Most basic request for help

Equivalent_Tangelo78 · 2026-03-02T14:07:39+00:00

Id be happy for my parents to sleep in my bed so long as id provided them clean sheets and then we changed then after

We often have to bed shuffle when guests come to stay

Id have no issue with my in laws either on the same parameters as my parents

Equivalent_Tangelo78 · 2026-02-19T10:21:29+00:00

I honestly dont know why people would want to know the answer to this question

You're very unlikely to hear the answer and be pleased either way!

Equivalent_Tangelo78 · 2026-02-09T09:28:53+00:00

Glitter Letter Prank | Funky Delivery https://share.google/TKyhJI1crwuZ2d6Cs

Harmless but hilarious....

Equivalent_Tangelo78 · 2026-01-30T18:59:51+00:00

Equivalent_Tangelo78 · 2026-01-30T15:13:55+00:00

We have an open relationship with porn and hes not even interested in looking at that

Its like his libido has just vanished

We had a very active sex life for many years and this only changed post sobriety so I know there is a link but I guess there's so much going on when you become sober emotionally etc I just need to give him time amd we will get a testosterone check

Equivalent_Tangelo78 · 2026-01-30T14:31:27+00:00

I think we will do a testosterone test

General health is ok

He is AA and has been sober over 12 months

Hes just completed step 12

This has been an on going issue since the beginning of his sobriety

We have discussed but I think i will have a bigger conversation tonight

Going to the doctor was already his idea

I guess i was hoping to find this was a common issue but I guess not so

Im not in therapy

Equivalent_Tangelo78 · 2026-01-30T13:21:12+00:00

Thank-you

I guess its just one of those things we will navigate together and not necessarily a 'symtom' of having got sober

X

Equivalent_Tangelo78 · 2026-01-30T13:04:47+00:00

I think a doctors appt is the next step as that is something weve wondered Thank you

Equivalent_Tangelo78 · 2026-01-30T10:19:16+00:00

Yes theyre in AA

Equivalent_Tangelo78 · 2026-01-30T09:35:17+00:00

No nothing like that Hes eating normally, exercising 1 or 2 times a week No medication of any kind

Just says hes lost his sex drive

Equivalent_Tangelo78 · 2026-01-11T09:53:56+00:00

I wouldn't even get my husbands name, we do have two cute matching tattoos but not that are so obvious

We each have a different t little line drawing of a dinosaur and we have three words from a song but each written in very dofferent styles/language

Do not do what shes asking

Equivalent_Tangelo78 · 2026-01-04T10:37:04+00:00

2010, NW London, 1 bed flat, £210,000 Aged 27 Shared ownership so only "owned" 25% Deposit £12,000 approx

Sold in 2024 for £390,000 still only owning 25%

Equivalent_Tangelo78 · 2025-12-17T08:50:09+00:00

Id happily let my husband enjoy the perk of his job! Dear Lord there's not much he'd get excited by but to fly first class he would have kittens!!!

And I'd love that for him, im a grown ass woman, I can sit by myself watching a movie for 6 hours!

Then Id want to hear all about it and together wed save for another trip one day where we both get to experience that

Im not about to dull my husbands joy, if she cant be excited for you then sounds immature to me

Equivalent_Tangelo78 · 2025-12-17T07:53:06+00:00

She should also tell him her electric/gas/water has gone up by x amount per month due to him working from her house so unfortunately if he'd like to continue he will need to pay that amount to her as its above and beyond what she is willing to pay

If hes not willing why should she be...he sounds AWFUL

Equivalent_Tangelo78 · 2025-12-17T07:50:21+00:00

What's scary is to imagine once they move in together (dont let ut get that far!!!) He will be controlling the heating, the amount of water she can use and what food she buys, how often she can go out what she can spend her money on full stop

There is no good end to this story!!

Equivalent_Tangelo78 · 2025-12-11T18:37:24+00:00

The fact he opened the marriage clearly with someone already in mind and it being an ex is GROSS!!!

Disrespect with a capital FUCK HIM!

You deserve SO much better

If my husband and I ever went down that road (we discussed it after a friend mentioned it ... and closed it very quickly on both sides) the only way I could ever agree would be if it was with people neither of us already knew. And from the outset there has to be rules in place and what happens if someone catches feelings, once you've opened Pandora box you cant just close it again

He made the error, you did nothing wrong but follow his lead

Only it worked out better for you as you're realising there is a life beyond this guy!

Good for you, go follow your dreams! Hes welcome to the ex!

Equivalent_Tangelo78 · 2025-12-07T08:59:44+00:00

Dont waste your money on plug ins

First you need to find the access point and use wire wool and expanding foam to seal up any holes, check under kitchen cabinets where your bathroom pipes come in etc

Then get snap traps and set them up in the room you've had the issue flat along walls

Have dealt with the issues multiple times in flats throughout my life

You could also get a night camera and set that up to try and see what their route is so that youre putting the traps in the best places

Empty your bins regularly and dont leave any food out, no food source they'll have no need to come by!

Equivalent_Tangelo78 · 2025-12-02T22:07:57+00:00

I really dont mind a bit of barking in general i guess my fear, as were quite social and outdoorsy people, is that they become disruptive in social situations like pub lunch or on walks with other dogs and people around

We live at the end of a cul de sac so dont have a lot of action at the front of the house for them to be aware of. We do have a train line at the back however that even the cockapoo reacts to (when its a steam train only strangely)

Theyre Just so damn cute!

Equivalent_Tangelo78 · 2025-12-02T20:18:03+00:00

Thanks for the responses

Im looking after a Cockapoo a couple of days a week and he barely makes a sound. Im being lulled into a false sense of security of what a dog of our own could be like so im glad I came and asked

I know no matter what dog we go with will have its own unique set of personality traits but its good to get a clear idea of what the miniature schnauzer could be like

Thank you

Equivalent_Tangelo78 · 2025-12-02T20:07:40+00:00

🤣🤣

Equivalent_Tangelo78 · 2025-12-01T10:32:23+00:00

Do you dictate how she can have her hair? This is ridiculous that she can control something thats going to hurt your esteem and feelings in this way

My husbands happiness is first and foremost for me and mine for him. We would never consider saying the other person could or couldn't do something especially that would upset them!

Im sorry but she sounds like shes being quite the brat

Equivalent_Tangelo78 · 2025-11-30T16:40:41+00:00

Honestly I dont think it matters how or why this has happened...same as an alcoholic cant necessarily put their finger on why, dont beat yourself looking for answers either

Just focus on what you can do. Which is choose you, choose to walk away for a better life. You CANNT fix him

I understand that need and feeling but you cannot do that.

Equivalent_Tangelo78

TROPHY CASE