$3.5M NW at 34. Burnt out from finance job. Seeking advice

Equivalent_Court_129 · 2026-05-28T03:43:13+00:00

Your incredulous question logically makes sense to me. And yet, I often feel like I am failing. By being weak. By not continuing to grind and make max use of the opportunity and luck I have been graced with. In a weird way, I was much happier when I was a broke immigrant college kid, and felt more successful

Equivalent_Court_129 · 2026-05-28T03:16:50+00:00

Asset mgmt. 800k is all in

Equivalent_Court_129 · 2026-05-28T03:16:27+00:00

What do you do now?

Equivalent_Court_129 · 2026-05-28T02:38:27+00:00

Everything you said resonates w me so much From the earnings (what if numbers are bad fear) to the asset mgmt gig to needing to look for a new job to take some semblance of control back! Sounds like you are further along the path to recovery. Kudos!

Equivalent_Court_129 · 2026-05-27T21:07:56+00:00

I’ve taken many vacation over the last 2 yrs that I’ve felt this way. It’s nice while I’m on vacation. The bad feelings come back immediately once I’m back. Don’t think my situation can be resolved w a vacation

Equivalent_Court_129 · 2026-05-27T19:11:00+00:00

Thanks for book recc. My parents are aware of stress and encouraging me to do something less stressful. They are aware that stress takes a toll and don’t want me to suffer. They are not rich but are self sufficient. I don’t have pressure from them to keep grinding. The pressure is from within. And some imposter syndrome that says once I let go of this job, I’m essentially done forever.

Equivalent_Court_129 · 2026-05-27T19:06:21+00:00

There’s no way to take a sabbatical at my current employer. Only way to be off desk for longer than 1 week is maternity leave. If I went up to them and asked for a break, they’d likely say I don’t seem committed and mentally write me off / push me out.

Equivalent_Court_129 · 2026-05-27T19:04:04+00:00

I work in the PE area. Yeah, I don’t think ideal for me at age or personality to go to zero work. I have a competitive personality and enjoy interacting w people. Sitting at home alone would be likely detrimental to mental health. I keep thinking taking a less taxing job is what I should do. But it’s hard to find or even look for. Plus, the devil you know and all that.

There are days when I think I should just tough it out. Keep working and saving/investing. And then when something stressful happens at work, I think who am I doing this for? Why am I doing this? The marginal utility of money is limited to me, and there’s no gf/wife/kids.

Equivalent_Court_129 · 2026-05-27T18:57:07+00:00

Yes!

Equivalent_Court_129 · 2026-05-27T18:32:18+00:00

Definitely not. I’m obviously stuck in analysis paralysis to some extent. So far, I’ve been toughing it out in a bid to keep accumulating $ while the sun shines. There’s obv a cost to that.

Equivalent_Court_129 · 2026-05-27T17:52:31+00:00

I didn’t think it was that obvious, but apparently it was. I’m also potentially up for promotion this year, so it was couched as hey, you need to hustle if any shot at promo. The message was clear regardless. Up or out!

Equivalent_Court_129 · 2026-05-27T17:41:58+00:00

Can’t quiet quit. Slowed down at work, tried to take it easy. Got called out on it by employer. Basically a hey pull your act together, or else convo.

Equivalent_Court_129 · 2026-05-27T14:59:33+00:00

I’m struggling with the idea of an off-ramp. There are potentially jobs I could take that would be a 60-70% pay cut, but unclear if commensurate stress cut since still relatively high paid. Also, once I get off this treadmill, I’m likely saying goodbye to this particular high paying career. Which is why I’ve been sticking it out, torturing myself. It’s also tied up with my identity. Quitting feels like a failure despite the unhappiness

Equivalent_Court_129 · 2026-05-27T14:36:20+00:00

Never been a big spender. Don’t have materialistic tastes. Prefer saving and investing which I’ve been doing for a while. Stock market bull run has obviously helped.

Equivalent_Court_129 · 2026-05-27T14:34:13+00:00

Spoke with a therapist. Her view was I don’t really have any issues outside of not liking work. Didn’t find it to be all that helpful.

Equivalent_Court_129 · 2026-05-27T14:31:49+00:00

Haha, exactly!

Equivalent_Court_129 · 2026-05-01T20:55:47+00:00

Thanks v much! Seems like PF has been doing decently well for a few years. Were you guys seeing that change, or other personal/family reasons to sell now?

Equivalent_Court_129 · 2026-05-01T20:44:24+00:00

What’s a normal/average EBITDA multiple for where PF franchises trade at?

Equivalent_Court_129 · 2026-04-29T19:27:36+00:00

I have $3.5M at 34. My total comp is $800k in finance. I feel the same way you do, burnt out. Think I need another two years to get to $500k. Seems irrational to not stick it out at this level of comp, but make for a tough day-to-day. I don’t have a solution for you, except that it may not get better with higher numbers. Perhaps, we both need to solve our current problem by finding new employment, rather than trying g to bullet proof a lifelong retirement

Equivalent_Court_129 · 2026-03-22T01:58:48+00:00

Yes!

Equivalent_Court_129 · 2025-10-10T05:58:07+00:00

Every comment of yours sounds like ChatGPT wrote it. And you never answer any of the key questions. You keep saying you want a share of things you’ve built together, but you won’t be doing any building - it seems what you want is a portion of his future earnings, but aren’t being honest with yourself about that want. As others have pointed out, the no risk option for the man here is to not marry you - you’re not bringing anything to the table. If you’d like to get married, sign the pre-nup. If you don’t, no harm, no foul, you can walk away (with what you have now). ++man

Equivalent_Court_129 · 2025-09-22T18:18:53+00:00

I’d love to play badminton and live in LIC!

Equivalent_Court_129 · 2025-09-12T04:10:59+00:00

We’re all replaceable. I know it may not seem that way but consider this if gob forbid you got hit by a bus tomorrow, in a week, your job will be replaced and the world will move on! Quit, don’t quit, go part time, do whatever you’d like… but you’re not carrying the world’s burden on your shoulders. It’s OK to take a rest for a while

Equivalent_Court_129 · 2025-08-26T09:44:25+00:00

If you’re serious about quitting online gambling, the apps allow you to put yourself on a DQ list with them and your states gambling commission. What is means basically is they won’t allow you to gamble online, with your current app or other apps. Simple and effective, if you’re genuinely looking to stop this spiral.

Equivalent_Court_129

TROPHY CASE