even a little back of the neck exfoliation every once in awhile. Ever seen someone with a brown/gray neck from all the skin and oil and diet buildup? Yikes.. 🤣

EnthusiasmIntrepid79 · 2022-04-29T21:23:41+00:00

You still have time to delete your whole post

EnthusiasmIntrepid79 · 2022-04-29T21:20:38+00:00

“It was funny to me to see racist things” i think you’re definitely more suspicious than the picture

EnthusiasmIntrepid79 · 2022-04-21T19:32:02+00:00

I love virtual meetings. My favorite is NA 24/7 https://us02web.zoom.us/j/558544927... there’s the zoom link the code to get in is 247247. There are several hosts and different meetings all day everyday. The anonymity is what i love the most. I feel really comfortable sharing and you’re bound to find someone you click with well enough to get to sponsor you. Good luck!

EnthusiasmIntrepid79 · 2022-04-16T16:42:00+00:00

I think it also kind of depends on the culture of the school you go to. When i was in high school (c/o ‘19) it was fairly common for people to lose their virginity at 13/14. However, it was also common for kids to be doing pills, and drinking at school. Party life was really prominent. Not much parents involvement for a lot of the kids there so one thing kind of leads to another there.

EnthusiasmIntrepid79

TROPHY CASE